AIBU that I don’t think school uniform come soon under maintenance ?(55 Posts)
Mainly just looking for other views as it’s the first time I’m buying ( eeeeeeek)
DS starts school in September
Me and his dad split when he was 6 months- all amicable.
He pays me £150 p/m maintenance- we sorted this ourselves 4 years ago- I’m pretty sure if I went through child maintence I’d get more now
DS goes to dads 2 weekends a month, and every Monday for tea.
AIBU asking for help towards uniform? Or would you say this falls under everyday costs and should be covered by maintenance ?
For those of you saying £150pm is low.... my partner gets £98 a month from her ex husband for their son and that's what was decided by CMS. He does f* all for his kids, regularly goes out for the whole day when they come to stay at weekends and is basically a deadbeat in every single way. On the other hand, I contribute almost £1000 per month to support my 2 children and always try to ensure that all childcare decisions we make are fair and equitable. Bizarrely this leads to more conflict at home because I am "being too nice" to my ex-wife. Can't win. Sorry, rant over :-)
It does depend on earnings
My ex earns more than me, probably with overtime he can take home £40k pa. He pays me £60pw for 2 DC and has done for 10 years. He’s just bought a 4 bed house has 2 cars (one new) and goes abroad every year. He has only 1 DC for 1 night per week.
When I asked for CMS review he went to town on me saying he would just drop his hours to spite me etc etc, so we came to the agreement that all other expenses are split in half. All trips all uniform etc. I could have gone to CMS and ended up with much less and it would have been horrible for my DC too, so for the sake of piece he has got his own way and it’s him who has to reconcile his stingy ways with himself (1 child won’t even visit him) and it’s been really hard but sometimes it is not always worth trying to force something to happen IMO. The non resident parent should obviously want to pay, and pay fairly but this doesn’t always happen
I will be getting £30 a month for 4 children as of the end of the month as ex has started claiming benefits (up until now it’s been nothing at all) aS far as I’m aware maintenance is to cover school uniform.
As him but put a price in there so do your homework.
Or another alternative is, if he'd rather, get him to buy the uniform. My friend whenever asked by his ex if he could contribute would always agree, but rather than handing over cash, he prefers to go out and buy the item (his ex isn't the most reasonable, he pays well over cms recommendations)
I'm still fighting for my £75 a month from ex. Luckily I have a well paid professional job, eh?
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