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Is DP BU or am I being controlling?

(205 Posts)

MNHQ have commented on this thread.

Newkyred Fri 12-Jul-19 20:05:16

So for context we have 6 month old DS
I do all care- I mean ALL. His dad has never even taken him out alone, we do stuff as a family but all the care falls on me.

I have recently commented on this and said I expect more help, for example DS wakes at 6.30- DP gets up at 7 for work so I asked if he could do that 6.30 feed a few mornings, just to help. He seemed to understand.

Today DP working somewhere else 45 min from home ( usually 5 min away and finishes at 4.30 on a Friday )
He car shared there , at 5 I messaged asking when he was coming back
At 6.30 he messaged saying they had gone for a few pints and he wont be long.
It’s now 8 and he’s turned his phone off and I heard nothing else.

I’m annoyed because we planned a ‘ date night’ after a busy few weekends barely seeing each other so I’ve made a nice tea, for us some wine etc even shaved my legs grin

Am I just being over sensitive ? I just keep feeling at the minute that he isn’t interested in me and things like this really make me feel shit !

Durgasarrow Sat 13-Jul-19 14:46:26

Newky, I don't know for sure what your father would do, but it seems possible that he might treasure the opportunity to be able to help you, especially after what happened to your mother. It could be that by sharing your troubles, you would be giving him a wonderful gift of trust and feeling meaningful in the world again.

DrinkSangriaInThePark Sat 13-Jul-19 16:58:09

HappyLoneParentDay That's a standard warning that MN put on every thread where the OP appears to need mental health services. The 'financial' part is on this message all the time but it's not necessarily appropriate for each thread.

Wonkybanana Sat 13-Jul-19 18:04:08

OP he's abusing you. You have the baby, so now he feels he's got you trapped and he can do whatever he wants.

It will get worse. Please go to your dad's.

And read up on gaslighting - and how it affects your mental health.



billybagpuss Sat 13-Jul-19 19:23:45

How are you OP, I hope you were able to have a productive day. flowers

CurtainsAndCords Sun 14-Jul-19 12:12:58

How are you op?

Hope you're having a peaceful weekend whatever has happened smile

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