To wish MIL would get her own life(80 Posts)
DH told MIL we were considering getting a cat. She does have form for interfering behaviour, but this time she went ballistic. He showed me the following texts from her, more or less word for word.
"You who don't have time for us, but you are now getting a pet to look after?"
"Your house will be ruined. What a waste of money"
“Not happy about the litter tray and the children 😡”
DH (politely) texted that it is our decision and she went off on one again. “Well you just do what you want then as you always do. Either that you know we are right!"
He said to me he feels really down and undermined but he knows if he tells her that she'll just start moaning at him again. I don't know why she made the comment about us not having time for them, they come to over at least once a month for a cooked lunch. We saw them last weekend, the two weekends before that DH was working. We don't go round there much because they find cooking a meal for all of us a lot of work (we have two young DC).
It is between him and her, but I just wish she would butt out. AIBU?!
Bearing in mind my mother lives 400 miles away, and I've had animals all my life:
Told her we're getting hens - 'I wouldn't want them!'
A rabbit - 'But you won't have time to clean it out?'
A cat - 'But you won't be able to look after it. You never used to have to look after OldCat' (because I wasn't allowed to interfere)
and so on and so forth. DP and I have had many, many pets over the years, all spoilt rotten and treated wonderfully well. Now I'm pregnant, my mother has said more than once that I'll need to get rid of them, because there'll be too much mess. That's not happening!
is there a back story that you don't see her much? How often are you and dh in touch with her? Her response is ridiculous, but if that's the only contact she's had from your in months its slightly more understandable.
How much time does she think a cat takes up? Seeing her once a month sounds plenty to me, dunno what her problem is. She needs a hobby.
Our cat was around 8 when I fell pregnant with DS2. I had spoken in passing to my MIL about my concerns about the cat jumping in the moses basket etc - nothing we couldn't manage, just concerns. Soon after she announced that she'd been asking around for someone to take the cat permanently. I still can't get my head around the huge leap she made from idle chat to I need you to rehome my well loved cat
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