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AIBU?

To say postnatal wards are the least conducive environment for a mum/baby recovery

380 replies

cheesemumma · 05/07/2019 23:37

Currently sitting on a ward at 11.30pm. 6th night. No exaggeration I think in total I must have had 4 hours sleep. My physical and mental health is suffering. I'm going to have to talk to the Drs tomorrow and say we're going home whatever, as we're getting more ill staying. Its not just the other selfish fucker couples that decide to talk on phone /watch films/ have conversations with each other but the staff seem to not give 2 shits it's the middle of the night. I realise my tiredness and hormones are a big contributing factor but I can feel a full tantrum /meltdown coming on. It's also 10000000 degrees and the enviable screaming babies plus the fact you get 3 teeny portions of food a day so I'm really hungry as ebf.

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fancynancyclancy · 05/07/2019 23:41

YANBU, I paid for a private room (only available after birth) with DC2, bliss. Only stayed 1 night though but that is the time when you actually should be able to
sleep as baby is a little tired, just giving birth etc.

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megletthesecond · 05/07/2019 23:43

Yanbu.
I haven't been in one for a decade and I still get the shivers when I think back to those horrendous days in post natal.

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EL8888 · 05/07/2019 23:45

Sounds like hell! You are not being unreasonable. I would struggle with the heat, noise and being in such close contact to so many people

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TheBabyAteMyBrain · 05/07/2019 23:46

You are most definitely not being unreasonable. They are hell on earth. This sounds so God damn awful but I was almost glad when ds1 had further complications on day 2 and we got moved to a private room for treatment. I was going insane on the ward. Downside was we were completely forgotten about being in a separate room and I wasn't brought food and they missed rounds a lot.

I had ds2 at home, any future children will also be home births if all goes well.

I hope you're out soon and able to relax and enjoy newborn cuddles. Flowers

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Vinosaurus · 05/07/2019 23:47

Completely agree - was only in a night, but it was HELL.

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Fairylightsandwine · 05/07/2019 23:49

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

switswoo81 · 05/07/2019 23:54

Yanbu, I craved my lovely comfy bed and normal food. My local maternity hospital has 2 beds in a postnatal ward though which hugely cuts down on noise.

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TwistyTop · 05/07/2019 23:57

YANBU. They are horrible. I queried everything to do with keeping me in after birth. I wanted to know exactly what the benefit of being kept in was, and if it wasn't compelling enough I'd have said no and gone home. DH and I are both medical so have an advantage here, but I would urge others to ask these questions just so they know exactly why they are being kept in and what all the risks are.

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lyralalala · 05/07/2019 23:58

Hospitals in general aren’t great for recovery - they’re roasting hot, the lights are always on just outside the rooms (I know there are reasons for that), patients are moved in the night (again I know) and then you have inconsiderate people on top of it.

I was unwell recently and because my MIL used to be a nurse the doctor recommended I go home with strict things to keep an eye on as in his words “you’ll either melt, pick up a big or get seriously stressed in here”

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AllTheWhoresOfMalta · 06/07/2019 00:01

It’s my daughters birthday today, so easy to remember the night after she was born when it was equally as hot as it’s been today in London, and I was sat sweating my hormonal arse off.

My DH went home and brought me a fan in that afternoon because it was roughly 45 degrees in our bay and then the “Nursery Nurse” (no idea if that’s a genuine job in the NHS or just at that hospital) came in and told me that I had to turn it off because my baby would be cold. She also told me off for not having a hat on her. I pointed out that she was sweating and that indicated to me that she was probably hot too and that the recommendation was that she should be wearing one layer more than me and if I could I would be stark bollock naked, so her short sleeved/legged romper seemed about right. She did fuck off at that point but wrote in my notes that I wouldn’t listen to advice on temperature 😂

And yes, the noise is ridiculous and people are selfish pricks who have never heard of headphones or stepping outside to have a conversation on their fucking phones.

I insisted on being discharged after day/night 3 when I had finished a course of blood transfusions. They wanted to keep me in for another night for observation but I said that I genuinely thought I might lose my mind if I had to stay.

And yeah, the hunger is real. I used to have my husband sneak me up Subway sandwiches and snickers bars for in the night.

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Bibijayne · 06/07/2019 00:05

Do they have a private room you can be moved to? Also ask to see the ward manager/ lead sister to complain. That can usually help stuff short-term.

I do agree though, the recovery ward is usually the grimest part of a maternity wing.

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53rdWay · 06/07/2019 00:05

YANBU. They are horrible and God knows how you’re meant to rest and recover. Hope you get home soon.

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Mumof1andacat · 06/07/2019 00:08

Why are u still in hospital,? Is there a medical need to still be there 6 days after?

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lifeinthedeep · 06/07/2019 00:12

YANBU I spent 3 nights on the ward due to complications and started to seriously crack by the 3rd night. Women should be given their own rooms to recover after childbirth. Next time I’m leaving ASAP- even if I’m ill.

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EdtheBear · 06/07/2019 00:12

AlltheWhores that's bonkers but yes I've came across a Nursery Nurse in postnatal wards.

The one I came across asked if Baby had been bathed, then offered to do it, I was really tired so accepted. She appeared to check Baby's spine as she did it which made me think she was a specialist baby nurse.

Op YANBU post natal wards are hell. Who ever thought 4 or more babies in a room was a good idea?
Ok some hospitals would have been designed so babies were separated at night but still!

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Nat6999 · 06/07/2019 00:14

I was hallucinating by the time I discharged myself four days after having ds, I'd spent two nights in high dependency & two nights in a post natal room, the wing for my side of the city was full & I got put in the wing that had a lot of mothers whose babies were being taken in to care or had drug problems, it was bedlam, people kicking off 24/7. I'd also not had any sleep for the two nights I was being induced either. It's not the ideal place to be recovering from giving birth & I don't blame any mum from getting out asap.

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Pillowcase99 · 06/07/2019 00:18

Yanbu at all.

On my 3rd day in there post c section, someone visiting the patient in the next bay stepped back towards my bay and actually SAT on my bed (with the curtain between us). I had to physically push him off. These people had loads of visitors and really shouty skype calls with relatives overseas, and a snoring husband at night. I could have killed them. Oh and a window in my bay seemed to reflect into her bay so at one point i stood up, topless, and found myself staring the reflection of a teenage boy in the eye.

Hell. On. Earth.

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gamerwidow · 06/07/2019 00:23

I was in for three days and I don’t think I slept for more than 1 hour unbroken the whole time. I’d had an EMCS under GA and was absolutely exhausted by the time they finally let me go home. It’s torturous and the worst possible place to be when all you need to do is sleep and recover.
Why are you still in? If you really need to be then I think you have to stay to make sure you and baby are safe. It is horrible but in the grand scheme of things it’s a short time. I hated my stay but I think looking back I needed to be there.

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Lilyannarose · 06/07/2019 00:28

It's horrible. I had prolonged stays following two of my births and I agree the night times are horrendous.
Then at 7am I'd have the curtains surrounded my bed flung open by a not-so-cheery midwife announcing it was "breakfast time!".
I was happy to get home on all accounts.

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JemSynergy · 06/07/2019 00:29

I agree, I ended up staying for 7 days and by the end I was so exhusted and so hot. I actually collapsed due to heat and dehydration. I found it really difficult to get up as I'd had an emergency section and the nurses kept raising the bed so I couldn't get out of the bed. I wasn't offered any food either, I had to wait until relatives came with food or water. I remember saying to my husband please get me out of here I need to go home. Midwife overheard me and actually wrote this in my notes. I managed to get a private room when I had my second baby, managed to get some sleep but I was forgotten about completely.

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AlunWynsKnee · 06/07/2019 00:31

YANBU. I was on the post natal ward while my baby was in NICU. It was awful. I was kept awake by visitors and babies and Bounty ladies.

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FckIt · 06/07/2019 00:35

You are not being unreasonable my lovely.

I ended up self discharging myself in the middle of night as I had had enough. Oops.

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cheesemumma · 06/07/2019 00:40

Already cried twice tonight. Baby was prem. They said we have to weight until the morning to review her weight gain/feeding, I think she's fine. I may just insist on going. Because being here is literally only limiting my ability to feed.

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YesQueen · 06/07/2019 00:45

Not post natal but I got woken up at 1am (having only woken up from a 5hr op at 4pm!) I was wired after the GA and finally fell asleep. Side room, lights snapped on at 1am "what do you want for lunch tomorrow?"
Me HmmConfusedHmmConfused

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cheesemumma · 06/07/2019 00:49

Rereading posts. They set of my afterbirth cramps giggling. I'm the inconsiderate arse hole now. It's all too familiar. I intend to wander around the ward now telling anyone within earshot of a hcp I need to get the hell out of here and go home, in hopes it's written in my notes.

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