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children in care

(86 Posts)
RomanyQueen1 Mon 20-May-19 22:57:26

Wtf are there unregulated homes for 16- 17 year olds, it's disgusting in this day and age.
They are at risk, vulnerable and dumped.
i had no idea and can't get over it. Why is this allowed?

HennyPennyHorror Mon 20-May-19 23:00:25

What do you mean "unregulated homes"?

I know that kids of this age are often dumped in hostels and houses of multiple occupation. Is that what you mean?

Teens are hard to place. Not many can settle in foster places...they're often troubled and there aren't enough qualified people willing to take them sadly.

RomanyQueen1 Mon 20-May-19 23:04:15

On Newsnight, it's disgusting, they are just dumped in unregulated homes. No ofsted no registration, gangs, drugs and sexual exploitation.

HennyPennyHorror Mon 20-May-19 23:05:03

By homes do you mean actual children's homes? Or people's houses?

MenuPlant Mon 20-May-19 23:12:07

I saw this in the news today agree its totally appalling

Will find link

PCohle Mon 20-May-19 23:12:31

MenuPlant Mon 20-May-19 23:13:50

KissUntilTheyDieOfRabies Mon 20-May-19 23:14:29

There was a halfway house for older kids near a place I used to live. It had CCTV and there was occasional trouble. I felt awful for the kids who ended up in that situation.

PCohle Mon 20-May-19 23:14:28

"Newsnight has learned that - according to figures from the Department for Education - around 5,000 looked after children in England are living in so-called 16+ supported or semi-supported accommodation - up from 2,900 10 years ago.
This type of accommodation is not inspected or registered by Ofsted, even though residents are in the care of the state.

But because they are deemed to be receiving support, rather than care, the accommodation is not subject to the same checks and inspections as registered children's homes."

I was shocked too OP.

MenuPlant Mon 20-May-19 23:15:07

Sort of like halfway buses henny I guess with very little support

Left to fend for themselves

All the pimps drug dealers criminals etc know which houses they are

StopSpinning Mon 20-May-19 23:17:02

Absolutely disgraceful

Processedpea Mon 20-May-19 23:17:06

No investment in social care just cut after cut. Thus makes it so easy for children to just disappear it's tragic and will get worse. Yet we all go on marches for the environment and bleat being all so clever on Twitter about bleeding brexit and milkshakes.

EskiVodkaCranberry Mon 20-May-19 23:17:30

There is huge demand for care placements and zero options. It's a disgrace. Nobody is choosing these places, it's a last resort.

OrchidInTheSun Mon 20-May-19 23:17:45

They are magnets for pimps and pushers

Moominmammaatsea Mon 20-May-19 23:26:54

@RomanyQueen1, in answer to your original question, probably because there are no other options for these young people. Their birth parents are unable to keep them safe and there are simply not enough well-trained and well-supported foster carers who are willing or able to take on such challenging young people.

And, lest you think I’m being facetious, I was a foster carer for seven years and so I did take on the challenge of young people from dysfunctional birth families.

Nothing to stop anyone here up in arms about the poor quality state of care on offer to looked after children or teens ringing their local children’s social care department tomorrow to inquire about becoming a foster carer.

Bisset Mon 20-May-19 23:28:00

Nothing to stop anyone here up in arms about the poor quality state of care on offer to looked after children or teens ringing their local children’s social care department tomorrow to inquire about becoming a foster carer.


Tingface Mon 20-May-19 23:30:00

Nothing to stop anyone here up in arms about the poor quality state of care on offer to looked after children or teens ringing their local children’s social care department tomorrow to inquire about becoming a foster carer.

This with knobs on.

Processedpea Mon 20-May-19 23:35:42

I know someone going through this and the process is so long and badly managed it puts people off. Major investment in needed in all areas of children's social care but that's bloody obvious isn't it.

elsabadogigante Mon 20-May-19 23:36:46

Oh, they're well dumped around here, council block in deprived district. Regularly dumped into the 'homeless' flats in this block, usually until they're picked up the prison system. I'm surprised you're shocked it's 'allowed'. Where the hell else are they supposed to go? We've got two in the next stair. They've been placed here from London, which is about 300 miles away. It probably won't be for long, they've already been nicked four times in the fortnight they've been here.

elsabadogigante Mon 20-May-19 23:39:10

As for support, you're having a laugh. Our council's budget has been slashed to the bone.

CheshireChat Mon 20-May-19 23:53:57

The whole system seems to be falling apart, I can't imagine a lot of people will be lining up to become foster parents to challenging teens as there's loads of complications and not a lot of support (at least in my area). The only FP I know was complaining he had virtually no support and was struggling to cover the damages one of his FC caused.

Also, in my area they didn't even have any of the support houses so they sent the poor kids miles away at an exorbitant cost. It would've been far cheaper to purpose build a couple of them (as they are doing now) and they might've been able to afford some actual support for them.

However, the SS around here have just been declared inadequate by OFSTED so obviously there's issues in all areas.

Daffodils07 Tue 21-May-19 00:05:33

I was in care and as soon as I turned 16 I had to go into supporting lodgings, in the end I left at 17.
My social worker of her own back came round to where I was staying with two massive black bags of stuff for me (toiletries,stuff to make my new room homely) and I will always remember her for how kind she was to me when at the time I had to grow up so quickly through no fault of my own.
I would love to foster but unfortunately you need a spare room which I do not have!

alwaystimeforcakeandtea Tue 21-May-19 00:06:05

Yes it’s outrageous. What’s your suggested solution?

MilletSentToForceIt Tue 21-May-19 00:09:44

There was a programme on R4 about this a few months ago, where a fragile 16 year old boy was given a tent, a food parcel and a mobile phone with £10 credit, and his social worker drove him to a remote camp site, and left him there. He spent months there, with no support apart from families on holiday who feeling sorry for him asked him to share meals. There was a massive storm and he was frightened and his tent was damaged. He was assaulted, he couldn’t get any finance, so couldn’t get to college.

THe council concerned (I can’t remember remember who it was) was taken to court and were, I think, fined. Hi sorry social work team just said they had no choice.

I was so horrified, and so upset, I couldn’t even explain to my DH why I was sobbing.

BackforGood Tue 21-May-19 00:18:32

Because the most vulnerable in society are not looked after by society.
The cuts continue and continue and they don't have a voice to let people know. The more powerful voices look the other way.

Our local authority has made cut backs after cutbacks after cutbacks. I think the latest figure I heard was £600million since 2010.
The LA has cut over 12 000 jobs in that time.
Has it been headline news (you know, like when a car plant cuts 1500 jobs) ? No.
Respite care has gone. All the support services for vulnerable children had been pared back to the absolute bone.

But you know the only time it makes the media - social media, newspapers, radio or TV ? It's when the green bins aren't collected.

The overwhelming majority of people have very, vey little idea how the most vulnerable are been abandoned, and don't make an effort to find out, because t doesn't affect them.

sad and angry

NameChangedNoImagination Tue 21-May-19 00:20:44

Millet oh my goodness sad

Italiangreyhound Tue 21-May-19 00:24:52

This is truly a terrible situation.

Becoming a foster carer is a solution for some but those of us with young children may well not be able to foster older children. I would no be willing to foster children older than my own. Plus, despite being an adopter I am not sure I have the energy to foster or parent any more kids.

My friend is a foster carer for teens, she is utterly amazing. But it is not for all.

However, I expect all of us would like our tax money to go to caring for the next generation and keeping young people in safe accommodation and with support. So we can write to our local MP and ask what they are doing to change the lives of these young people. Money spent on youth is money well invested.

I don't think the answer is become a foster carer or do nothing, because I think there are other things we can do.

nokidshere Tue 21-May-19 00:38:10

Sadly the gap between being a child and an adult is huge in most services and so many people slip through that gap. It's tragic that these children are not properly cared for by anyone and disgusting that it's allowed to happen in the first place.

I was brought up in a children's home in Preston. Just prior to my 17th birthday I was given a small suitcase, £20 and was told I could leave now. There was no aftercare, no contact with anyone from the home or social services, and no transition into the real world.

That was in 1979. How sad that it seems little has changed.

Ghanagirl Tue 21-May-19 00:39:56

Couldn’t agree more, I definitely wouldn’t take a troubled teen into my with young children but would consider it once my two have flown the nest or are in their twenties.

mantlepiece Tue 21-May-19 00:42:28

I have a friend who used to foster teens. She went through a phase where the police were at her door almost every night. Delivering foster child back to her.
I spoke to another friend who is a social worker about the situation. I was so worried about these young people out at all hours in all kinds of dangerous situations. She cut me off at the pass saying you can’t infringe the children’s human rights.

So a foster parent can’t parent these cared for children like they would one of their own. There lies the problem.

HelenaDove Tue 21-May-19 00:46:00

Nothing surprises me any more sadly. sad

Orchidoptic Tue 21-May-19 00:47:16

I wonder how much more money there would be for looking after these children if MPs and councillors stopped lining their pockets with expenses?

MrsTerryPratchett Tue 21-May-19 00:48:09

I rarely do this but two threads have popped up. In one, you are saying you will never vote again. On this one you are complaining about policies implemented by government.

I work with young people and have for years, including in a shelter for 16-24 year olds. This government does not care about youth, homelessness, housing, youth crime and would happily see these children thrown on the trash. If you don't want that, vote. For a party that would at least try to reduce homelessness. It was done in the 90s and can be done now.

hazell42 Tue 21-May-19 06:25:09

Cost cutting is a major factor.
I worked with a fair few care kids and former care kids.
I worked with one who went from a secure childrens home to living on his own at 16. He was a sex offender who had raped his sister. For the first 3 months SS popped in daily for a welfare check, and then he was in his own. They rented him a small house, paid his bills, and left him to it.
The guy was one of the few genuine psychopaths I have ever met, and I found him profoundly disturbing.
But, whenever we raised concerns, and boy did we, we were met with a shake of the head and embarrassed mumblings about money.
It was unfair on him and it was definitely unfair on any child he came into contact with.

Sockwomble Tue 21-May-19 07:20:13

There are alternatives to foster care isn't available but there is no funding for it ( because a lot of people don't want to pay more to fund it).

Cottonwoolmouth Tue 21-May-19 07:24:47

I don’t know why this is a surprise.

My mother and her sisters and brother had their lives ruined by being in care home and sexually abused by multiple men.

Weedsnseeds1 Tue 21-May-19 07:31:55

It was Cornwall, Millet.
The kid did walk himself to college every day, amazingly.
He'd ended up homeless due to mental health issues.

GrapefruitsAreNotTheOnlyFruit Tue 21-May-19 07:35:56

It's terrible. I always think of this when people talk about calling social services and putting children into care.

Unless the parents are absolutely awful the government will make an even worse parent.

It's clear from multiple threads on mumsnet that we need to spend more money on important public services like this.

Weedsnseeds1 Tue 21-May-19 07:37:12

Web results
Cornwall council puts 'vulnerable' teenager in tent after he became ... › ...
He didn't want the move 30 miles away as he wouldn't be able to attend his college course. He did manage to go to college from his tent and do his coursework by torchlight. Until he ended up sectioned.

mrsed1987 Tue 21-May-19 07:42:31

Sometimes there are no other options for these children unfortunately.

Also to be clear, if you have left care you have access to support until 25, however you have to engage with it as you are an adult, it is not enforceable.

Grasspigeons Tue 21-May-19 07:47:06

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

runningtogetskinny Tue 21-May-19 08:03:03

I work in a care home for teenagers, it's incredibly complex. Sadly the experiences they've had in early childhood make it very difficult for them to trust adults and form lasting relationships. Young people where I work aren't moved on until around 17 and then it's into supported accommodation with staff on site, however, some struggle to adhere to the boundaries around drug use/criminal activity and end up being moved for the safety of others living there.

The kids people on here feel 'desperately sorry ' for and want more done to help them are often the same kids who get slated on here for using drugs in parks, stealing, being disruptive at school, being involved in anti social behaviour etc. Or people are urging parents to 'kick their kid out' for being disrespectful - can't have it both ways. The job is very rewarding, however, staff are physically and verbally assaulted, are expected to work 24 hour shifts 365 days a year, and the turnover is high - residential care is also VERY expensive for local authorities to fund therefore if a young person is rejecting the help offered and is a danger to others living there, there is always another referral waiting to take their place

amatsip Tue 21-May-19 08:18:07

I left my care home at 16 and had a room in a house, things got tricky for me and overdosed within weeks of leaving care, I remember my social worker picking me up from the hospital and literally dumping me into a young persons homeless hostel.

That was 1989, I was meant to be offered a proper home and have a resettlement grant and help to adapt to life outside care.

That never happened, I could have been dead for all they know.

I ended up living with some psychotic lad till I found my own feet.

MenuPlant Tue 21-May-19 08:21:24

Mrsed no other options than being left in a field with a tent?

Also agree with Italian. The idea that its either take in children or you mustn't have an opinion is ridiculous. Should the papers not report this?

People knowing what is going on and finding it bad can lead to other actions.

People care about lots of stuff the idea or all needs to be swept under the carpet I don't get it. If no one knows then it will definitely only get worse.

Agree it's money, obviously, combined with a govt who isn't interested. Street homelessness has exploded, 20 years ago there was hardly anyone round here sleeping rough. That is about government policy and priorities. We can push to change government or priorities. They should be accountable for what they do to people and if its hidden / no one is allowed to care unless they personally can solve it then we're fucked.

This comes up on threads about all sorts of things. Well, you don't like it you personally solve it. It's a bizarre response supposed to shut people down. Why shouldn't we talk about things in the news?

mrsed1987 Tue 21-May-19 08:55:59

menu i wasnt talkig about that, i was meaning unregulated homes. The tent thing is ridiculous.

Magenta82 Tue 21-May-19 08:59:14

This is what happens when people vote for a government with a policy of austerity.

It sounds lovely and sensible, like we are all in it together and tightening our belts for the good of the country. But in reality people are dying after being told they are fit for work, killing themselves because they have no money or hope, disabled people have no care and are getting stuck in their homes and children are being left with no help or support.

Meanwhile there are tax benefits for party supporters.

OwlBeThere Tue 21-May-19 09:13:48

I was one of those kids, I just upped and left and went to live in a squat with people who I at least felt safe enough to be able to go sleep and not wake up with all my stuff stolen. No one tried that hard to look for me. I was at college doing my a levels at the time and I can honestly say it was the worst few years of my life. It did get better when my boss at the pub I worked offered me a room but I worked like a dog for her in return. I slept about 4 hours a night for most of my second year of a levels. I went to two exams after all night shifts. And they wonder why the number of care leavers going to uni is so abysmally low.

NameChangedNoImagination Tue 21-May-19 09:44:13

Unless the parents are absolutely awful the government will make an even worse parent. Yes, grapefruits, I think many people have a very rosy idea of what care might be like, given the things people call social services for.

kateandme Tue 21-May-19 09:51:14

they have this for people coming out of mental health hospital too.they often dont end well becasue they are dumped there and not given the right support beforeheand they just arent ready.

ghostyslovesheets Tue 21-May-19 09:52:58

I agree with everyone saying look at the cuts to LA funding - there is no money!

also look at the cost of a private placement for a young person (1-2k a WEEK in some cases - more if they require 1-1 or waking nights)

It's totally wrong - but the pot isn't bottomless - more kids are coming into care - foster placements are increasing difficult to secure - especially for older kids with multiple problems - we are failing these kids as a society - look to your government - and VOTE!

kateandme Tue 21-May-19 10:10:14

access to support til 25
oh dont make me laugh.the care isnt there.people are screaming out(sometimes literally) for help and it isnt there and often people do not care.
there is still so much stigma attached to the most vulnerable people in our world so i do think this make it easier for people/government to ignore them.
can you imagine if this was the state of a cancer home or heart attack wouldnt be allowed.or certainly not once it was brought to the publics attention.
this is why it baffles me sometimes on threads when people are so quick to say call the ss.

lyralalala Tue 21-May-19 10:24:56

Cutbacks have decimated services everywhere.

That said some of the arbitrary rules annoy me. My local authority is constantly putting out appeals for foster carers. Yet friends of ours couldn't even get past the initial 'express your interest' stage because they have a rule that they don't allow couples with more than a 15 year age gap. They're 41 and 57. Now I could understand it if they spoke to them and discovered that they got to gether when she was 13 or something completely wrong like that, but they met at 30 and 46.

They also have extensive experience of children with severe difficulties, especially her, as she cared for her nephew until his death 5 years ago. They are basically the kind of people that are bring cried out for, and if he was 6 onths younger they would at least get the chance to meet the people in charge and be assessed.

Yabbers Tue 21-May-19 10:27:45

What we do to care leavers is criminal anyway. Here’s a bin bag for your stuff, off you go, have a nice life.

And we wonder why so many end up in trouble, homeless, in prison.

Like everything else with this government, everything stops when you hit adulthood. Of course, to some on MN that’s perfectly fine as we all know many think we don’t owe our kids anything once they reach adult. But at least in those situations we have generally raised them well.

Kids are not nurtured, encouraged, supported well in care then we kick them out as late teenagers. It’s shocking.

I’d like to see a regulated, support system which gives kids somewhere to turn to when they are sent out in to the world. Like a befriending service. I’d be happy to be the mum a young woman turns to when she doesn’t know what to do next.

BertieBotts Tue 21-May-19 10:29:08

I'm really shocked people don't know this - it's been this way for decades. Do most people have no contact/experience of the care system even second/third hand? I don't have first hand experience but I've known enough people involved some way or another to be aware.

Lyralala, they could try approaching a private fostering agency, some of them have different rules.

kateandme Tue 21-May-19 10:40:07

Yabbers i think a befriending thing sounds fab. unfortunately i think it will be upt to singular people like yourself to start somethign brilliant like that up as people ith the power dont care

Bookaholic73 Tue 21-May-19 10:42:41

I left foster care at 18 with no practical support whatsoever.
Luckily my last foster parents taught me how to cook, but the day I turned 18 SS washed their hands of me.
I had no idea how to pay bills, how to look after myself or anything.

I now volunteer to work with teenagers in foster care, and try to show them some life skills so that they are prepared.

WineAndArt Tue 21-May-19 10:52:15


I was in care too. At 16 you have to leave the children's home, so I went into a spare room of some people (a family) as supported lodgings. They were ok I guess, but clearly in it for the money at the end of the week. Withing a couple of months I got SS (I had a great social worker) to pay the deposit on a flat, so I had my own flat (I was still at school doing my GCSE's) and that was much better.
That was 25 years ago though.
Funding was short back then, no doubt it's even worse now.

WineAndArt Tue 21-May-19 10:52:48


lyralalala Tue 21-May-19 10:54:20

they could try approaching a private fostering agency, some of them have different rules.

Yeah they are now part way through the approval process with one.

It just seems bonkers that in a time of cutbacks the LA may end up paying an agency considerably more for them to foster because of a random thing decided without even speaking to them.

Lizzie48 Tue 21-May-19 11:30:00

My DDs’ birth mum grew up in care and was completely let down by the system. I counted at least 10 placements as a teenager, mostly in children’s homes. All they have done for her since she left care, as far as I can tell is remove her DC at birth; she’s had 4 DC plus 2 still births.

I’m not saying that the decisions weren’t correct, as she’s been in a very dysfunctional relationship, with a lot of violence on both sides, and they both have a lot of issues. I’m also grateful our 2 DDs were placed with us.

But social care have a lot to answer for in the way they let her down. angry

CatCatDog Tue 21-May-19 11:42:29

It wasn't any better under a different government, there was no support in the late 90's either. I don't know whether there was more money available but I was living in a bedsit in a converted house that was supposed to have a support worker based in one of the rooms. I never saw him, I don't know if that's because he wasn't there much or because I left for school before 8am, (usually back before 4:30).
There was trouble almost every day. Fights on the landings, my door was kicked in a few times, my things were stolen including my post, bank card, bank account emptied. The corridors regularly had vomit & drug paraphernalia left in them. The front door was often left open, the back door broken off it's hinges, the windows smashed etc.
The police visited after I'd had to report my money stolen & within minutes of them leaving I had people hammering on my door, demanding to know why the Police were there. It was intimidating but there was no one to speak to about it. We were all left to just get on with it, it wasn't a safe environment. I was scared to sleep, go out, stay in.
I lived on £37pw for electricity, food etc. My rent & council tax were paid for by benefits that I had to arrange myself with no idea of where to start. I had to sign a tenancy saying I'd pay the rent before I could claim housing benefit without the benefits people being able to tell me what I'd be entitled to. They couldn't assess me before I had a tenancy. I found this stressful as the housing association were telling me when I turned 18 they'd take me to court if there were arrears and at that point I had no way of paying. It was a vicious circle.
When I finished school I had plans to move away so ended, with notice, my tenancy and benefits claims. No one followed up.

Processedpea Tue 21-May-19 13:12:55

Cat what did you do next?

stucknoue Tue 21-May-19 13:28:18

It's not necessarily truly representative - until quite recently care finished at 16 and they were put into council housing or private flats! Dd has a couple of friends in hostels similar to those described and they are a half way house for independent living eg a caseworker lives in, they get skills lessons and yes it's inspected but not by ofsted as they are post school age. They can stay until 21 here

Snugglepumpkin Tue 21-May-19 13:56:21

You want to know where all the money goes?
Private landlords & private 'care' companies.

I was pregnant & homeless about a decade ago & placed in to one of those homes for teenagers as I was too old to be placed with the younger pregnant mothers.

The council paid £270 a week to the company (per person, there were 5 of us in the house) which paid for the rent, utilities (no tv licence) and the 'staff'.

Staff being a bloke turned up for about 5 minutes every week or so & left a half a dozen value toilet rolls.

That was ALL the supervision/care provided.
I was there for over 6 months, often the guy dropped off the toilet roll when there was nobody in so he often didn't see any of his 'charges' for months at a time.
One of the girls they were paying for never actually even stayed there as she lived with her boyfriend somewhere else.

Each bedroom contained a bed with 1 set of cheap covers & 1 pillow.
Some bedrooms contained an old wardrobe.

That's it.
1 small fridge to be shared between 5 strangers, 1 broken oven & one washing machine that worked along with 1 knife, fork, spoon, cup & plate per person covered the kitchen facilities provided

Perhaps if the council hadn't had to pay over £1,000 a week for 5 people to have a roof over their heads when the same houses were rented out for less than £250 a week to normal tenants they would have more funds for actual care.

When I went into labour unexpectedly whilst visiting the hospital on crutches without so much as a spare pair of knickers, the 'staff' couldn't be arsed to travel the 3 miles to drop me off some clean clothes because it was the weekend so I spent 3 days in the hospital wearing my dirty amniotic fluid stained skirt I gave birth in as the hospital wouldn't let me get a cab home leaving my newborn in the hospital to get something clean to wear.
I literally had no one else to ask.

I regretted asking as they opened my window while in my room picking me up a change of clothes & I was then robbed so returned to find all my baby stuff had been stolen along with my laptop etc...

That's private care companies for you.

Every one of those kids had social workers or probation officers, not a one of them ever turned up at the property in the over 6 months I was placed there.
I suspect they were all too busy trying to do their work for a damn sight less money than the private landlords & private care companies who are bleeding the system for every penny it might have.

Snugglepumpkin Tue 21-May-19 13:58:29

Two of those kids were 14 by the way, they were not all over the age of 16.

CatCatDog Tue 21-May-19 16:08:53

@Processedpea I rented the box room in a family home until they moved, then house shared until I got a place with DP.

mrsed1987 Tue 21-May-19 16:58:03

@kate - they are called Personal Advisors. Look it up

mrsed1987 Tue 21-May-19 16:59:21

Sorry hadnt finished. Everyone council has them. Some yp engage others dont. They have no obligation too

Bisset Tue 21-May-19 19:17:59

I don't think the answer is become a foster carer or do nothing, because I think there are other things we can do.

Of course it isn’t a choice between those two things.

But the OP (who I notice hasn’t returned) didn’t ask in a measured way ‘what can I do to make a small difference’?

The words “Wtf”, “disgusting in this day and age”, “dumped”, “i had no idea”, “can't get over it” were used, together with “Why is this allowed”?

Surely it’s not beyond the wit of man to realise that the reason this is ‘allowed’ is through lack of funding and lack of foster carers... and if you truly do feel so strongly about it, that you cant get over it, there is one really obvious, practical step you can take?

RomanyQueen1 Tue 21-May-19 19:25:24

I don't think the answer is foster care. It takes somebody special to be able to do this. It shouldn't be foster or anything else.
What obvious step? I'm too old to foster or adopt, and don't think I'm a good enough candidate tbh.

I just had absolutely no idea it was as bad as this. I'm going to look at volunteering somehow.
My sympathy to those on here who have gone through this, and the pp who said it was like this in the 70's and nothing has changed.

As a person born into the care system I thank my lucky stars I was adopted, this could so easily have been mine and lots more people's stories.

Underfunding is not a reason or excuse, it shouldn't exist. There is money to fund everything, we just have governments who don't think these kids are important and that's the disgusting part.

F1zzB1zz Tue 21-May-19 19:44:32

Bisset that is ridiculous.

Children in care deserve the right people to care for them.Many people wouldn’t cut the mustard. Then you get people who don’t have spare rooms and have stressful full time jobs or stress in their lives.

This oh just foster if you think young people are being let down is quite flippant and unpleasant.

Bisset Tue 21-May-19 20:49:37

This oh just foster if you think young people are being let down is quite flippant and unpleasant

So is virtue signalling on this topic...

Sugarplumfairy65 Tue 21-May-19 21:27:13

I grew up in care. When I turned 16 in 1981 I was turfed out into a bedsit the week after I left school. Social services supplied me with a set of bedding, 1 towel, I plate, bowl, cup, knife & fork & spoon, 1 small pan. It truly was horrific. Out of the 5 of us who left the home that summer, I'm the only one still alive. The others have all died either at their own hands of from drugs or alcohol. I started college in the September which is what saved me. I had one tutor in particular who really helped me.

Deadringer Tue 21-May-19 21:36:03

Can I ask if there is an option for children to stay in foster care after the age of 16? I am in Ireland and while our system is flawed and underfunded foster carers continue to receive payments for looked after children right through the college years if they remain with them. Sometimes the payment will be split between the carer and the child depending on circumstances, for example If the young person is living at college part of the week or whatever. Some children will choose to move on but the option is there.

ineedaknittedhat Tue 21-May-19 21:37:01

The govt are big on equality. They make the disabled, elderly, working class, sick, mentally ill and lone parents suffer, so why should children and teens be any different?

ineedaknittedhat Tue 21-May-19 21:38:36

The govt are big on equality. They make the disabled, elderly, working class, sick, mentally ill and lone parents suffer, so why should children and teens be any different?

Brainfogmcfogface Tue 21-May-19 21:38:42

My nephew is in one (he refused to come to me as I live far away and he didn’t want to leave his mates no matter how much I begged him) and it breaks my heart.
It’s awful! He’s kicked out at 8:30 every morning and not allowed to return before 4, but has been told on occasion to not come back before 6. He’s 16. Thankfully he has a best mate who lets him go to his place whilst parents are at work and he stays there, but there is zero support or anyone helping him to improve his life and other then one cooking lesson he’s been left alone and he has no one caring for him. Sadly I can see him hardening to cope, when he was such a loving little boy.
I’m in daily contact and desperate to get him to come to me, he’s really troubled, had a very hard life but he’s my boy, and hopefully I’ll get through his thick skull that a quiet life up here away from London isn’t the hell he thinks it’s be.

HelenaDove Wed 22-May-19 00:30:55

I found this stressful as the housing association were telling me when I turned 18 they'd take me to court if there were arrears and at that point I had no way of paying. It was a vicious circle.

Not surprised to hear this at all. Its always gone on with a lot of HAs But the difference now is its not as hidden due to social media.

Giggorata Wed 22-May-19 01:54:17

When our authority first started its Leaving Care team and services with the new legislation, in 2000, we had a Day Centre, some flats and bedsits, a team of 15 personal advisers working day and evenings, including some who ran the Supported Lodgings.
There was enough funding to pay rents, set up flats with furnishing and equipment, provide income payments for the under 18s to keep them off benefits, buy birthday and Christmas gifts, food parcels when they inevitably had cash issues, yearly clothing grants, interview clothing, college and uni grants, drop ins, meals, training, groups, incentives, etc.
We had a minimum standard for frequency of visits, but saw everyone a lot more often because they needed it. We employed some yp, too.

Nowadays, although I no longer work with care leavers, I see there have been so many cutbacks that most of these things have gone or been drastically reduced.
The team has been halved, they no longer work evenings, the Day Centre has gone, the yp have to bid for LA or Housing assoc properties which they can't sustain, so they get into arrears or disputes and get blacklisted, etc.
The setting up home grants are capped, there is more reliance on charities and the private sector re housing and support.
Yp at uni are expected to get loans and/or jobs, like anyone else. But they are not like anyone else, with parental support and reasonably stable backgrounds to go forward into a hard world.This is why so few care leavers get to uni, fewer still complete their courses.
The number of children in care, and therefore care leavers has increased and additionally each authority has a number of unaccompanied asylum seeking children and teens to care for, often arriving at short notice and traumatised.

But each local authority has been required to “save” millions of pounds every year.
This is a bullshit way of saying that the money to run services has been reduced year after year. This has been going on for at least ten years, and I have just heard that more “savings” are required over the next three years.

The principle behind the leaving care legislation was “would this be good enough for my child?”
It all seems a bit dismal now.
Sorry about the long post.... sad

GrapefruitsAreNotTheOnlyFruit Wed 22-May-19 08:15:42

@Giggorata what you describe sounds much better.

However I still think the best solution would be for young people in care to stay with foster carers until at least 18. Tbh it would be better if there was funding for them to stay at least in holidays and recieve support until they were launched successfully, so college completed, settled in first job. That way they can get emotional support in a family environment.

Even if you don't care at all. Having all these young people who fail to achieve independence successfully in early adulthood through lack of support will be very costly in the long run.

mrsed1987 Wed 22-May-19 09:09:08

Yp can stay with carers until 18, problem is, often the children have multiple difficulties and carers give notice, they then have different placements and end up in unregulated homes.

NoBaggyPants Wed 22-May-19 09:16:34

Poverty in the UK is 'systematic' and 'tragic', says UN special rapporteur

This is what the government think of vulnerable people.

BarnabasTheMaineCoon Wed 22-May-19 09:31:59

The lot of fostering is now contracted out, too, to private companies, who fuck the carers over, no support, so they resign.

Hyrana Wed 22-May-19 10:26:21

Magenta82 Tue 21-May-19 08:59:14
This is what happens when people vote for a government with a policy of austerity.

I HRTFT and I will but Magenta said it for me. It sounds lovely and sensible, like we are all in it together and tightening our belts for the good of the country. But in reality people are dying after being told they are fit for work, killing themselves because they have no money or hope, disabled people have no care and are getting stuck in their homes and children are being left with no help or support.

Meanwhile there are tax benefits for party supporters.

gotosleepalready Wed 22-May-19 13:23:50

@nokidshere what did you do? sad

nokidshere Wed 22-May-19 20:05:35

@gotosleepalready I slept on a friends sofa for a week, got a copy of "The Lady" magazine and found myself a live in Nanny job in London. I went back to the children's home and got them to buy me a train ticket. And never looked back.

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