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to murder disgusting smell-obsessed woman at work

(182 Posts)
Snuffalo Thu 16-May-19 19:42:59

I swear she has some kind of fetish. In the morning she tells us about the 'whiffy' (seriously) people she encountered on the bus. When she comes back from the toilet she invariably says things like 'smells like someone crawled in the pipes and died'. Today I was just about to take my first bite of some boring sliced edam cheese (that smells of nothing) on a fucking Ryvita and she says 'ooh good, it's your lunch, I thought it might be your feet for a minute there! Cheesy feet haha!' and I was so annoyed and disgusted I got up and threw the whole lot in the trash.

I'm the manager of her manager and I'm seriously considering raising this as a performance issue...

Samind Thu 16-May-19 19:44:36

I would. All that talk is enough to give you a complex!

TitusP Thu 16-May-19 19:48:39

I think the throwing your lunch away was a massive overreaction...

Actually I think raising this as a "performance issue" is a bit of an overreaction as well. She sounds a bit odd but I think it's more something to mention causally.

Snuffalo Thu 16-May-19 19:51:48

I should have said, I have already said things like 'that makes me feel sick, please stop talking about it' and she does stop whatever specific thing she is talking about that moment but something else always comes up. Also I know throwing away my lunch was an overreaction but I wasn't going to be able to eat it after that and sometimes I overreact because I'm human.

Undies1990 Thu 16-May-19 19:53:46

Don't be so ridiculous, that's not a performance issue - any manager would know that.
Have a chat with her about her comments rather than overreacting by throwing your lunch in the bin which achieves nothing.

Likethebattle Thu 16-May-19 19:53:59

It’s not a performance issue is it? It doesn’t affect her carrying out her role,

mollpop Thu 16-May-19 19:54:00

Maybe she has a very well developed sense of smell smile.

Perhaps you could mention it in a casual way if it's really bothering you. It's hardly a performance issue.

Cheby Thu 16-May-19 19:54:47

Raising it as a performance issue would be a gross abuse of your position. By all means sit her down, explain it properly and ask her to desist, but it’s not a performance issue.

Arabuella Thu 16-May-19 19:55:22

She makes comments you don’t like, it’s hardly an issue with her work performance.

Pinkyyy Thu 16-May-19 19:57:20

In what way is this a performance issue? You're a manager, you should know better than to do something like that.

kaytee87 Thu 16-May-19 19:57:31

How is it effecting her performance?

Snuffalo Thu 16-May-19 19:57:39

OMG I’m not ACTUALLY going to raise it as a performance issue any more than I am actually going to murder her! I didn’t realise this was take-everything-literally day, sorry!

EskeewdBeef Thu 16-May-19 19:58:40

Why do you think it's affecting her performance? She's got a heightened sense of smell, so unless she's a drain clearer I'm not sure why this is an issue that needs raising beyond 'Give it a rest, Susan.'

Arabuella Thu 16-May-19 19:58:48

OMG I’m not ACTUALLY going to raise it as a performance issue any more than I am actually going to murder her! I didn’t realise this was take-everything-literally day, sorry!

Well, you did say it FFS. What did you expect?

PerfectionistProcrastinator Thu 16-May-19 19:58:59


TheFatberg Thu 16-May-19 19:59:55

This is Mumsnet, unless you say "light-hearted," you're not allowed to use hyperbole. Those are the rules I'm afraid!

KatherineJaneway Thu 16-May-19 20:01:46

OMG I’m not ACTUALLY going to raise it as a performance issue

Shouldn't have said this then:

I'm seriously considering raising this as a performance issue...

kaytee87 Thu 16-May-19 20:02:02

I'm the manager of her manager and I'm seriously considering raising this as a performance issue...

These are your exact words. Doesn't really read like a joke tbh.

Snuffalo Thu 16-May-19 20:02:20

Thanks Fatberg I’ll try to remember for next time.

Newadventure Thu 16-May-19 20:03:43

I bet she's setting up to tell you all she's pregnant and that's why she can smell everything .
"Oh snuff, you know how I'm always going on about smells?? Well turns out I'm PREGNANT!! now find cover for my maternity, I'll be taking the full year. K Thanks.bye"


Or maybe she had a massive poo in the loo and tried to cover it up by blaming the pipes?? 🧐 something I would do anyway

londonloves Thu 16-May-19 20:05:05

I used to work with a woman who was totally obsessed with the toilets and other people's smells and all that, I found it quite boring to be honest and actually it did affect her performance as she wasted hours going on about it and printing out stupid laminated telling people off for "sprinkling when they tinkle".

SpecterLitt Thu 16-May-19 20:09:01

If what she is saying is bothering you why not mention it and ask her to simply tone it down? You throwing away your lunch is a serious over-reaction, you could have just said you're about to eat and would appreciate if comments were not made as they can be off-putting.

Unless what she says is seriously impacting your health and well-being just ignore it and don't give her a reaction. Hopefully the more she is ignored she will realise no one asked for her commentary on what she can or cannot smell.

Next time - don't throw away food over such petty things, it's such a waste!

TheFatberg Thu 16-May-19 20:09:06

Snuffalo it's a funny place sometimes.

Snuffalo Thu 16-May-19 20:10:16

@londonloves We recently had to issue a company wide rule about printing signs as there were so many about stolen mugs and cleaning the kitchen and washing your hands…now there is an official workflow for submitting suggestions for ‘polite notice’ signs through HR who will have them professionally printed if they are approved grin (none have been approved)

jade9390 Thu 16-May-19 20:12:46

Your the boss. Just tell her to shut up. She obviously is amused by bad smells. If she makes a comment about the toilets often and it is possibly a problem, ask if she would like to raise it as a serious complaint or to stfu. Cheese does not smell, I have joked with bosses who are also actual friends of mine outside of work. I would never have made such a comment to someone who was not, it would be disrespectful and rude. I think you should bring it up and tell her not to make personal, insulting comments to staff. I know she meant it as a crappy joke but someone else might be upset.

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