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Do I be honest what I think about this name

(303 Posts)
Driftingthoughlife Thu 16-May-19 17:21:13

With everything going on with DH (previous thread) I may be potentially be about to fall out with my best mate if I tell the truth
She is pregnant due in a month and she has texted me to ask what I think of the name they have chosen. I think it’s awful. She says she really values my opinion
I don’t know if I can take falling out at the moment so aibu to lie and say it’s lovely but at the same time in am thinking this poor kid has to live with this name

outvoid Mon 20-May-19 09:00:11

Glad she’s decided to put a full name on the birth cert, my Mother named me a diminutive and I hate it.

All hail honesty! I know someone who just called their baby Blossom Daisy Moon 😐. Imagine trying to get a serious job with that moniker.

ChocChocButtons Mon 20-May-19 08:50:59

Maybe say “It wouldn’t be my choice but if you love it then That’s all that matters.”

I like Nellie it’s cute. I think it’s one of those names as the child grows and you get to know her it’ll just be her name and you’ll end up liking it.

My sisters daughter is called Edith and I hated it when she first said but now I love it.

hellsbellsmelons Mon 20-May-19 08:40:10

That's a much nicer name.
Win win

8Wina4 Sat 18-May-19 17:32:07

This is the whole reason I kept my daughter’s name a secret until she was born. I loved her name and didn’t want anyone else’s opinion giving me doubts about whether to use it or not.
My siblings have all given their children (lovely) traditional names, and our chosen name is rather less frequently used (Eden) so it did raise a few eyebrows, but everyone soon loved it and it suits her perfectly.
I think if you’re confident enough in your choice, you shouldn’t need anyone else’s opinion on the matter. If she was dead set on using Nellie-Ann, she wouldn’t be asking and therefore I suggest you’re honest - but delicately.

Proseccoinamug Sat 18-May-19 17:01:08

Dd is Nellie. No issues whatsoever with it. I personally don’t want to saddle a child with ‘known as’ name and a different one on the birth cert.

lifetothefull Sat 18-May-19 16:54:11

Before baby is born while name is a possibility, you can be honest in a kind way if she has actually asked your opinion. After baby born and that is actually their name - say'aaahh, that's lovely'.

LordProfFekkoThePenguinPhD Sat 18-May-19 13:05:09

You obviously aren’t Scottish! Baroness Kennedy, QC, etc... always on the news when I was a kid.

anothernotherone Sat 18-May-19 12:50:13

I'd say hell-un-ah LordProfFekkoThePenguinPhD not ay or in. I've only heard Germans say hell-ayn-ah, I've never heard of Helena Kennedy.

LordProfFekkoThePenguinPhD Sat 18-May-19 12:43:23

I like ‘hell-ay-nah’ (Kennedy) but not ‘hell-in-a’(handcart)

Jojofjo44 Sat 18-May-19 12:35:57

XiCi why is Helena awful? What would you call her?
OP well manoeuvred. Helena is a great name. (We have a Helena Luna)

Motherontheedge1 Sat 18-May-19 11:24:25

Really dislike hyphenated names but that’s just a personal thing. Cannot think why your friend can’t see a problem with Nellie and where that might end up. I liked Tim for a boy but when my sister said ‘Tim. Nice but dim’ that ruled it out for me immediately. You might have to help your friend see the potential problems.

XiCi Sat 18-May-19 10:14:37

Thank you scubadive I am lovely grin

scubadive Sat 18-May-19 10:06:32

@XiCi you sound lovely.

For balance I think Nellie is awful and Helena is lovely, much classier. It will also avoid smellie Nellie at school which would be terrible for a child. I wouldn’t inflict that on any child growing up and parents who choose names solely because they like how it sounds without thinking from the child’s perspective how it will be for them growing up are very self focused.

HeronLanyon Sat 18-May-19 09:55:29

Well navigated op.
I like Helena - lots of nn potential in addition to Nellie

RaffertyFair Sat 18-May-19 09:51:09

You should have kept your nose out.

Eh? Her friend asked her opinion. Ignoring the question would be weird and to say "it's none of my business" would leave her friend forever wondering.

OP clearly went for the gentle, but honest approach. And the child can happily be called Nellie if she wants.

Driftingthoughlife Sat 18-May-19 09:43:02

No it’s none of my business unless my friend asks me and wants my full honest opinion

XiCi Sat 18-May-19 09:41:11

Helena is awful. Much prefer Nellie.

You should have kept your nose out. Absolutely none of your business what your friend calls her child

TheDarkPassenger Sat 18-May-19 09:38:04

Just read your update sorry!!

That is much nicer although I’m not a fan of Helena, but I like full names I’m not really into nickname firstnames.
Winner winner x

TheDarkPassenger Sat 18-May-19 09:36:49

I have an aunt nellie. It’s Eleanor though. I love it.

Not the Ann bit but I suspect she’s already made her mind up so I wouldn’t say anything!

mathanxiety Sat 18-May-19 09:06:37


Divgirl2 Sat 18-May-19 09:03:17

Oh thank god. Another win for honesty!

RaffertyFair Sat 18-May-19 08:34:37

Excellent up date! Well done Drifting

Driftingthoughlife Sat 18-May-19 08:32:52

I am still here. I suggested putting a fuller version of the name on the birth certificate and she is going to go for Helena and she herself has decided to drop the Ann

Elaine1985 Sat 18-May-19 08:15:42

I would be perfectly honest, that’s no about what other kids would end up calling her in school.

As an aside, back in school I had a friend who used to refer to her boobs as her ‘nellies’ winkgrin

dysongirl Sat 18-May-19 00:58:14

Nelly where I'm from is slang for vagina lol
Nelly Ann is a bit too little house on the prairie wink

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