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I am not a good wife

(42 Posts)
YourSarcasmIsDripping Thu 16-May-19 18:17:44

The onlyone that can complain (not judge) is your husband. No one else has the right to do so. My mum is horrified at how "neglected" OH is,he doesn't give a shit.grin

Oneofthosedreadfulparents Thu 16-May-19 18:17:05

Read your OP, went away and came back to see that what I was going to say had already been written. So in essence- I’m a great cook, half decent mum, shite housekeeper, and my DIY skills aren’t up to much. But as a partner, I’m supportive, I care how he feels, I invest in our future together and he does the same. Just worry about the important stuff, the rest is a distraction.

70sWitch Thu 16-May-19 18:12:52

Are you on the wind up?
Wife = sex and cooking?

Er.... I'm the worst wife ever then. confused

WorraLiberty Thu 16-May-19 18:08:46

Weird thread confused

Do you normally need this level of reassurance OP?

femidom12 Thu 16-May-19 18:07:03

Yes you need to go back to wife school lol

CherryPavlova Thu 16-May-19 18:04:06

My view is very outmoded; the role of a good wife is to be adored by her husband. Anything else is his bonus.

3in4years Thu 16-May-19 18:02:06

Yes, very outdated view but only just occurred to me that some might judge me as a useless wife. No-one says I'm not doing enough. I am doing all I can to be honest, I am shattered! But it is definitely dh who comes last.

KatyaZamolodchikova Thu 16-May-19 17:53:27

I am a terrible wife, I forgot DH’s birthday this year. We had only been married 4 days.

You need to put less pressure on yourself, sounds like DH thinks you’re a pretty ace wife.

Gth1234 Thu 16-May-19 17:50:31

All men (well most) complain they don't get enough. (sex). You sound OK to me. More importantly, your DH seems to agree. Who said you weren't; doing enough?

Namastbae Thu 16-May-19 17:33:11

It sounds like your measure of a "good wife" is someone who provides food and sex for their husband which, to be honest, seems very outdated!

To me, being a good partner is about being a part of a team. So finances, childcare, housework, down time, sex -it's equal, mutual and shared.

Sometimes I'm a great partner, sometimes a rubbish one -same for DH. No one is perfect all the time.

3in4years Thu 16-May-19 17:26:16

Thank you. My dh thinks I am great and never complains. But he would love more sex!

YourSarcasmIsDripping Thu 16-May-19 17:19:24

Do you want to be a good wife?
Is your husband complaining?
Do you want to change things for yourself or because of some arbitrary idea of what a "good wife " is?

For the record,I don't cool for OH and sex ,while great,it's pretty rare. I'm still an awesome partner.

The80sweregreat Thu 16-May-19 17:19:14

Your doing well.
I hate cooking and been married for nearly 30 years. Dh is a better cook than me and I just cook easy to do stuff.
Looking after small children is time consuming!
Has he said anything about it?

Bunnica15 Thu 16-May-19 17:16:06

You don’t sound rubbish to me!

Orangecake123 Thu 16-May-19 17:15:59


Orangecake123 Thu 16-May-19 17:15:33

OP you're doing you're best.That's all that matters.

3in4years Thu 16-May-19 17:14:20

I've just realised that I am a shit wife. I almost never cook, and we almost never dtd.
I go around thinking I'm ace because I work part time and keep 3 little kids alive and loved, get them to school etc on time, take them out a lot, keep the house cleanish and tidyish, stay in touch with friends and support family, do exercise...
But I am a rubbish wife. Must try harder! Anyone else really rubbish at one area of life? Prepared to be told off!

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