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Child using potty in public

(244 Posts)
Moominfan Mon 06-May-19 19:15:59

I'm pretty easy going, bordering on complacent to mumsnet standards. Went to a fair today. Kid and dad in queue. Dad whips out Potty and the kid does their business there and then. Is this what I have to look forward to? Mines not potty trained yet. Would most people atleast go hide behind a bush or something? There were loads of people around. Place was heaving.

Copperandtod Wed 08-May-19 21:24:36

Absolutely potty

TheBubGrower Wed 08-May-19 21:16:02

yemen to be fair we've only had to do it that once in a shop, it's hardly a regular occurrence and obviously we do like every other parent does and prompt my DS to use the toilet before leaving the house etc. It's not like we are actively encouraging public potty wees, it has been used in public on maybe 3 occasions when not near a loo, and only in a shop on that one occasion, and I hasten to add when there was nobody else nearby. I think if you're only relying on potties in public areas and not actively encouraging using toilets when they are available then that's not good training, but I don't know anyone who does that. I do however know people take potties with them as emergency back ups.
I have seen many other parents carrying potties around, and according to this thread it's apparently quite common to let your child shit in a bush, so I guess each to their own? 🤷‍♀️

BarrenFieldofFucks Wed 08-May-19 21:08:06

Your son doesn't sound late at all bub, but sitting on a potty in a shop is still odd.

YemenRoadYemen Wed 08-May-19 20:53:32

TheBubGrower - you realise that sitting a child down on a potty in the middle of a store is something that only a vanishingly small number of parents actually do, right?

Is it a frequent occurrence round your way, or something?

TheBubGrower Wed 08-May-19 20:05:33

Yeah, I got that thanks. It was a joke

Copperandtod Wed 08-May-19 19:52:56

He’s not the disgrace though!

TheBubGrower Wed 08-May-19 19:45:02

"Bit late to potty train 3 year old bubgrower. Not doing well for 3 year old to potty in middle of toy shop. It’s a disgrace. You shouldn’t be proud. More ashamed" hmm

Hang on hang on, but I thought the perfect parents thought you should wait until the child is "absolutely ready" before potty training and that if anyone has accidents that clearly means they weren't ready?? So, what is it - train them the moment they turn 2 or wait until they barely need training? You guys aren't making it easy for us mere mortal ghastly lazy parents to follow...

And yes we did start just before he turned three because he wasn't showing signs of being ready much before then and I was heavily pregnant before then too. Is that okay with you, or is that "disgraceful" too? I think you need to get over yourself if you find it so offensive to see a small child learn to use a toilet (fyi it was only a wee if that helps) and yes I was proud of him because he'd been having accidents and was not initiating using the toilet very often so actually I thought the fact that he realised he needed to go, whilst being distracted by many exciting toys, was something to be proud of. I certainly wasn't going to tell him he was a disgrace 🤣

acquiescence Wed 08-May-19 19:41:23

We use a potty in public, I probably wouldn’t for a poo in a queue though. When out in parks I keep one under the buggy and use discreetly. We have used in town in a discreet area. Obviously we would use toilets as a preference. If there is a poo it is tipped into a poo bag and then the potty wiped with antibacterial spray.

My boy is 3.5 and had a lot of bowel issues requiring hospital care, simple constipation which caused impaction and soiling. It is important that potty training was relaxed for him so to not relapse. However, my friends who have had no issues also use a potty in public. Again, not in a queue and probably not in the middle of a shop.

ForalltheSaints Wed 08-May-19 18:16:14

I cannot get the mental image of the potty being whipped out as if by magic out of my head!!!

OP is not being unreasonable to find this objectionable. I understand that it may be too far to find a toilet, but at least somewhere discreet and then finding a toilet to empty the potty would be better. Though best of all is training a child to know to go before going out etc.

Copperandtod Wed 08-May-19 18:09:07

Bit late to potty train 3 year old bubgrower. Not doing well for 3 year old to potty in middle of toy shop. It’s a disgrace. You shouldn’t be proud. More ashamed

EvilMorty Wed 08-May-19 17:49:35

Is the boot of my car public though?

YemenRoadYemen Wed 08-May-19 17:27:30

* A child’s bowel is not an amazon prime delivery, you can’t specify not between 7.30 and 9 please, as I’m doing school run then and a rogue shit would be inconvenient to scornful strangers I’ll never see again.*

And yet somehow, vast swathes of parents manage to toilet train multiple children without whipping potties out, and having them do it in public.

TheBubGrower Wed 08-May-19 16:29:29

Ha probably @Lizzie84 or there is just some medical parenting trick that I've clearly missed as my 3yo is 3 months into toilet training and still has the odd accident, usually when he's too busy / too stubborn to go! 🙄 But then I'm one of the "ghastly" and "lazy" parents who has taken potties out and about so it's obvs all my fault (according to the perfect parenting brigade on here). Hasten to add I've never had cause to let him poo next to a queue of people but i did let him wee on his potty in Smyths when we early into potty training and I was really pleased with him for telling me he needed to go whilst in the very exciting environment of being surrounded by toys!

"A child’s bowel is not an amazon prime delivery" 🤣🤣🤣 quote of the day evil

Lizzie48 Wed 08-May-19 13:55:14

TheBubGrower My DM has always insisted that her 3 children (my DB, my DSis and I) never had accidents once we were properly potty trained.

I think it’s a case of rose-tinted glasses, and she did rely a lot on au pairs back then. Besides. I remember a couple of accidents myself.

It’s called rose-tinted glasses.

Treesthemovie Wed 08-May-19 13:41:17

That's bizarre, I've never seen someone in public let their child take a shit in the middle of a queue, then hurl the shit into a bush. Surprised that so many people think it's normal. This is Mumsnet though and my standards seem different to many people's on here.

Quintella Wed 08-May-19 13:05:15

Just don't let your kid shit in a shop or a restaurant and everything will be rosy.

TeddybearBaby Wed 08-May-19 13:04:08

If I do suffer incontinence as an elderly person I really hope I’m treated with dignity and not asked to go to the toilet and be wiped in the middle of a restaurant or shop 🤞🏼

EvilMorty Wed 08-May-19 12:42:55

We made sure wherever we were, there were toilets, went before we left, after lunch etc.

Are there toilets on the side of the A10? Oh where please? I’d like to know how can I make sure there is a toilet? (There isn’t by the way)

A child’s bowel is not an amazon prime delivery, you can’t specify not between 7.30 and 9 please, as I’m doing school run then and a rogue shit would be inconvenient to scornful strangers I’ll never see again.

God forbid any of you encounter incontinence when you are elderly.

RainbowWaffles Wed 08-May-19 11:27:08

Sorry, but live and let live doesn’t extend to me being forced to watch your child potty in a restaurant or a supermarket. I couldn’t care less if it is used in a discreet fashion behind a bush in the woods or at the side of the road on a car journey.

Basically wherever adults might relieve themselves out of the way in an emergency is also acceptable for a child.

MidniteScribbler Wed 08-May-19 09:43:35

To their credit, no-one (staff or customers) said anything.

Not to your face.

SnuggyBuggy Wed 08-May-19 08:14:27

To be fair with the closures of public toilets lately maybe people pissing in gutters will be a more common sight

nomad5 Wed 08-May-19 07:47:26

When we were on holiday in Italy when DS was potty training, he used our foldable travel potty and a bag (for a wee only!!) in one of the courtyards of the Vatican grin I expect I was VVVU according to some on this thread. However it was a long sprint to the toilets and the (chuckling) staff agreed a discreet potty in a secluded part of a courtyard was better than an accident. We are all god's creatures, no??? grin

InTheEndgameNow Wed 08-May-19 07:41:40

A travel potty has its uses. Our DD got "wees" straight away, but poos took about six months. There was no way I was putting my life on hold for that amount of time.

When in town we would run to the nearest loo, and in a soft play we would use a pull up.

However we live in a rural area and do lots of walks. Rural wees behind bushes are fine, but poos are more problematic, so a travel potty with a bag was a life saver. Tie the bag up and take it home, job done.

There's no way I'd let her use it in a shop or cafe though.

Yabbers Wed 08-May-19 07:40:20

That’s nasty.

Another example of the entitled generation of parents raising the entitled generation of kids.

Went out plenty when we toilet trained DD. We never used a potty as she couldn’t sit on them. We made sure wherever we were, there were toilets, went before we left, after lunch etc. We drove long distances. Never once had her do her business in public. It can be done, it just takes more organisation by the parent and so isn’t the easiest option.

outvoid Wed 08-May-19 07:16:47

I’ve seen this a handful of times as well including in the middle of a supermarket confused. Potty trained three DC and can confirm, I never took a potty outside with me! I don’t understand why it’s necessary.

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