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I would really appreciate your views on this please

(56 Posts)
howwudufeel Fri 26-Apr-19 13:59:17

I have changed a view details but essentially how would you feel in this situation? DD was very badly bullied for about six months by a few girls. It was absolutely horrendous and the bullying was very cruel. These girls did everything they could to humiliate and ridicule Dd. I noticed that Dd became very unhappy and withdrawn as did some teachers. Eventually it came out (Dd burst out crying and told me everything). The school were informed. The girls who were responsible were very much the queen bee and her entourage types. Very bright and very popular. The school love these girls and their parents. To be fair the girls admitted what they had done and said sorry to Dd. I think the main queen bee got a day long suspension. I don’t want to go into detail about the bullying go fear of being outed (I have namechanged) but the bullying was sustained and some of it had a sexual element. It was very weird and very humiliating. If we had gone to the police I believe the girls would have been in big trouble.
Here’s my problem. The queen bee who was at the heart of this has just been made head girl. I am incredibly angry and upset and I wonder how others would feel in the same position?

NormHonal Fri 26-Apr-19 18:19:44

My DC’s bully was allowed to stay on in a similar position of responsibility in spite of being punished repeatedly for poor treatment of others.

I made my feelings known. Not a lot changed.

Sadly it’s very much a school where the Queen Bees are allowed to flourish at the expense of others, and it makes the lives of other children miserable.

bellinisurge Fri 26-Apr-19 18:20:22

I'd be annoyed. A little bit of me would want to fast forward to 35 years later and see what a shocking mess they made of their lives. As I am in my 50s, I can actually do that about some queen bee types I knew at school. But this is of little comfort when you are in the middle of it.
The school has fucked up.

howwudufeel Fri 26-Apr-19 18:20:30

The bully and their entourage did stop the bullying but they still swagger around the school like they own it. Bully has made racist comments in the past and has a superiority attitude and whilst I have had little to do with them since it happened I can’t imagine they have completely changed.

Sindragosan Fri 26-Apr-19 18:29:59

I understand on a personal level that it hurts, but it is a good life lesson if you want to call it that, that not everyone in a position of power is a good person.

I had a sheltered life and was then massively shocked when I went to university and one of the senior lecturers was a massive racist, misogynist bully. Same when I started work, majority of the senior management team were real arseholes.

howwudufeel Fri 26-Apr-19 18:47:19

That is very wise Sindragosan

coldshins Sat 27-Apr-19 01:19:38

It's not too late to involve the police if that's what your daughter wants. It's never too late.

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