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Baby on plane

(138 Posts)
Jobea91 Tue 23-Apr-19 17:08:08

My parents recently paid for a surprise holiday to France for September. My DS will be 18months. My parent originally said a holiday somewhere in England so they could confirm dates but the surprise is it’s an all inclusive in Spain for me DH DS and all my siblings. I’m really excited.
DH today said he’s read things about air pressure changes being painful to babies and that it worried him so much he doesn’t want DS to go, he said he’d stay home with him for a week (which would be hell for him doing 24/7 with her alone) so I can still go, but my family and me are all really excited for DS to go, first time swimming, going to the beach, flying, different country etc.
My parents have already paid and we got him a passport especially.
DH said from what he’s read he thinks it’d be abusive to take him until hes 5 and can understand what’s happening air pressure wise etc.
Me and my sisters flew loads as babies and toddlers and I’ve always loved flying. DH is okay with it but doesn’t have same excitement as me.

I said I can’t/won’t take her if he doesn’t want me to but I disagree it’s so painful we should cancel and make my parents pay all cancellation fees etc.
I said I’ll look at other ways to get there.

AIBU for feeling annoyed he’s decided this? He said we agreed to a England holiday not Spain (he hates surprises). It’s difficult if it’s something he genuinely thinks is abusive.

notangelinajolie Wed 24-Apr-19 08:27:30

I think his reasoning is a red herring. He doesn't like the fact someone else is paying and dictating to him where and when he can go on holiday. He has hatched a plan to stop this holiday by trying to guilt trip you into not going because a) he believes you won't leave him to look after the baby on his own. b) taking a baby on a plane would make you a bad mother.

He sounds like an arse.

Aldilogue Wed 24-Apr-19 08:17:11

My 3 have all flown from Oz to UK numerous times with no issues. He’s being weird.

LindsayDentonsWineBottle Wed 24-Apr-19 08:11:47

I’ve been taking my DS on flights since he was 6 months old, at 18 months we flew to LA, he was absolutely fine, (albeit a bit tetchy with tiredness). Your DH is being a bit ridiculous.

Don’t cancel the holiday, it isn’t fair.

Starlight2004 Wed 24-Apr-19 08:04:52

We took our Ds1 to Tenerife at 8mths with no problems and ds2 to Majorca at just 8 weeks and he slept the whole flight. Holidays with little ones are fantastic family experiences and it would be such a shame for you all to miss out on that! It's perfectly safe.

Slicedpineapple Wed 24-Apr-19 07:33:10

This is ridiculous. As a child I flew very regularly from 18 months old. My first holiday was 10 hours long haul.
Assholes used lots of words about me (still do!) to describe the fact we holidayed regularly, but never once did anyone say it was 'abusive'.

The pressure change can hurt your ears when landing but it can hurt adults too. Give your LO something to suck like a dummy. They will be fine. I can guarantee the fun they will have on holiday and memories you will make will hugely outweigh the 20 mins of possible uncomfortability during landing.

witherwings Wed 24-Apr-19 07:31:37

We flew to Australia when my dd was 16 months. She was fine and not bothered by take off and landing at all. As pp have said, take a bottle / dummy / lolly to suck on and they will be fine.

CherryPavlova Wed 24-Apr-19 07:21:36

Just get the child to swallow by sucking on something to reduce change of air pressure effect on ears. Breastfeeding, if you do, is good. Sucking on a straw is good.
He’s bonkers.

Bobcut Wed 24-Apr-19 07:17:58

Have I read this right? My kids flew at 6m/8m/14m/16m/20m between them and your baby is 18m?
And it’s only to Spain? We have done 13hours direct with 8m/2years.

Don’t let a silly uneducated false opinion of your husband ruin a lovelyholiday and gesture off your parents!!

ethelfleda Wed 24-Apr-19 07:13:35

My 18 month old has been on a plane loads. First time when he was 6 months. He was absolutely fine. Your DH is being stupid.

Mother87 Wed 24-Apr-19 06:33:10

He's hugely over-reacting/irrational about this... another here who flew long-haul with babies many times - with NO adverse effects (apart from slowing the cabin crew down when they kept stopping to say hi to said baby/iesgrin)

SnowsInWater Wed 24-Apr-19 06:22:08

I'm sorry but he's nuts. I have flown with my kids from two weeks old, they just need something to suck on if they need it on take off and landing. He's trying to get out of it with a shitty excuse.

JenniferJareau Wed 24-Apr-19 06:00:20

Sounds like he doesn't want to go on that particular holiday and this is his best excuse. Try and convince you that you'd be hurting your own child so you give in.

ChristmasArmadillo Wed 24-Apr-19 05:57:57

My children, 5 and under (down to a baby), have been on 23 flights. Zero ear complaints. He’s being ridiculous.

theonewiththecats Wed 24-Apr-19 05:49:34

has he ever flown? I guess he may scared of flying and doesn't want to admit it. fear of flying isn't that uncommon.

PregnantSea Wed 24-Apr-19 05:45:10

He's making excuses because he doesn't want to go, for some reason.

Durgasarrow Wed 24-Apr-19 05:26:12

Kids fly all the time.

Birdie6 Wed 24-Apr-19 05:15:30

They just need something to eat / drink and their ears equalise . I was on a plane the other day - there were about 20 little kids on there too, all going somewhere for Easter. From tiny babies to toddlers . They all survived perfectly well . Yours will be fine.

HoppingPavlova Wed 24-Apr-19 05:02:31

For the vast majority of kids there is no problem and it's not at all abusive. For a small number of infants/children no matter how much they suck etc on change of pressure they will be in excruciating pain and will scream and everyone will shrug them off and think it's not that bad (when it really is). The problem is you don't know which camp your child will be in. Odds dictate they will be absolutely fine but you never know.

I have known a couple of kids who have very real issues in this regard and why their parents insist on travelling with them beats me (and that's coming from someone who lives on a whopping big island where plane is really the only way to escape grin ). Even when made aware of the absolute pain the child genuinely endures they will look at you and ask for pain meds as if that will solve the situation confused.

Fazackerley Wed 24-Apr-19 05:01:57

I've also done multiple trips to Asia OP and every single flight I've ever been on has plenty of babies. He must have seen them? He sounds batshit.

ittakes2 Wed 24-Apr-19 04:49:16

Ring your doctor and ask him or her to speak to him.

Mummyoflittledragon Wed 24-Apr-19 04:37:45

😂😂😂 Said like someone, who has no idea what it is to parent a 5 yo. My dd is 10. She used to be fine flying. Pressure changes were a easily dealt with. Now she’s a very anxious traveller due to falling ill on a plane a few years ago. As a result she now gets pretty anxious at take off and landing and as a result finds the pressure changes very frightening.

Just leaving a small list of things parents obviously shouldn’t do to their babies as they don’t understand and can get very upset. My dd objected to all of these at first :
- swimming
- giving her a bath
- hair washing (this was as a young toddler and went on for a long time it was horrible)
- sleeping alone
- tooth brushing

Gosh a lot of child abuse there. <eye roll>

mathanxiety Wed 24-Apr-19 03:45:22

Your DH is batshit.
Is he always such a misery?

Let the toddler suck on a bottle or a lollipop for take off and descent.

I have taken babies and toddlers on transAtlantic and internal US flights. All they need is something to suck on.

pinkgloves Wed 24-Apr-19 03:35:19

I used to fly with babies and kids every week for work and since with my own ds since he was 4 months and he's been at least 3 times a month for the last five years.

He's talking absolute shite.

DS has never once had an issue.

Of the other 50+ babies and kids I flew with a couple squeaked a bit when they were around 2-4 years old but not even cried.

Limpshade Wed 24-Apr-19 03:30:55

Sorry but I laughed out loud at abusive! My first daughter literally went around the world twice before her first birthday, including on what was then the world's longest flight (17 hours). And he's worried about a shorthaul trip to Spain grin Sorry, he's nuts.

PBobs Wed 24-Apr-19 03:23:57

Christ. What a nutter. I think there is definitely more to this than the baby.

Our pfb (and only ever) DC will be flying at 4-6 weeks on a 10+ hour journey. I flew from a tiny age. I love flying. A fruit lolly/bottle/breast feed/dummy is what's needed to prevent earache.

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