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To think my sister is batshit

(164 Posts)
Isitweekendyet Tue 23-Apr-19 16:42:42

I'd reply... 'That's fine if you no longer wish to do birthday presents, neither we or DD would expect it, she would have been over the moon with a phone call or text. But please do not equate your pets to my child.'

But yes, OP, you're sister is batshit - and a cow at that!

CheesePuffTheMagicDragon Tue 23-Apr-19 16:42:38

Have you posted about this before? If not the incidence rate is shocking grin

Clutterbugsmum Tue 23-Apr-19 16:42:37

I would think that it not your sister that doesn't want children and she doing everything to keep her husband happy. So she giving all her 'mothering' on to her dogs.

I wouldn't stop responding to her pictures, you letting her think you are as interested in her dogs as she is.

coolestmum Tue 23-Apr-19 16:42:36

Yep, sounds like she's lost the plot. That's a bit of a weird comparison.

I think you need to pop round and talk it out.

Floralnomad Tue 23-Apr-19 16:42:15

I wouldnt respond , I buy my dog birthday presents , I don’t expect my sisters to do so . When it comes to Christmas I would just give them a box of biscuits and stop presents altogether .

Poloshot Tue 23-Apr-19 16:39:24

Sounds like a proper nut case

Kaddm Tue 23-Apr-19 16:38:30

I just wouldn’t reply.
Your dd will have plenty of people in her life anyway.

AestheticPerfection Tue 23-Apr-19 16:38:01

That's a bit weird.

OliviaBenson Tue 23-Apr-19 16:36:38

She's being very OTT about the dogs, but equally why are we all meant to adore everyone else's children? Some people just aren't into kids. She's never going to be the aunt you want for your daughter, so don't try and force it.

fanciedabitofachange Tue 23-Apr-19 16:35:58

Omg are you talking about my sister in law? This is exactly what mine is like!

Witchofzog Tue 23-Apr-19 16:32:35

I buy presents for my dog but I would not expect anyone else to do this or even to know when my dogs birthday is. She is being ridiculous

Aquamarine1029 Tue 23-Apr-19 16:30:35

Your sister is very self-absorbed, clearly, and I wouldn't hold my breath waiting for that to change. As for buying presents for her dogs, she is completely batshit.

I'm sorry your daughter won't ever have the aunt she dreams of, but this is simply never going to happen. I would make some distance between you if it were me.

sendinallthesheep Tue 23-Apr-19 16:28:55

I wouldn't text her anything back, I would have a face to face conversation with her.

I'd want to know why it's suddenly an issue that you haven't bought presents for the dogs, if it's something you've never done. And I'd try to explain that while the dogs will literally have no idea you've missed their birthdays, your DD might be hurt that her beloved auntie hasn't so much as sent a card.

But honestly, she sounds bananas so I would tread very carefully. You know your sister best but if it was my sister, I'd be wondering if there was something wrong.

CaptainJaneway12 Tue 23-Apr-19 16:22:59

Younger sister, good relationship and quite close, not as much over the last couple of years though - she isn't as available with work / life etc.

When I had my daughter she was very excited to be aunt - she overstepped occasionally, calling in unannounced and daily and announcing birth on Facebook before I had chance to tell family... But I let it go as was pleased she was excited. This lasted around 4 months, then she lost interest.

She now sees DD at family gatherings, takes very little interest and has said she does not want children of her own. She never asks after her and seems frustrated with her after a short time. It upsets me as DD loves her aunt and is not naughty, just normal with lots of energy.

Sister is married and they both say that they never want a family and I know this to be true (so it's not down to fertility issues) as I took her to get map once last year and she wants to get sterilised. Despite this I still thought/hoped that she was pleased to be an aunt.

She has 2 dogs that she dotes on and sends me lots of messages/pictures of them (I don't do this with DD as she doesn't seem interested and I do t want to be a baby bore to her) I'm not really a dog person but feign interest and always ask after them and get them little doggy treats/toys if I visit.

Previously with birthdays she has dropped a present over and wished DD happy birthday. This year (5th,) nothing. I messaged her about a week after asking how she was, didn't mention birthday as assumed she had forgotten and didn't want to make her feel bad. She replied she was fine, and asked if DD had a good birthday, so hadn't forgotten. I replied she had and would love to see her aunt. She responded, "well bear in mind I won't have a present for DD, you didn't get -Dog1- or -Dog2- a birthday gift so we won't be doing birthday gifts either."

To be clear, I am very generous at Christmas and birthdays with her and her husband and am aware she has an extra person to buy return gifts for so go a little extra for them. (I have said not to bother buying for me and DH) and I have never done birthday presents for the dogs... Never occurred to me and wouldn't even know when their birthdays are.

DH says sister has lost the plot, I'm inclined to agree. Feel sorry for my DD as her adoration for her aunt obviously isn't reciprocated.

I haven't replied to sister. Don't even know what to say!

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