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Pregnancy announcement reaction

(91 Posts)
Catmom2019 Tue 23-Apr-19 15:23:17

My husband and I announced our pregnancy to my BIL and SIL yesterday by showing them a scan picture. SIL said they had known for ages and had been watching my moves for months and that it wasn’t at all a surprise. I was so taken aback as my husband and I hadn’t told anyone our news and didn’t come up with excuses about not drinking etc by swapping drinks at family get togethers etc. They didn’t congratulate us and that was the end of the convo. I was quite upset at her comments and his lack of interest so I text her earlier saying how upset I was at her reaction. BIL is now attacking me for making her upset! AIBU? The only thing that made me text her was because she had text me saying you need to find out the sex. Tell me off if you think I overreacted...

AryaStarkWolf Tue 23-Apr-19 15:24:59

They were a bit rude but you probably over reacted aswell with the text

Cel982 Tue 23-Apr-19 15:25:40

People love telling you they knew all along, I've found. It's slightly irritating, but try not to get upset about it. I doubt they meant any harm, and they seem excited about the pregnancy. And congratulations! flowers

HennyPennyHorror Tue 23-Apr-19 15:25:43

Perhaps they're having trouble conceiving and this was more than they could bear?

99calmbeforethestorm Tue 23-Apr-19 15:26:14

There reaction was disappointing but it’s your babies not theirs and they are not going to be very excited about it. There was no need for you to text her and complain. In future if you need/want to complain then do it over the phone or in person so it doesn’t escalate.

RedPanda2 Tue 23-Apr-19 15:30:40

Meh I would probably say congratulations but wouldn't be bothered. It was a bit OTT tiotext her

kaytee87 Tue 23-Apr-19 15:34:57

Completely ott to text her like that.
They should really have said congratulations but you don't know what's going on in their lives so I'd just get over it and thank your good fortune.

kaytee87 Tue 23-Apr-19 15:36:10

And it can be pretty obvious when someone is TTC or is pregnant especially if you're in regular contact - even if you think you've been really discreet.

Didntwanttochangemyname Tue 23-Apr-19 15:36:19

I think @HennyPennyHorror has hit the nail on the head.

pessimisticstateofperception Tue 23-Apr-19 15:39:14

It's not very interesting at this stage to anyone except you and your husband.

Sounds like you werent as sneaky as you thought you were grin

ethelfleda Tue 23-Apr-19 15:39:30

It was a shit and annoying reaction but I wouldn’t have text her to tell her that. People are odd.

SylvanianFrenemies Tue 23-Apr-19 15:40:38

Their reaction was a little disappointing, but not worthy of being followed up with a text. I would also wonder if they are having troubles. I would suggest against showing scan pics uninvited for this reason. Congratulations and enjoy your pregnancy.

Isitweekendyet Tue 23-Apr-19 15:40:59

They were rude, unreasonably so.

I hate the excuse that an inability to conceive gives you the right to be completely insensitive and sometimes even bordering on mean.

Irregardless of whether they can conceive or not, this was your news and they should have graciously congratulated you.

I say all of the above having taken nearly ten years to conceive DS and having had three complicated miscarriages in the last five years. It's not an excuse.

tanpestryfirescreen Tue 23-Apr-19 15:41:19

Announcement!

You dont make an announcement, you just tell people.

It is your baby- how exciting for you. For everyone else it is probably just the cycle of life.

OnlyFoolsnMothers Tue 23-Apr-19 15:45:17

Not very nice of them at all OP- but i wouldnt give it a second thought. Dont engage too much with them, and good luck with everything.

Aquamarine1029 Tue 23-Apr-19 15:45:42

Confronting her by text, (like a teenager would do), with a pissy message was a really bad move. What did you possibly expect to achieve by that? Yes, your feelings were hurt because your expectations weren't met, but now you've created a rift that might never be repaired.

SylvanianFrenemies Tue 23-Apr-19 15:46:45

I don't know isitweekendyet. Also having had losses agree that such troubles don't stop you congratulating in theory. But if I'd had a scan pic waved under my nose after my most recent loss I would have been really thrown and may have been quite disjointed in my response. I could have forgotten to issue congratulations on my focus to stay composed.

Bentley111 Tue 23-Apr-19 15:49:31

I would agree with pp's that it's likely they've had losses or are having trouble TTC. It is very upsetting to have scan pictures waved under your nose in those circumstances.
I think texting her was very OTT.

bluebluezoo Tue 23-Apr-19 15:52:58

I’d be pissed of about being told I needed to find out the sex. I don’t, and it’s not anyone else's business.

Apart from that it’s just you being offended they didn’t ooh and ahh over your amazing announcement. The text was unecessary and self-involved.

Some people just aren’t interested in pregnancy. Like pp have said it is often very easy to tell when people are ttc, even if you do think you’re discreet. You are often more sensitive and alert to other people’s pregnancies if you are ttc or pregnant yourself.

It’s hardly ruining your moment.

OnlyFoolsnMothers Tue 23-Apr-19 15:54:06

I dont think OP was asking for a fan-fair just a "congratulations"- is that too much to ask of family...geeezze

NotMyUsualTopBilling Tue 23-Apr-19 15:54:21

YABU.

Yes, a congratulations is usually the standard reply but tbh sometimes it's just not that exciting to other people especially the dreaded scan photo! I assume there is more context to this and you were having a chat and a giggle about how they could've known already rather than just "I'm pregnant, I already knew" end of. It may well have just been lost in the conversation and they moved on naturally?!

Even if they were being rude at the time, your SIL struck up a chat showing interest later on via text and you shot her down. I'd think you were a stroppy arse tbh.

PlainSpeakingStraightTalking Tue 23-Apr-19 15:57:55

I was quite upset at her comments and his lack of interest so I text her earlier saying how upset I was at her reaction. BIL is now attacking me for making her upset!

You actually text someone to complain they didnt react how you wanted them to?

I've yet to meet a bloke who gets excited about anyone other than his own wife being pregnant.

Happyandglorious Tue 23-Apr-19 16:01:26

I would avoid discussing the pregnancy again with them if their under reaction (rightly imo) upsets you.
No point having it out with them they were rude and didn't like being told so.

Mummyoflittledragon Tue 23-Apr-19 16:01:48

You overreacted. Life doesn’t always pan out how we would wish in an ideal world. She contacted you. She was trying and you decided to react negatively.

NaturatintGoldenChestnut Tue 23-Apr-19 16:01:59

YABVU! All this tweeness over pregnancy is so self-absorbed. The whole 'announcing' and not telling anyone (a lot of women who've had babies already can tell a mile away) then expecting a load of congratulations is misguided because most of the time, it's just not that interesting to anyone but your nearest and dearest.

Maybe they're not having trouble conceiving or had losses, maybe they've decided they don't want any kids at all and aren't fussed about other peoples'.

Just move on.

RelaisBlu Tue 23-Apr-19 16:03:08

But isn't she showing an interest by asking you about the sex of the baby?

Catmom2019 Tue 23-Apr-19 16:06:11

Thanks everyone. Yes I probably did overreact but I felt so gutted by her dismissive comments especially as my MIL kept telling me “oh they will NOT be surprised when you tell them!” So it felt like she had been saying it behind my back. Never mind... was just looking for some input.

Cantthinkofausername1990 Tue 23-Apr-19 16:06:51

You were upset at her comments?? Her comments being that she said they knew already... and then you texted her to tell her. Yes you are being unreasonable.
They aren't going to share your level of excitement, it isn't their baby.

yumyumpoppycat Tue 23-Apr-19 16:13:18

They probably had been discussing it and your mil was giving you a heads up. Which scan was it? If it was 20 week scan then you probably could have told them a little sooner - if 12 weeks then Yanbu. Their response was a bit off though - they should have congratulated you.

Illberidingshotgun Tue 23-Apr-19 16:13:34

It's often easy to tell when a couple are expecting - it can be very subtle signs, such as slight changes in the interactions between the couple, or showing more of an interest in other children in the family. I've often "known" before an announcement.

It doesn't sound as if she has said anything nasty or derogatory, and I wouldn't necessarily expect them to be overly excited about the news, especially if they really knew anyway.

As others have said, perhaps they are having problems conceiving, or other issues in their lives.

Dvg Tue 23-Apr-19 16:21:50

Yabu, even though i would have said congratulations i cant lie i wouldn't have been bothered with your announcement, i really don't care who is and isn't pregnant as cute as baby's are i just wouldn't be interested in someone elses pregnancy unless it was going to affect my life ( for example it was my child or my mother that was pregnant).

Tinkobell Tue 23-Apr-19 16:22:29

Strange. But probably they've got a story of their own re: kids / conception and that shaped the weird reaction. Maybe it's a sore topic between them as a couple so they cannot be pleased for others.

gamerchick Tue 23-Apr-19 16:30:01

Yes a congratulations is easy and they should have said it. But that text would be a signal to give you a wide swerve from now on. Struggling to get pregnant or not. The 'Im pregnants' get tiresum to be around quite quickly.

Maybe you should apologise for the text.

MaMaMaMySharona Tue 23-Apr-19 16:30:17

Going against the grain here, but I'd be upset too. It's a big excitement for you to announce it to people, and for them to react in such a blase way is rubbish.

For people saying that it's not that exciting for other people - that's not very nice. I've had 2 friends recently announce their pregnancies and I am over the moon for them.

Can understand if there's sensitivities due to losses/issues conceiving though.

Butterflyone1 Tue 23-Apr-19 16:30:22

If I were in your position, I would also be upset. However, perhaps there are things going on in their lives that make your happy news difficult for them.

I actually respect you for texting SIL to say you were upset. So many people would just b*tch behind their backs but you actually said something and that takes guts.

Anyways congratulations on your happy news and I hope everything runs smoothly.

pessimisticstateofperception Tue 23-Apr-19 16:34:50

For people saying that it's not that exciting for other people - that's not very nice.

It isn't exciting though. You're basically telling people you shagged a few weeks ago.

When the baby is born, that's different, as there's a new little person to meet, but, unless directly involved, pregnancy is boring.

GreytExpectations Tue 23-Apr-19 16:35:33

I think it was rude that they didnt give you a congratulations. They are close family, not just some random friends. Congratulations is the polite and appropriate reply. I also dont feel like fertility issues gives people a free pass to be rude. However, ywbu to text her- that was a tad immature and unnecessary.

OrdinarySnowflake Tue 23-Apr-19 16:36:30

Congraulations.

But, well yes, they probably have known for ages, and been discussing it - it's exciting news, of course they'll have had a quiet little "do you think CatMom might be pregnant?" chat if they noticed drink swapping etc !

So many couples, I've clocked that they are probably pregnant and hiding it for ages. Never ask because obviously it's a private thing - I knew SIL was pregnant from their discreet little drink swapping about 6 weeks before they did a big announcement.

It's entirely down to them, but when it's something you've realised ages before, then they won't be shocked or as excited, you probably caused that reaction when they realised, but it was "old news" by the time you told them so you missed the excitement stage.

There's also possibly a bit of disappointment to realise they weren't told before 12 weeks, usually couples keep it quiet until the scan except for those close enough that they'd want their support if they had a miscarriage, realising they aren't that close to you that you wouldn't want their support with a MC might well be a bit upsetting.

Catmom2019 Tue 23-Apr-19 16:37:10

Thank you so much for some of your nice replies. She is such a diva and I felt like I had let her away with so much over the last few years (like when she was jealous over me getting engaged first and then she got engaged a few weeks later, waited until we booked our wedding for a year later and she booked hers four months before ours). It sounds so childish I know. I just thought I’d be honest rather than ignore her and let her think it was okay to gossip behind my back, especially when I had already had a miscarriage.

CordeliaWyndamPryce Tue 23-Apr-19 16:38:45

but you actually said something and that takes guts.

Nope, she sent a text to her SIL which takes absolutely no courage whatsoever. Its a wimps way out of actually confronting someone and has a tendency to escalate the situation.

And texting that they weren't excited enough is petty in itself, but doing so immediately after she'd text to say about finding out the sex is bizarre. If they really weren't that bothered she wouldn't have text at all!

PinkHeart5914 Tue 23-Apr-19 16:40:18

Ok so sil didn’t congratulate and they already guessed you were pregnant 🤷🏻‍♀️ Not great but not a big deal either, it doesn’t sound as if they said anything nasty? I can often also tell when someone I know is pregnant before they announce it, I think having had dc myself I just pick up on little things.

Your text was weird and unnecessary in my opinion, I’m not even sure what upset you?

Also you do have to remember most people won’t find your pregnancy as exciting as you, the baby isn’t in there womb.

Seriously just move on.......

ChicCroissant Tue 23-Apr-19 16:45:07

Oh dear, perhaps SIL should have been a little more 'surprised' but your MIL had already told you she knew!

I do think you overreacted with the text tbh. I do wonder if you have not been as discreet as you think, it is often pretty obvious to observers if someone is pregnant. Congratulations from me, OP flowers

codenameduchess Tue 23-Apr-19 16:52:08

It's a bit of a let down, but really it's only exciting for the parents to be.

I hate this 'announcement' fad that everyone is buying into and am kind of sick of having to pretend to be excited about other people's babies (said as a pregnant women, I don't expect anyone else to be that bothered)

FineWordsForAPorcupine Tue 23-Apr-19 16:52:39

I agree that often people "guess" that someone might be pregnant weeks before it becomes official news, but I think there's a bit of confirmation bias going on - it is a tiresome fact that, if you are female between the ages of twenty and fifty and in a heterosexual relationship, people will "guess" that you are pregnant pretty much every week. Double that if you got married, engaged, bought a house, started or finished a course of study, changed jobs or looked at a child with anything other than rank disgust in the past year.

I have a friend who interrupts with "omg you're pregnant!" every single time I say I have any kind of news to tell her. If I ever do get pregnant, she will discount all the times she was wrong and have JUST KNOWN the minute she set eyes on me.

Either way, when someone tells you they're pregnant, you react with surprise and delight, not crows that you knew already. Even if theyre nine months gone and you can see a head emerging smile

viques Tue 23-Apr-19 16:53:48

Maybe she was upset they only warranted a look at the scan and you didn't lay on a big surprise baby reveal with cakes, balloons and poppers!

Congratulations btw.

ClaryFray Tue 23-Apr-19 16:55:38

After suffering with fertility issues got years, id have up and left the room. So they did better than me.

Not everyone will be happy for your news. Remmeber that, nor do they have to be.

viques Tue 23-Apr-19 16:57:53

PS if your MIL knew, then presumably your other side of the family knew as well so to say nobody had been told isn't quite true!

OneDayillSleep Tue 23-Apr-19 16:57:59

I’m not really sure how you were anticipating they would react? I guess they should have said congratulations, that’s a bit off. Although you have to understand that for many people a pregnancy announcement is really not all that exciting, obviously it is for the parent’s but everyone else meh. You might also consider that they could potentially be trying to conceive? Who knows? I certainly wouldn’t be texting someone because they didn’t react how I wanted them to, that’s odd.

Raffles1981 Tue 23-Apr-19 16:59:36

My father's reaction when I told him -
"Oh. Ok then"
People can be shit at times and you won't always get the reaction you want. It was U of you to txt it out - I'd have just accepted the reaction for what it was.

Floatingfancy Tue 23-Apr-19 16:59:53

Fertility issues are not an excuse to be a dick to other people.

I say that as someone with fertility issues.

Ali1cedowntherabbithole Tue 23-Apr-19 17:01:56

Congratulations on your pregnancy, you must be delighted, especially after a MC.

In all likelihood SIL wasn’t surprised because MIL had already told her.

I do tend to agree with PP. Tell people, share your news and let them know you are excited, but for the love of Dr Spock, don’t “announce” it, unless you are actual royalty.

PositiveVibez Tue 23-Apr-19 17:02:19

I can't imagine my husband being beside himself with excitement if I told him one of my sisters was having a baby. He would probably be like 'ooh how lovely', but that would probably be it.

Was it your husbands brothers wife?

I can imagine I would be very happy for my brother in laws wife if she was having a baby, but I couldn't imagine being overly excited about it like I could if it was one of my own family.

TheOrigRightsofwomen Tue 23-Apr-19 17:02:33

Wow, some of you lot are a miserable.

A women telling her family she is pregnant is lovely news.

In our family both the 1st and the 14th grandchild have been celebrated in the same way, with excitement and anticipation and happiness.
At times when some sensitivity was needed, that was there as well.

OP, I would have been very upset. Without knowing all the complex family dynamics it's hard to know how to take the text exchange, but they could at least have said congratulations and asked you how you've been feeling.

Congratulations on your pregnancy.

CuriousaboutSamphire Tue 23-Apr-19 17:07:54

You actually text someone to complain they didnt react how you wanted them to? Well, technically she repsnded to a text from SIL telling she needed to find out the sex of the unsurprising child!

doing so immediately after she'd text to say about finding out the sex is bizarre. You mean demanding as that is how OP felt that text read!

Weird!

Woman announces imminent first born.

Other woman pisses on her party

Who gets moaned at?

Yeah, right. Only on Mumsnet! You mean spirited harridans!

Catmom19 Congratulations! Ignore the surly response. She will have her own perfectly illogical reasons why she was not simply being congratulatory. Get your DH to tell his DB(?) that his wife can stop being so upset now, she has made her point!

ScreamScreamIceCream Tue 23-Apr-19 17:11:26

A pregnancy announcement is boring but a child that interacts with you isn't.

Two of my siblings weren't interested in my pregnancy announcement, but like my baby especially when she passed 3 months.

outpinked Tue 23-Apr-19 17:12:14

Have skim read the thread but I haven’t seen a mention of whether SIL has experienced losses herself or is struggling to conceive. It doesn’t give you a right to be a dick to people but having a scan photo waved in your face could be utterly heartbreaking, I know I wouldn’t have coped with it following my miscarriages.

I wouldn’t worry about it, I think your text was a bit OTT but just let the situation go. Just be happy you have a healthy baby.

tanpestryfirescreen Tue 23-Apr-19 17:16:33

and she booked hers four months before ours
then she got engaged a few weeks later

She- so he had no involvement?

It sounds like you dont like her and are looking for excuses to validate your feelings.

You are coming across as petty and spoilt TBH.

Momma2be2020 Tue 23-Apr-19 17:17:30

They still could of said congratulations, and even if they said we had a suspicion you might be. But they seemed rude. Seems to be one in every family. Focus on u and ur baby & not on them.

TheCatDidSay Tue 23-Apr-19 17:19:42

I can imagine my sil being pissed I wasn’t happy or excited enough when she announces but it’s just another baby.

If it was one of my children then that would be a whole different kettle of fish but a in law pregnancy isn’t that exciting.

newbabyyy2019 Tue 23-Apr-19 17:20:51

I wouldn't worry about it. Everyone has different reactions to pregnancy announcements, I was really excited to tell my sister who I've always been really close with about me and DP having a baby and I gave her a card with the scan and a lovely poem about her becoming an auntie and she opened it and said "oh okay, I knew it would be this when you gave me the card" (all with a straight face, no excitement) then went on to say that I'd ruined her surprise of news that she'd just brought her first home with her bf and "great well you've outdone me so thanks" made me feel really shit but I'm 4 months pregnant now and although I always ask her about what's going on in her life, she hasn't once asked me anything about the baby or how I'm feeling. You just have to grow past it and not let it get to you..!

willitbe Tue 23-Apr-19 17:21:12

It is not like you got a bad reaction, it was just not the great reaction you were hoping for. If she was competitive over the engagements and weddings as you say, you can bet that she has been trying to conceive when she suspected you were, especially with the miscarriage (whether or not she had been discussing it with your MIL). So you have beaten her too it again. You should have anticipated that you would not get a great reaction again. Her asking about the gender of the baby was showing an interest, regardless of her intention behind that interest. For all you know she might be in the early stages of pregnancy herself and worried about miscarriage.....

My MIL and FIL actually gave horrible responses to each of my pregnancy announcements. First one, "oh, ok" , followed with my FIL having a heart attack 2 hours later! The second "really shouldn't you have thought about money before getting pregnant again" and then the third "well don't expect us to babysit, we can only manage two."
In reality my PILs could not cope with pregnancy announcements, but love their grandchildren.

So with your situation, you need to not have high expectations of good reactions from your BIL and SIL, but also no more horrible texts to them, no matter how competitive they are being. And just in case they are suffering infertility - don't go rubbing your excitement in their faces! Keep that between your dh and yourself and anyone else who truly is interested.

Congratulations on your pregnancy, hope it all goes smoothly for you.

NameChangeNugget Tue 23-Apr-19 17:21:27

YANBU. Their reaction was odd and rude

Teddybear45 Tue 23-Apr-19 17:24:34

Your mil clearly already said something.

Highlights12 Tue 23-Apr-19 17:26:02

Sounds like she is jealous. Do they have any children.

werideatdawn Tue 23-Apr-19 17:26:52

Yanbu. The "fertility issues give you a free pass to be an unpleasant dick" brigade will tell you that you are though.
Ignore them, if they can't even behave like decent human beings and say a simple congratulations I wouldn't bother with them.

PanamaPattie Tue 23-Apr-19 17:28:15

They were rude. Don't share anymore information, you only get a pissy reply. She sounds jealous of you. Congratulations by the way.

MsSquiz Tue 23-Apr-19 17:31:39

I don't think you are being unreasonable in wanting a simple "congratulations" from your in laws.

How difficult is it to congratulate your brother/sister and their wife/husband on something that is clearly exciting for them?
It doesn't have to be the centre of your universe, but a hug and a smile or whatever wouldn't go amiss

jellycatspyjamas Tue 23-Apr-19 17:45:19

I can’t believe they did t even say congratulations - surely that’s an automatic response when someone says they’ve got engaged, are pregnant or whatever. It’s not about being super excited about someone else’s pregnancy - it’s common courtesy. I’d be disappointed that they couldn’t even manage that, especially after having a miscarriage.

Waveysnail Tue 23-Apr-19 17:54:55

So mil had prewarned u that they knew?

NoSauce Tue 23-Apr-19 18:02:17

Obviously there’s some history between the two of you?

Ginger1982 Tue 23-Apr-19 18:19:43

YABVU! They could have said congratulations at least but it was completely OTT to text her. You clearly don't like her. Do they have kids? They could be struggling.

HBStowe Tue 23-Apr-19 18:21:38

I think they were a bit rude but that texting them about it was an overreaction. People don’t always get these things right all the time.

NewAccount270219 Tue 23-Apr-19 18:31:35

Yanbu. The "fertility issues give you a free pass to be an unpleasant dick" brigade will tell you that you are though.

What is it that you feel gives you a free pass to be such an unpleasant dick?

IceCreamAndCandyfloss Tue 23-Apr-19 18:37:31

Very rudeness to text that they failed to meet your expectations over your announcement.

I never get the big announcement thing, gender reveal . Nobody else really cares bar maybe the grandparents imo.

whohaa Tue 23-Apr-19 18:43:17

People will always say they knew. I told DHs aunt yesterday. We haven't had any contact with her for months and told her as soon as she walked in the door, yet apparently she already knew. Once you're married and child-bearing age, people will suspect you're pregnant 100% of the time. People have been wrong about it for over 3 years now, yet because I actually am pregnant this time, this means they were clever and 'just knew'. hmm

RosamundDarnley Tue 23-Apr-19 18:51:12

Someone at my work told me they had known ”back in January when you were off sick with that”cold”” when I announced my pregnancy in the October. Considering dd was born in the following April I dread to think what species she thought I was...

Coyoacan Tue 23-Apr-19 19:47:02

What did you hope to achieve with your text, OP? It sounds like you don't like your SIL, so why bother?

We don't have to tell everyone we don't like that we don't like them. I only complain to people I care about, because our relationship is valuable to me and I want to sort out a problem, why fight unnecessarily with someone you don't like and are going to have to see for years to come?

werideatdawn Tue 23-Apr-19 20:23:13

What is it that you feel givesyoua free pass to be such an unpleasant dick?

Weariness with precious people who can't see past themselves to wish well on their families. smile

EnglishRose13 Wed 22-May-19 18:25:17

This is getting ridiculous now...

Buddytheelf85 Wed 22-May-19 18:37:34

‘Announcing’ pregnancies makes me cringe - especially by showing someone a scan picture. They’re your relatives, you tell them like normal human beings, they congratulate you, job done.

You decided to ‘announce’ it to them with a picture because you wanted the maximum amount of attention and impact. And now you’re disappointed and annoyed because they didn’t give you what you wanted. Their reaction was a bit mean but was probably provoked by your obvious desire for attention.

blackcatclocks Wed 22-May-19 18:44:43

@EnglishRose13 the level of attention seeking is pathetic isn't it! I can't believe these people don't have better things to do with their lives!

dayswithaY Wed 22-May-19 19:20:27

Sorry to break it to you but most people don't care. My MIL just rolled her eyes when we told her I was pregnant with her first grandchild. You haven't confirmed whether your SIL has children or not. In that situation, I would assume they were trying for a baby and given her history of being competitive, that she wanted to get pregnant before you. Not your fault of course, but I would have been a bit more low key with my "announcement" in case they were struggling to conceive. You let yourself down with the text though, breezy is the only way to treat these situations. You might want to develop a thicker skin soon as you will discover your child is just one of billions in the world. It will save you a lot of time in the future to know your child is mostly only interesting to you. Congratulations though.

EnglishRose13 Wed 22-May-19 19:37:42

@blackcatclocks

It's just so bizarre. It wouldn't be so bad if the story didn't keep changing! I can't take this as anything more than a wind up now.

Ridiculous.

aIways Wed 22-May-19 23:02:27

Oh my god that netmums post! 👀

goose1964 Wed 22-May-19 23:23:58

I agree that it is quite easy to tell if someone is pregnant. In DDs last pregnancy I knew before it was confirmed due to the constant trips to the loo.

It's possible that as they'd successfully guessed it the actual confirmation was more exciting at that moment than the news you were pregnant.

FIRSTTIMEMUMMA81 Wed 22-May-19 23:27:56

I would be the same. How horrendous not to congratulate you? This is such a special time... poor form. Even worse for BIL to get on at you.

Think they have been trying to get pregnant?

EnglishRose13 Thu 23-May-19 07:19:48

@aIways

The OP posted that in here yesterday, too. Under the same username as this thread. It got deleted.

EightAce Thu 23-May-19 10:41:51

I'll never forget the time we told my parents that we were expecting another (our third) child. Honestly it was like telling them I'd failed all of my A-Levels. We've never really got past that TBH.

Eslteacher06 Thu 23-May-19 16:52:12

I noticed the "reverse" post for this yesterday on here and someone called @catmom2019 out. Then looking on FB I see this again on Netmums! What's all that about?! Just leave it??

SerenDippitty Thu 23-May-19 16:57:16

‘Announcing’ pregnancies makes me cringe - especially by showing someone a scan picture. They’re your relatives, you tell them like normal human beings, they congratulate you, job done.

This. I don’t get the need for all the theatricals.

Eslteacher06 Thu 23-May-19 16:58:15

Sorry I've just noticed it's been shown above!

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