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Expecting couple want people to make their meals and do their chores for them.

(139 Posts)
Aeroflotgirl Sun 21-Apr-19 08:34:10

I read this, and I was gobsmacked, and not just any meals, specific ones requiring expensive ingredients. As If they are the first people to have babies. I think big CF comes to mind here. I know people don't have to give, but some people have a huge front.

SnakesBarmitzvah Sun 21-Apr-19 08:39:06

Yes I think YABU. I’m first time pregnant and nearly all my pregnancy/baby books have advised us to ask visitors to bring with them some food, or to cook something we can freeze. It’s just a practicality, and thinking about what’s actually useful than say... visitors bringing a bunch of flowers or similar.

I didn’t read the article so yes maybe some of the specific meals are difficult, but I believe the sentiment is perfectly reasonable in that heavily pregnant people or new parents are going to have so much already in their plate (no pun intended) that visitors bringing food will be a much welcome and appreciated help! Surely you don’t begrudge that?

Donotunderstandmyhouse Sun 21-Apr-19 08:40:40

In the article though it's strangers they are asking and they also say that people can leave it on the porch so as not to disturb 😳

greatbigwho Sun 21-Apr-19 08:40:58


They're asking people they don't know though - it's a post on a local community group asking for specific meals and for people to come and clean for them

Gabrielknight Sun 21-Apr-19 08:42:10

When I read it I thought the CF!!! As they are asking strangers! And the bit about not being up to visitors that they can leave the meal In the cooler outside was a bit hmm.

greatbigwho Sun 21-Apr-19 08:42:39

For those who don't want to read the Daily Mail, here's a link to the original twitter thread

SnakesBarmitzvah Sun 21-Apr-19 08:42:41

OK just read it and yeah, that particular couple are CF, but still think that food/help with household chores is likely to be a big help to new parents than visitors bringing gifts or nothing at all

SetPhasersTaeMalkie Sun 21-Apr-19 08:42:47

It was pretty funny. They seemed to be asking their neighbours and strangers to be contributing. And to put the food in a cool box so they are not disturbed. Seems a bit much!! 😯

CigarsofthePharoahs Sun 21-Apr-19 08:47:34

A friend organised a meal rota for me when I had my second child.
I appreciated every meal. Every meal.
However our dietary requirements were "food". We didn't put up a list of wanky recipes or expect people to put it in a box in the garden because we couldn't be arsed to open the door.
We didn't expect total strangers to do anything. In fact we didn't "expect" anyone to do anything, but after a nightmare delivery and a week in hospital to recover it was so nice to feel cared for.
These two are making a mockery out of it.

cliquewhyohwhy Sun 21-Apr-19 08:52:49

Ffs it's not hard to prepare food and have a baby! Many people have done it and will continue to do it including myself!

Aeroflotgirl Sun 21-Apr-19 09:00:14

snakes most of us manage, dh and I were on our own, his parents and family abroad, my elderly mum, 50 miles away. In this day and age, it is very easy to obtain food: you can order pre prepared meals online, order menu with specific ingredients for certain food, or batch prepare easy meals such as: stew, spaghetti bolognaise, curry, chilli concarne. Or just head to the Supermarket to stock up on ready meals for a short period. I would never dream of doing what these people are doing, I would be too embarrassed.

If close family and friends wanted to cook us meals, anything would be welcome.

Aeroflotgirl Sun 21-Apr-19 09:02:02

Cigarsofthe that is totally different, and you don't sound like them at all. I agree with you.

Nuttyaboutnutella Sun 21-Apr-19 09:04:19

It's the whole "we have very specific requirements with food because we are Paleo, here is a link to recipes" as if they are doing people a favour, not the other way around.

I'm due my second baby nett month. I spent most of my day yesterday making a load of meals for the freezer and will also stock up on other bits from the supermarket.

Get a grip and cook your own meals.

Hellbentwellwent Sun 21-Apr-19 09:05:49

Jaysus what utter knobs. However, god love them now it’s gone viral, the shame!

Aeroflotgirl Sun 21-Apr-19 09:06:16

The husband sounds like he is very hard work, the food requirements are mainly from him. Lazy arse can't he knock up a curry or spaghetti bolognaise. Ahhhh they don't want to pay for their expensive tastes, they want others to fund it. I am just shocked at the sheer gall of some people.

CaptainBrickbeard Sun 21-Apr-19 09:06:43

Who would want to eat something dropped off by a stranger and left in your outdoor cooler anyway? They advertised this widely on social media; it seems like an invitation for food poisoning! Like most people, I batch cooked before my first baby was born (forgot to label anything so we ate ‘chef’s surprise’ for a fortnight!) I feel a little bit sorry for anyone whose stupidity goes viral but this is ridiculous.

Soubriquet Sun 21-Apr-19 09:07:33

What have I just read?!!!!

They couldn’t be more precious if they tried

Faithless12 Sun 21-Apr-19 09:08:10

@SnakesBarmitzvah Yabu for not reading the article. Asking your mum or best friend if they could bring a meal is different to asking random strangers to bring a very specific meal. Be happy with what you get.

EncroachingLoaf Sun 21-Apr-19 09:10:49

Why can't HE cook some fucking meals? It's not exactly as if he's going to be recovering from giving birth or trying to breastfeed is it. How embarassing. confused

user1493413286 Sun 21-Apr-19 09:12:57

Yikes they took that a bit far! Having said that it was great when people brought us meals over. My mil stocked our fridge with easy to make meals and ready meals although I can’t eat ready made cottage pie any more after eating so much at the time

user1493413286 Sun 21-Apr-19 09:13:47

It was actually more useful when DH was back at work as then when he came in I could hand him DD and get some rest without him having to then think about cooking dinner

Passthecherrycoke Sun 21-Apr-19 09:16:19

Ha ha. What a couple of socially inept attention seekers.

It’s totally different if people bring you meals but asking them? I’d be embarrassed that I was so incapable One of us couldn’t knock up some food or a ready meal whilst a newborn was in the house shock

SinkGirl Sun 21-Apr-19 09:17:28

I was part of a pregnancy forum that was mainly Americans and the whole meal train thing is quite a big thing over there. Dropping food off is quite a common thing for friends and family or neighbours to do when someone has a baby, or surgery or illness. People want to help but don’t know how, so this is a great way of doing it.

Usually it is like making an extra lasagne, making extra casserole or something. This is pretty extreme. Part of me respects people who can be straight up about what they want, but this is a bit much.

We had twins, an emergency section, both twins in NICU for two weeks, then one at home and one in hospital for six weeks, then a week at home, then DH at home with one baby while I was in HDU with the other baby for a fortnight. No family help, no friends to help, no meals delivered. We ate a lot of takeaways (or didn’t eat, more accurately).

Would it have been lovely? Absolutely. Would I ever make something like this with such specific requests? Fuck no.

Margotshypotheticaldog Sun 21-Apr-19 09:18:22

That's what I wondered too encroaching loaf. If he's one of those "we are pregnant" men, then I guess he also believes "we" will need time to recover from the birth whilst "we" establish breastfeeding. She should heed the warning, he's acknowledging from the get go how utterly useless he plans to be.

TheFairyCaravan Sun 21-Apr-19 09:19:24

What a complete twat.

I was bed bound and in and out of hospital from 26 weeks with severe SPD when I was pregnant with DS2. We were miles away from family but we still managed to eat. It wasn't always great because DH was still having to work but it kept us going. DS2 turned up on Christmas Eve and we managed to feed ourselves over that period too.

That bloke needs to pull his big boys pants up and crack on with it.

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