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To think that my daughter isn’t well

(91 Posts)
mumto3xxx Sun 21-Apr-19 07:26:17

I have posted about my daughter previously. She is 23 and has autism and other special needs also. Recently there has been a huge change in her and I don’t think she is well (I don’t know what’s wrong but she just isn’t herself). She has become quite depressed suddenly- she cries all the time and has the most unbelievable meltdowns (we are used to these with her autism but the ones she’s been having recently are by far so much worse than we’ve ever seen- she will sit crying and screaming and talking about harming herself), she is having barely any sleep (she has never slept that well but is on melatonin but recently this has made no difference). Her periods are also very irregular and she will only have one every few months. She is also very constipated and as a result of this she is quite uncomfortable and often in pain (her diet is not fantastic but it’s not awful in that it would cause terrible constipation- she does eat quite a lot of fibre). She is arguing with everyone at the moment and really causing a lot of problems in our family. She also has quite bad hot flushes and becomes quite flustered (I realise that this may be due to her autism though). In the last two weeks she has seen her psychiatrist and three different gps and I have expressed these concerns to all of them but they feel they are just manifestations of her autism and I think that they think I am just being an over worried parent. I was just wondering if people think I am being unreasonable to think there is something more wrong with her and also what I can do next as I am really stuck. Thank you x

mumto3xxx Sun 21-Apr-19 07:33:41

Also, I forgot to mention that she complains about feeling sick a lot of the time!

Emilizz34 Sun 21-Apr-19 08:01:01

I’m sorry to see that you’re all having a very tough time. Is there any possibility that she could be pregnant?
Did the GP do a pregnancy test or run any blood tests to check for medical conditions or hormone imbalances ?

Petalflowers Sun 21-Apr-19 08:06:21

My first thoughts were pregnancy or early menopause!

Also, as Emil says, has any blood tests been taken to check for imbalances etc? Or urine tested for UTI as that can alter someone’s personality?

Definitely if there has been a noticeable change in her behaviour it needs investigating.

mumto3xxx Sun 21-Apr-19 08:34:31

Thank you so much for your replies! @petalflowers she’s definitely not pregnant! The early menopause did cross my mind but I read that it’s very rare and is usually only in people who have had relatives who’ve had it and no one in our family’s had it. Also, she does still have periods- just very infrequently now- could it still be early menopause if she still is having some periods? The three gps I saw said she looks well, just a little tired and when I asked for a blood test they said to wait a few more months to see if she gets any better!

mumto3xxx Sun 21-Apr-19 08:37:08

@Emilizz34 thank you so much for your kind reply! The gps said if there was an underlying medical condition it would be likely that she would be portraying as more ill- whereas she just looks tired now they say!

JellySlice Sun 21-Apr-19 08:40:06

Is her constipation being treated?

Chronic constipation can cause a lot if vague problematic issues from the constant discomfort and inability to get rid of waste.

JellySlice Sun 21-Apr-19 08:40:27

Including feeling sick.

endofthelinefinally Sun 21-Apr-19 08:42:04

She might feel better if you deal with the constipation - at least that would be a start. Chronic constipation does cause abdominal pain and nausea as well as disturbed sleep.
Would she take something like movicol, or a gentle laxative?

The other symptoms do sound like perimenopause.

BottleOfJameson Sun 21-Apr-19 08:44:58

I wondered whether the constipation could be causing it? Is she on movocol? Sounds really difficult op. Do you think it could be stress related?

JellySlice Sun 21-Apr-19 08:46:46

The gps said if there was an underlying medical condition it would be likely that she would be portraying as more ill- whereas she just looks tired now they say!

Huh! One of my dc was recently hospitalised with a severe and dangerous infection, which was only identified because I pushed and fussed. Nobody believed that dc was as ill as they were, because they did not appear to be in enough pain and didn't present as ill, just a bit tired.

Dc is almost fully recovered now. Sometimes it is right to be pushy and irritating.

swingofthings Sun 21-Apr-19 08:49:44

I too thought of the perimenopause before reading other posts. If not perimenopause, some form of hormonal imbalance.

Emilizz34 Sun 21-Apr-19 08:51:52

Mumto3xxx you say she’s definitely not pregnant . Has she done at test ? It’s just that I’ve been a nurse /midwife for over 30 years and have lost count of the parents who said that their dds were definitely not pregnant . I don’t mean this in a sarcastic way . I hope that you get things sorted . You know your dd best. You know that she’s just not herself so don’t let any doctor fob you off

QOD Sun 21-Apr-19 08:53:43

How’s her weight? Has it changed at all? Sounds indicative of a thyroid issue maybe?
Either over or under active or
Fluctuating

Or PCOS? Does she suffer with facial hair?

Poor girl. Is there maybe a practice nurse you can book in with for blood tests?
Talk to the receptionist? See if you can kinda bypass the gp or maybe look at changing practices

Zzz1234 Sun 21-Apr-19 08:54:19

Has her thyroid been tested. I had some similar symptoms, feeling unwell, depression and irregular periods and was diagnosed as under active.

FrancesFryer Sun 21-Apr-19 08:54:55

whereas she just looks tired now they say!

I was "just" tired right before i was diagnosed with a disease which could have killed me. Seriously doctors are hard work sometimes

mumto3xxx Sun 21-Apr-19 09:02:48

@Emilizz34 thank you for your further reply! No don’t worry a lot of people have asked me if she could be pregnant recently because of her moods and crying all the time. I am almost certain she’s not because she is supervised the majority of the time- however I realise she is 23 now and perhaps it may be a subject that I need to discuss with her!

mumto3xxx Sun 21-Apr-19 09:04:17

@zzz1234 thank you for your reply! No they haven’t tested for thyroid problems- she matches a fair few of the symptoms of an under active thyroid but she definitely hasn’t put on weight so I’m not sure!

FVFrog Sun 21-Apr-19 09:04:38

I echo pp. You know and live with your daughter, listen to your mother’s instincts. It may be something as simple as the constipation but you know something’s not right so go back until you’re heard, sorry it’s so challenging for you to get appropriate investigations flowers from fellow mother of an autistic DD

rhnireland205 Sun 21-Apr-19 09:06:39

Yep I'd definitely think thyroid issues too. Even a mild imbalance can cause huge issues

SheldonandMama Sun 21-Apr-19 09:12:29

Trust your instincts, as pp said. It really does sound like hormonal/endocrine issues with the constipation being one culprit of her physical discomfort.

junebirthdaygirl Sun 21-Apr-19 09:17:23

It's very strange that doctors haven't done straight forward blood tests as that would eliminate or highlight certain things immediately. Seems to always be their first reaction so not sure why not this time.

Booboostwo Sun 21-Apr-19 09:19:50

Have they done any tests at all? If an NT woman presented with irregular periods, mood swings and constipation I would like to think they would check a couple of things before putting it down to her personality!

Pasithea Sun 21-Apr-19 09:24:05

My best friends adopted daughter has asbergers she complains of this all the time . Started when she was a teenager still going on now in her 30 s. Medical checks done they have put it done to her bad diet and Aspergers. Her diet is due to the autism part. It seems that it all goes hand in hand. She has a medicine phobia to which doesnt help. Sorry but in our experience it is manifestation of autism and asberghers

Hecateh Sun 21-Apr-19 09:24:27

I would push for blood tests for thyroid, anaemia, vit D, vitB12, full blood count.
Blood tests can tell an awful lot. Also ask for a print out of the blood results because if she is borderline on any doctors seem to think that is fine whilst it often isn't.
Supplements definitely help if there are any issues there

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