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AIBU to ask what your “rules” would be?

(22 Posts)
JudgeRindersMinder Fri 12-Apr-19 13:01:05

Both sensible and ridiculous rules welcome!

DH and I are going away for a short holiday, leaving the kids behind for the 1st time EVER.
Teen is very nearly 17 and generally quite sensible, with decent mates, has recently started going out at weekends where alcohol is involved, but hasn’t been daft about it.
Eldest doesn’t live at home but has agreed to stay over for a couple of nights, close relative lives very nearby. I think my concerns are not so much about what teen may do, but if word gets out that we’re away.

I don’t want to “lay down the law”, and the only rules I’ve come up with so far

Don’t piss the neighbours off with noise etc
Walk the dog
I want the house to be in pretty much the same state I left it

How have you dealt with going away and leaving teens?

Horsemenoftheaclopalypse Fri 12-Apr-19 13:12:10

Good rules.

I’d add...
Do not put yourself in hospital or do anything illegal

Horsemenoftheaclopalypse Fri 12-Apr-19 13:12:46

(I don’t have them... but I was a fucking nightmare one) wink

Boboo18 Fri 12-Apr-19 13:14:26

No house parties although when i was a teen i wouldnt of listened grin

CalmDownPacino Fri 12-Apr-19 13:16:09

I think those are good rules. We left 16yo for first time overnight and had similar rules. The only other one was not having people in the house without asking first.

fleshmarketclose Fri 12-Apr-19 13:21:15

Mine was don't do anything that means my neighbour (friend) over the road needs to come and speak to you about it. Dc found said neighbour incredibly scary because she is quite the opposite of me and so they would avoid her wrath at all costs. Never ever had a problem and left one, two or all of them at home on occasion.

PatrickMerricksGoshawk Fri 12-Apr-19 13:22:45

I read on here recently “don’t do anything that will make me look like a bad parent if I have to hold a press conference” (obviously it won’t come to that, you will have a lovely holiday and DC will be fine!)

wellhonestly Fri 12-Apr-19 13:23:40

I would be tempted to say: Don't have people round. If that's too draconian: Don't have groups of people round. Do the dishes and wipe up the kitchen surfaces.

Make sure your close relative knows your timings and is happy for the DCs to contact them if there's a problem (we had a burst pipe last time I was away).

Also it's good to let the neighbours know the youngsters are "home alone" and good that the kids know they know ..!

notacooldad Fri 12-Apr-19 13:28:09

We went away when DS was 16, nearly 17 for a long weekend. I just said that we didn't come back to a shit tip.
It was obvious due to the takeaway wrappings in the bin DS1's girlfriend had moved in for the weekend but the place was immaculate,
They had plated up a meal for us and had made cakes and bread!!
It was weird!

LoadOfUtterBoswellocks Fri 12-Apr-19 13:32:20

"Whatever differences there are between how the house is and what it has in it NOW and what it's like when we get back, you pay for"

InsertFunnyUsername Fri 12-Apr-19 13:33:23

When i was left alone for the first time, My rules were.

Dont shout from the rooftops you're home alone. Feed the animals. House to be the same as when i left. Here are the emergency numbers (family lived close by anyway) And switch the cooker off after use grin

OnlyFoolsnMothers Fri 12-Apr-19 13:34:18

Dont let people know on your social media that you are by yourselves!

JudgeRindersMinder Fri 12-Apr-19 13:49:05

*”don’t do anything that will make me look like a bad parent if I have to hold a press conference”

Absolutely LOVING this one. 😂😂😂😂

brizzlemint Fri 12-Apr-19 13:50:43

Ask your DS what he thinks the rules should be and come up with them together, he's more likely to stick to them then and you can get a feel for what he thinks he might get away with.

Jamieson90 Fri 12-Apr-19 14:10:19


Honestly teens are stupid. It's not their fault, they're like big toddlers at that age! grin

You're taking your life house into your own hands. Or more accurately .... their hands...

thefuriousfuggler Fri 12-Apr-19 15:32:07

If the beautifully colour co-ordinated dining room rug does happen to catch fire, don't think that you can swap it with the tatty, stained (not to mention totally different size and colour) one from your room and that nobody will notice.

SundayShawl Fri 12-Apr-19 15:42:19

My usual list for DSD:

1) Don't burn the house down
2) No, you can't blow it up instead
3) No you can't have a gun in case of burglers
4) Or a chainsaw...
5) Or a baseball bat...
6) No loud parties
7) Don't do anything illegal
8) If you must do something illegal don't get caught
9) Don't die

Thinking about it perhaps 9 should be higher up the list...

JudgeRindersMinder Fri 12-Apr-19 18:48:42

@SundayShawl these are fab, especially 7 and 8😂

BuzzPeakWankBobbly Fri 12-Apr-19 18:52:17

Tell them that <trusted relative/neighbour> has your permission to pop over unannounced at any time, so bear that in mind when planning...

GeorgieTheGorgeousGoat Fri 12-Apr-19 18:59:55

I don’t leave them overnight yet as they are a little younger but a rule with my teenagers is answer my calls/ messages!!

bridgetreilly Fri 12-Apr-19 19:00:58

No one in the house you don't know, i.e. no friends of friends, no open invitations on social media.

JudgeRindersMinder Sun 14-Apr-19 11:55:30

This is what the list is looking like...a couple of serious instructions with a few tongue in cheek thrown in, it will be posted on the kitchen chalkboard when we go grin

Do not put yourself in hospital or do anything illegal

If you must do something illegal, don’t get caught

Don’t do anything that’ll make me look like a bad parent if I have to hold a press conference (this is my favourite)

Feed and walk the dog

Don’t piss the neighbours off

Don’t do anything that means your auntie across the road has to come and speak to you about it (because I’d never hear the bloody end of it🙄)

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