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To ask how old you were?

(587 Posts)
HarrysOwl Fri 12-Apr-19 07:35:33

When you got married? (If you're married!)

I was reading a BBC article about a woman talking about the judgement and negativity she encountered when she announced her engagement aged 22.

I was 32 when I married DH. We were together for 3 years, got engaged then lived together for another 4 years before having our wedding. I wanted to be as sure as I could be and felt no rush.

Is there a general judgement with feminist overtones about getting married so young? Are they doomed to divorce?

JoeMaplin Fri 12-Apr-19 07:50:37

23. Been together since I was 18. (21 years this year)

BobbinThreadbare123 Fri 12-Apr-19 07:51:06

I was 23 the first time round and 33 the second time. No particular judgement either way from anyone, either time. XH same age as me and DH ~5 years older. I did know a few people who married while we were all at uni together ie at 20/21 years old. We thought it a bit odd but sometimes it was for religious reasons.

HippyChickMama Fri 12-Apr-19 07:52:02

Met when I was 19, engaged at 21, married at 25. He's 2.5 years older than me and we've been married 15 years this year. Looking back I guess it does seem young but we'd been living together for 5 years before we got married and didn't have first dc until 3 years after marriage.

JuniorAsparagus Fri 12-Apr-19 07:52:21

Married at 22, still together 45 years later. A lot of people seemed to get married straight after College/University at that time and no one batted an eyelid.
DSis got married at 18, still together 44 years later.

NotMyUsualTopBilling Fri 12-Apr-19 07:54:36

I was 27. Been married 5 years now.

Together 13 years beforehand.

Idontmeanto Fri 12-Apr-19 07:55:24

I married at 25. Eldest daughter tells me she can’t imagine it as she “won’t be done with life!” We’re still married but it’s not the healthiest of relationships and I wish I’d grown up a bit more first.

echt Fri 12-Apr-19 07:57:30

39. I would view 22 as young but then everyone I know well was at university during those years, so guess that's part of it.

ZigZagIntoTheBlue Fri 12-Apr-19 07:59:14

Met at 19 married at 25

elliejjtiny Fri 12-Apr-19 08:00:07

Met when I was 19, married at 22. Happily married for nearly 15 years.

LorelaiRoryEmily Fri 12-Apr-19 08:00:42

Met at 26, engaged at 30, married at 33. We were supposed to get married a year earlier but got pregnant and postponed

Cwtches123 Fri 12-Apr-19 08:01:26

I was 19 and we were married for 16 years. Age was not a factor in the marriage failing, that was more due to the pressures of infertility.

Yellowcar2 Fri 12-Apr-19 08:04:14

Met at 22 engaged 24 married 26. Now married 8 years with 3 DC.
My parents married at 16 and 18 all DD family were negative about it. They are still married 50 years later and the only sibling from DD family who have not divorced. Although DM always said she would be happy if we married that young.
I'm sure lots of couples that didn't marry young still get divorced.
I guess it's about the individual people and not the age.

JaretsGirlfren Fri 12-Apr-19 08:05:33

I was 19, he was abusive, now happily divorced

MirandaWest Fri 12-Apr-19 08:06:19

Got married at 23. Split up after 11 years married.

Got married for a second time at 40.

mrsed1987 Fri 12-Apr-19 08:06:52

Met at 25, married at 30

MeanMrMustardSeed Fri 12-Apr-19 08:08:36

Met at 25 and married at 25! Was a bit of a whirlwind I suppose, but it just felt right and we’ve got one of the best marriages I know - 15 years later.

Bibijayne Fri 12-Apr-19 08:08:49

Met at 22..totally failed to go out with each other until 30. Married at 32. Baby at 34.

Janleverton Fri 12-Apr-19 08:10:15

Met when 16. Friends. Became a couple when I was 22. Married at 28. Dc at 29, 32 and 36. Married for 17 years now.

PregnantSea Fri 12-Apr-19 08:10:28

23 when we met, 26 when we married (but only a couple of weeks off 27).

No regrets, very happy still.

Everyone is different, some people are ready to marry at 22, some aren't. I think some people think of how they were when they were that age and assume that everyone else was the same but it's not an accurate measure.

nonetcurtains Fri 12-Apr-19 08:10:44

Married at 20, (he was 22), celebrated Ruby anniversary in 2017.

scarbados Fri 12-Apr-19 08:11:14

26 first time round.

61 second time. Second marriage has already lasted 3 times as long as first.

SecondTimeCharm Fri 12-Apr-19 08:12:36

We got together aged 18 and got married at 29 a year after our first child was born, because I decided that although I was against marriage for a lot of reasons, no way was I going to give up work for years to be a sahm and not have any security!

Though it was for practical reasons, we ended up having a great time grin it was almost our 11th anniversary to the day

CostanzaG Fri 12-Apr-19 08:12:46

First marriage -23. We'd been together 5 years. Big white wedding etc.

Second marriage - 32. We'd been together 6 months and we eloped and didn't tell anyone. 6 years later we're happier than ever.

bakebakebake Fri 12-Apr-19 08:13:05

We got together when i was 15 and he was 17.

We married when i was 22.

We had two children by then, but have a third now.

TapasForTwo Fri 12-Apr-19 08:13:41

Met OH when I was 20, married at 22. Still happily married nearly 38 years later. OH is 7 years older than me.

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