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I really envy assertive people

(4 Posts)
Cupppp Mon 08-Apr-19 20:41:51

I know envy isn’t a nice emotion so IABU. I just wish I had the gumption to say what I want. I’m ok at work (to my company’s credit, the culture is very open and there is no “grade-ism” so people can be candid without repercussion).

It’s relationships that’s the problem for me. I honestly think it’s an innate skill and the couples I know with the best relationships communicate frankly with each other. I asked one such friend whether she had ever been reluctant to say something to her husband (or ex boyfriends) because she feared the answer - she looked confused by the question.

I want to tell a friend how I feel about him. We’re very flirty, mostly via messenger. This thread isn’t a “does he want me?” one - Mumsnetters couldn’t say, they don’t know him or me. I’d just like to know what an assertive person would write and how she’d steel herself for a “no thanks” reply.

PlainSpeakingStraightTalking Mon 08-Apr-19 20:44:15

We’re very flirty, mostly via messenger.

Knock ^^ that on the head, get him out IRL and see what the chemistry is like … then lean in and snog him

Sausage01 Mon 08-Apr-19 22:13:41

It just needs a "hey, how about meeting up for a drink (or insert you're own activity here), it would be lovely to see you...". You aren't flinging yourself at him or screaming I love you as it could be interpreted as friendly then see how it goes.

sunshinelollipopsrainbows Mon 08-Apr-19 22:23:01

Actions speak louder than words OP. I'd dial down the messenger a bit and try and see him more in person.

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