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Do you cut yourself slack when on your period?

(62 Posts)
oweus Mon 08-Apr-19 10:39:36

If you are able to

I was just recently diagnosed with endometriosis and really struggle getting through periods. I constantly dread the first day of my period as I know I will be in agony.

Last Friday I had to take the day off when my period came (javelin arse in an open plan office is no joke) and coincidentally had a family friend staying with me (who is closer to my mum's age). She made comments to the effect that I'm not doing myself any favours by wallowing in self-pity etc.

"What do you think women did during the war?"

Over the weekend:
I grazed on chocolate and Nik and Naks
Ordered a couple of takeaways
Stayed in comfy clothes
Did a couple of face masks
Had several naps
Watched more episodes of 4 in a bed than I care to admit
Was a miserable cow
Self-medicated with Peroni

Obviously, I don't do this every weekend. Got a text from my mum this morning basically telling me off! Apparently, I'm young so should be out enjoying my life angry

AIBU?

What do you do to make yourself feel better (still feeling horrendous)?

BillywigSting Mon 08-Apr-19 19:41:26

@Angelicinnocent that's good to hear there is at least one gp willing to listen, sometimes that's all it takes. Best of luck (and much sympathy!) to your dd. The mini pill was literally life changing for me.

DrCristinaYang Mon 08-Apr-19 21:54:53

Yes I definitely cut myself slack as a few days before my period and during I am super emotional, cry and need hugs from those around me blush
I also get severe cramps to the point where I vomit, feel faint and have to lie curled up in a ball.
I leak at least a couple of times per period and have big clots.
So yeah definitely don't feel guilty for allowing yourself to take it easy during that time, especially considering you suffer endometriosis which isn't just a bad period.

IncrediblySadToo Mon 08-Apr-19 22:31:16

Oh come ON OP! Seriously hmm. Just put a mini tampon in, your white trousers on and cycle to work, with a swim afterwards.

🙄

Ignore your family friend (who I assume won’t be getting another invite), your ridiculously daft mother & all of the ‘I have 6 kids, 3 jobs, play tennis and don’t let a mere period stop me’.

I used to have very light periods, then went on the pill (back to back) no periods I was the tampon advert girl. But I could still understand that I was fortunate and that others had it FAR worse.

...but holy fuck, when I started having mine again they ramped up into periods from hell. They last ages (12 days) and for the heavy 2-3 days I prefer not to leave the house whenever possible. I max up the san pro to do the school run. I’m lucky I work for myself so I can arrange my day to suit me. If I have to go out it’s dark colours, changes of clothes and planned around where toilets are. My problem now though is they’re so erratic I can’t plan ahead for holidays etc.

...that’s without crippling pain, serious stomach issues, headaches, migraines or anything else. I’m lucky I don’t (yet) suffer any of those.

People who have light periods, then get ‘heavy’ periods, that actually aren’t, CAN be very judgemental because they’ve NO idea how bad it can be. Despite reading threads about it, they still don’t accept that not all periods are equal or that Endo isn’t ‘just a period’

They’re ALL safely ignored.

🌷🍫 to ALL of you who suffer badly, 🍾🥂 to some solutions!

TheNightmareNeighbourNextDoor Tue 09-Apr-19 11:18:12

I'm with you OP - my periods are so bad I can barely get out of bed and they also make me scream.

I have endometriosis and adenomyosis.

I have seen various specialists the only thing that will "cure" me is a total hysterectomy which I am not prepared to do yet because we are trying for children.

The only thing that used to take the edge off was mefenamic acid but I've become allergic to that so whilst I'd like to be able to "pop an ibuprofen and get on with it" it just doesn't happen

So I have a tens machine, pain killers, hot water bottle, hot baths and chill out and spend the day on the sofa/in bed and I do not beat myself up about it or feel guilty!

AwkwardPaws27 Tue 09-Apr-19 14:09:12

I'm undergoing investigations for endo, have been advised to take the combined pill back-to-back to prevent periods... Except I'm now on day 15 of breakthrough bleeding. So fed up.
I don't get proper javelin arse, which sounds excruciating, but it feels tender, occasionally stabby, like I need to go constantly, plus I am oscillating between constipation and loose stools.
I'm eating whatever I want and my best friend is the sofa, I'm also having to make allowances for myself as otherwise I think I'll cry.

HaudYerWheeshtYaWeeBellend Tue 09-Apr-19 14:12:48

No, I’ve just been diagnosed also, as well as an extra thick cervix, and a cervix’s length of 1.9cm, so my period pains are horrific.

However I still try and go about my everyday life as best as I can, there can be days where I am puking due to the pain, however I just try and do as much as I can.

As otherwise I would be wallowing in my own self pity party and tbh it just isn’t me.

HBStowe Tue 09-Apr-19 14:13:03

Endometriosis is no joke, I really feel for you. I get very bad pain, but not so bad that I can’t force myself to crack on with lots of painkillers and a hot water bottle. Endo is a whole other ball game though, and I think that whatever you need to do to get you through it is fine. Lots of people don’t understand chronic illness, but it’s not like you can just choose to put it on hold while you live your life. If only that were possible!

AgentPeggyCarter Tue 09-Apr-19 14:13:29

I tend to cut myself slack the first day. I can’t take time off work (I freelance from home) but day one if I can is hot water bottle at the laptop / whatever snack food I can face eating / no exercise / early night as needed.

Otherwise I just keep on. Have PCOS and heavy periods / pain managed with co-codamol.

AgentPeggyCarter Tue 09-Apr-19 14:14:46

Toddler just sat on my phone! Wanted to add, having endometriosis is a whole different board game and people who don’t get that can cock off. You’re in pain, be gentle on yourself.

HereInMyHead Tue 09-Apr-19 14:19:24

FraAngelico- that sounds horrendous. Can you take tranexamic acid? It stops you from losing so much blood every month. Works for me. Maybe ask your GP if you haven't already do so.

Babdoc Tue 09-Apr-19 14:21:28

I never had the option of slacking off. Widowed single parent with full time job as hospital doctor. But then I never had endometriosis, so I’m certainly not criticising any patients who do need time off.

Siameasy Tue 09-Apr-19 14:29:32

Yanbu
Endo sounds awful. I have fibroids and used to be unable to leave the house on day one, sometimes longer due to flooding.
I’m definitely not myself and not at my best the week before and the first few days
I seem to get baby brain on day one and very arsey the week before (DH would say every week)

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