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Being 2nd fiddle to partners kids activities

(77 Posts)
Catg76 Sun 07-Apr-19 14:58:50

Just looking for others opinions as maybe I'm being demanding or unreasonable? My boyfriend of 8 years (we do not live together BTW). Sees his teenage kids a week night every week and a Fri sat and Sun night every other week, plus any extra nights they ever ask to stay, now my issue atm is I just feel Like I don't know where I fit in anymore, I've always had the view of kids come first as mine do with me but he seems to do more that the average absent dad which in some ways is good, good dad I guess and nice for his kids but atm seems like he never has any time to me to spend with me, he ends up working list Saturdays and every Sunday takes his son to football even though originally when it was agreed his ex would do it every other week, this never happened, he ended up volunteering to coach the football too so even though yes I expect kids come first if they need him but I feeling really pissed off lately that he chooses to go to football training every wed and matches Sunday meani g we never get to go out for day or do anything, but I'm made to reel like the bad guy cos they're his kids and hmax he said today hell spend as much tme with them as he can. He's due to work away all next week, this was our weekend without his kids but as his dad was visiting abroad and staying with him his daughter stayed fri and sat, I said you don't have kids tonight do you (Sunday) as not his weekend and his dad has gone, he said yes his daughter wants to stay as she won't see him in her week night as he's working away (she's 13). It annoyed me as she'd already stayed two extra nights, where as I now won't seem him for over a week, am I being unreasonable to want to be a, priority sometimes, or expect him to make alternative arrangements for football every other week he doesn't have his kids?

lifebegins50 Sun 07-Apr-19 20:05:34

Op, it does feel like he doesn't consider your feelings and does what he likes.

I doubt you will change him, he probably puts himself first, then the children. Has he ever truly been there for you? Does he have your back?

I think the cheating suggest he pushes boundaries

Catg76 Sun 07-Apr-19 21:01:44

His sons mother, he originally said he'd be doing it every other week and she would take him on the alternate weeks

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