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Argument with DH

(36 Posts)
9OhDearMe9 Sat 06-Apr-19 12:50:11

I’ll try not make this too long.

Just had a row with DH over his mum wanting to take our children to her holiday home in the Easter hols. She sprang it on him yesterday saying which days she would take them. I’ve already arranged appts and annual leave etc for the time she would like to take them.
I said to DH that she could have asked when was best (she doesn’t work) and that I think it’s nice she wants to take the kids away, but she could at least have asked if we had any plans rather than thinking we hadn’t.

DH has proper kicked off. He’s told me to fuck off. I told him to fuck off back. He’s then stormed out of the room shouting that I’m fucking bi-polar, I’m a bi-polar bitch and that he never knows where he is with me.

I admit, I do have MH issues - PTSD - but this isn’t problematic at the moment.

This is totally out of character. He’s not normally a sweary/ shouty person. I feel sick that he’s thrown a mental health insult at me as well.

He’s now stormed out and driven off somewhere. I don’t know where as he’s left his phone.

I don’t know what to do.

TotHappy Sat 06-Apr-19 15:21:53

What do you mean, you haven't spoken? You blanked each other or he just came in and acted like everything was fine?

GertrudeCB Sat 06-Apr-19 15:27:42

He should have apologised.

9OhDearMe9 Sat 06-Apr-19 15:28:08

I’m upstairs in the bedroom and he came in and has stayed downstairs.

9OhDearMe9 Sat 06-Apr-19 15:28:59

I feel like I don’t want to go talk to him as I am afraid that he will say things again about my MH and I’m already struggling with it all.

9OhDearMe9 Sat 06-Apr-19 15:29:20

I have no friends in RL. I am very lonely.

CheshireChat Sat 06-Apr-19 15:42:26

It sounds like a really shit situation and I'd be fuming about the comment, but if he's generally supportive I'd ask what's going on.

However, it's absolutely fair to say you found it unforgivable and to expect an apology.

I know you've said you're lonely, is there any particular reason you don't have friends right now? Like no time or opportunities to meet people.

9OhDearMe9 Sat 06-Apr-19 15:55:22

I’m busy with work and when I changed jobs I kind of drifted away from my old friends (we worked together). It was natural really - we all ended up getting married, having kids etc and as time passed we slowly stopped seeing each other.

Now I just don’t feel I have anything of interest to offer anyone, so I wouldn’t even know how to make any new friends.

ZippyBungleandGeorge Sat 06-Apr-19 16:12:08

OP if I stormed out and came in and DH was upstairs I'd assume he rightly didn't want to speak to me. If he's not like this usually he might be feeling very sheepish. Is it worth going to get a drink or something? He might take it as opportunity to apologise. What he has said to you is unacceptable.

CheshireChat Sat 06-Apr-19 16:26:34

I sincerely doubt you have nothing interesting to offer flowers, it's hard.

sackrifice Sat 06-Apr-19 16:28:47

Can you let her take them, leave him to rearrange the appointments and take the necessary annual leave to facilitate this, and go see your old friends on the days that you have leave booked?

Cherrysoup Sat 06-Apr-19 16:33:12

I would talk to the mil and say that she can’t have them on those days and say she needs to talk to you if you’re doing the wife work of appointments etc. Next holiday, let your dh take the time off and make the appointments. Is he in the FOG? Does he always prioritise his mum over you? Why didn’t he just ask you before acceding to her demands?

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