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To be furious that DS and friends have drawn on faces with sharpie at sleepover

(825 Posts)
peoplepleaser1 Sat 06-Apr-19 09:13:39

Yesterday was DS' 12th birthday. He had 6 friends sleep overnight.

They've been no trouble but I've got up this morning to find they've drawn on the faces of two sleeping friends with sharpie whilst they were asleep.

They have drawn moustaches, bushy eyebrows and cheek roses. I've tried to remove it with them but it's still quite visible. Both kids have quite pale skin which has made it even more visible.

I'm mortified, and upset and angry that DS let this happen under our roof. I was responsible for these kids and I feel terrible that they did this.

I've told DS to carry on as normal and that I'll deal with him once they've all gone home.

I'm not usually very strict and DS is usually a good kid but I'm really annoyed with him- well with all of them tbh but it's not my place to do anything about that.

DS is going to his dads tonight, we aren't together. I have mentioned it to him and he has said I'm ridiculous and overreacting. I planned to ban DS from electronics for a couple of days but his Dad has said he won't back me up so I can't do that.

AIBU and overreacting?!

Jessgalinda Sat 06-Apr-19 09:16:19

I wouldn't be furious no.

I would tell them that's not s good idea and a cruel joke and that the parents of the boys who have been drawn on wont be happy.

I would make it clear to ds, when they have all gone that nothing like that is too happened again and how would he feel if they had done it to him.

Then leave it.

Northernparent68 Sat 06-Apr-19 09:17:09

Yes, you re overreacting.
It’s the sort of things kids do, no harm done.

MsVestibule Sat 06-Apr-19 09:17:54

I think the other boy's parents are going to be even more angry than you are! Honestly, I'd be fuming if I arrived to collect my son from a sleepover and that had happened. How long will it take to come off?

Regarding your son, did he feel pressurised into doing/allowing this? In your situation, I'd feel an electronics ban for a couple of days was justified but it is up to you to mete these consequences out, not his dad.

lottiebel123 Sat 06-Apr-19 09:18:39

it really is no big deal in the great scheme of things....(wait till you have older teens, voice of bitter experience here)

Unihorn Sat 06-Apr-19 09:19:03

I think this is an overreaction. At 12 they probably could've done worse pranks.

TheLightSideOfTheMoon Sat 06-Apr-19 09:19:20

My mate and I drew on each other in Sharpie while drunk.

Both pale AF, baby oil and a good wash will get it off.

Luckily we had no plans the next day.

Slowknitter Sat 06-Apr-19 09:19:35

It's pretty silly, but hardly a disaster. You are overreacting.

Jessgalinda Sat 06-Apr-19 09:19:57

How long will it take to come off?

In my experience a couple days. I used oil when I got sharpie all on my hands. It faded it loads. Did the oil again the next day and it was gone.

GummyGoddess Sat 06-Apr-19 09:20:04

I do think it's a bit of an overreaction, we used to do this when I was a teenager as 'punishment' for falling asleep too early. It was never meant with any malice and the boy or girl (once me) find it more amusing than anything else.

Were the boys upset?

Georgiemcgeorgeface Sat 06-Apr-19 09:21:32

Oh let them be they're having a laugh. Btw I found makeup wipes extremely effective at removing a giant knob drawn on my sons face in sharpie at the end of term smile

Candleglow7475 Sat 06-Apr-19 09:22:07

Have you tried to get it off with some eye make up remover?
I’d be cross too but it is just a childish prank.

peoplepleaser1 Sat 06-Apr-19 09:22:25

Yes the boys are upset. I don't blame them, they look quite ridiculous.

I now feel guilty as so many posters have said I'm overreacting. I can't help feeling upset and angry.

I fully expect their parents to be very annoyed.

BarbarianMum Sat 06-Apr-19 09:23:09

I'd roll my eyes a lot and give them a bit of a bollocking but I wouldnt be furious. It sounds exactly the sort of thing that happens on sleepovers. Ds1 once woke up and found they'd coated him in toothpaste (at least that washed off I guess).

MariaNovella Sat 06-Apr-19 09:23:28

You are right to be concerned as it is really important that children learn early on that assaulting others in their sleep is definitely not all right.

At 13 I went on a school trip where we stayed in a dorm in a youth hostel. I was assaulted in my sleep. The children who did this should have known better.

nelsonmuntzslingshot Sat 06-Apr-19 09:23:39

Hair spray on a cotton pad will get it off

IWouldPreferNotTo Sat 06-Apr-19 09:24:39

I see they're getting practice in for university.

I can see how it could come off as bullying if it was only two who were drawn on and that's what I'd focus on.

If it was everyone then it's good natured just two looks a bit like picking on them

BarbarianMum Sat 06-Apr-19 09:25:06

Well if the boys are upset then your ds needs to be apologising profusely. My d's would be pretty upset if they'd genuinely upset a friend. You could make him explain and apologise to their parents too.

SwimmingKaren Sat 06-Apr-19 09:25:18

This is exactly the sort of thing that used to happen at sleepovers tbf. If my sons came home in that state at 12, we would all have a good laugh at it rather than be concerned? I don’t think you need to worry.

SwimmingKaren Sat 06-Apr-19 09:26:41

Ah just sent that the boys are upset. If they’re not just upset because you’re cross and the others are potentially in trouble then that changes things. I assumed a friends messing around kind of scenario.

CherryPavlova Sat 06-Apr-19 09:26:49

It will be laughed about for years to come by all involved. Twelve year old boys do silly things. It’s part of the joy of twelve year old boys who stop us taking life too seriously.
Parents might be mildly irritated but not with you. Unless there is a suggestion that the ‘victims’ are frequently subjected to physical harm or ridicule, I’d leave as a lesson to be learned.

Siameasy Sat 06-Apr-19 09:28:42

I wouldn’t care - I’d have a good old laugh. It’s nothing to worry about OP.

LegoPiecesEverywhere Sat 06-Apr-19 09:28:54

Would lemon juice work? It works for red wine stains

Unihorn Sat 06-Apr-19 09:29:40

@MariaNovella hmm

MariaNovella Sat 06-Apr-19 09:30:12

Why do posters think it is OK to laugh at assault?

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