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Friends wants me to pay towards her hotel room,aibu not too?

(315 Posts)
lisaandpop Fri 05-Apr-19 12:35:38

Me and two friends and her 14 year old daughter are going to London on Sunday night to see a show.
My friend booked two twin rooms at £80 per room.
I thought great that's £40 each for me and my friend.
My other friend has turned around and said that's around £53.50 each.
I said it's only £40 each for me and my friend as the room is £80
She has said two rooms is £160 so that's £160 shared 3 ways.
Aibu to think this is a bit cheeky?

TildaTurnip Fri 05-Apr-19 12:37:24

Two people in each room? Each pays half the room cost and the parent pays the teenager’s share if not able to themself.

MrsMoastyToasty Fri 05-Apr-19 12:38:09

Definitely £40. The 14 year old is going to be taking up a bed so that's 4 people.

Hoplittlebunnies Fri 05-Apr-19 12:38:10

Very cheeky.

If you had booked your own rooms, you and one friend would have booked an £80 room to share and split the cost, whereas other friend would need to book a room to accommodate her and her teen daughter. Not sure why you or your first friend should sub a 14 year old!

lisaandpop Fri 05-Apr-19 12:38:14

Yeah it's me and my friend in one room
Other friend and her daughter in the other.

ScreamingValenta Fri 05-Apr-19 12:38:59

YANBU. Why on earth should you pay for her daughter's room? It should be split four ways, with the daughter counting as a fourth, meaning her mum would cover that cost.

Traveler001 Fri 05-Apr-19 12:39:18

Hahahahahahaha no.

doodlejump1980 Fri 05-Apr-19 12:39:28

Cheeky. Room cost should be divided between 4.

DonnaDarko Fri 05-Apr-19 12:39:41

She's doing it based on the number of households not the number of people.

I would do it by the number of people, so that's 40 per person and she has to pay for her daughter

YouCantBeSadHoldingACupcake Fri 05-Apr-19 12:39:47

Very cheeky!! Why should you pay for someone else's teenager

Hollowvictory Fri 05-Apr-19 12:39:51

No you and your friend split the cost of your room.

ScreamingValenta Fri 05-Apr-19 12:40:16

Is this on the grounds that a party of three would have needed two twin rooms anyway?

Readytogogogo Fri 05-Apr-19 12:40:28

Very cheeky.

lisaandpop Fri 05-Apr-19 12:40:34

I mean we are obviously splitting petrol cos 3 ways but the room was a bit of a no no.
We don't know whether to just pay to save the hassle.

FinallyFluid Fri 05-Apr-19 12:40:55

(') << cheeky

BuffaloCauliflower Fri 05-Apr-19 12:41:20

Yeh she’s a CF. You’re not responsible for paying for her daughter, she is. You’re paying your fair share.

cees Fri 05-Apr-19 12:41:27

Absolutely no way should you pay for the 14 yr old. Tell your friends you are not paying and don't back down, cheeky fucker

lisaandpop Fri 05-Apr-19 12:41:26

@ScreamingValenta we would of got the triple room if my friends daughter wasn't coming..or the family room.

Ilikethinkingupnewnames Fri 05-Apr-19 12:41:40

Yes nu. Are you going to be splitting dinner and the show tickets three ways?

Hoppinggreen Fri 05-Apr-19 12:41:54

Nope, charge is per room
My uncle used to do this whenever we went out for meals - him and 6tft son with a bottomless pit of a stomach counted as one person apparently

flumpybear Fri 05-Apr-19 12:42:29

Cheeky cow!
I'd be blunt - sorry but if your daughter comes you need to pay for her yourself

sparepantsandtoothbrush Fri 05-Apr-19 12:42:44

What did you say to her?? Absolutely don't pay for the daughter. Bonkers!

notharryssally Fri 05-Apr-19 12:42:47

You've got to admire her cheek 😂 Of course you only pay for your own room.

notharryssally Fri 05-Apr-19 12:43:06

What does your other friend think?

lisaandpop Fri 05-Apr-19 12:44:46

My other friend thinks she is a cheeky mare too.

BloodsportForAll Fri 05-Apr-19 12:45:50

C. F.
Total CF.
Refuse.

cabcab Fri 05-Apr-19 12:46:18

She needs to give her head a wobble!!

DantesInferno Fri 05-Apr-19 12:46:46

say "are you expecting me to pay some of the daughters ticket for the show as well???"

FoxSquadKitten Fri 05-Apr-19 12:47:53

We don't know whether to just pay to save the hassle.

Err no, cheeky moo.

ChandelierSail Fri 05-Apr-19 12:48:43

we would of got the triple room if my friends daughter wasn't coming..or the family room.

In that case SHE owes YOU money! One third of a triple or family room would be less than half a twin room. So by bringing her daughter you're already paying more than if the DD hadn't come.

And then she's asking you for even more!

She's a proper CF! Tell her where to go!

MadameAnchou Fri 05-Apr-19 12:48:47

Haahaa! Not a chance in hell unless her 14-year-old is invisible. Very simple. 'Per bed. 4 ways. £40. Sorted.' and then she gets FA else. Hate bullying twats like this.

Hollowvictory Fri 05-Apr-19 12:48:56

Just reply, I think you've made an error with the calculations. It's 80 per room so friend and I owe you 40 each

managedmis Fri 05-Apr-19 12:50:06

Your kid, your cost.

Simple.

PlainSpeakingStraightTalking Fri 05-Apr-19 12:50:44

Your friend is 'coming it' ... nah - she pays for one room (her and DD) and you and the other friend pay 50% (£40) each of the second room

DarlingNikita Fri 05-Apr-19 12:50:48

Spell it out. ' The cost is £160. There's four people in two rooms. £160 split four ways is £40 per person. I pay £40, friend pays £40, you pay £40 for you and £40 for your DD. now fuck off'

managedmis Fri 05-Apr-19 12:51:23

This sounds a bit crap actually, will she expect you to pay for her daughters food etc?

notharryssally Fri 05-Apr-19 12:51:39

Are you going to refuse?

managedmis Fri 05-Apr-19 12:51:45

Splitting bills 3 ways instead of four etc.

Twotome Fri 05-Apr-19 12:53:26

Please don’t just pay it to save hassle - the only person that would be causing any hassle is the CF, not you and your friend.

Smartieshavetheanswer Fri 05-Apr-19 12:54:51

How close a friend is she?
You have two options:

1. Pay up and seethe
2. Tell her now.

She may sulk and be silly about it but stick to your guns.

VanGoghsDog Fri 05-Apr-19 12:55:45

Oh, I had this with a meal out and drinks once - "we split the bill between the adults" 15 people there, only 8 to split the bill between. Er, no. I don't have any kids. I'll just pay my own, thanks!

Treaclepie19 Fri 05-Apr-19 12:56:49

I agree with pp. I think you need to challenge it now before she decides meals need to be split 3 ways too.

Farmerswifey12 Fri 05-Apr-19 12:56:58

Haha nice try!

Definately just £40, by that logic does she want to split the price of tickets 3 ways also?

IwantedtobeEmmaPeel Fri 05-Apr-19 12:57:07

Hell no, it's her child, so she gets to cover the cost of accommodation for her child. She is being an entitled cheeky fucker, do not indulge.

somuchinfo Fri 05-Apr-19 12:57:05

What a cheek. The parent pays for the child. 100per cent. I would never have expected anyone else to pay for my child. How dare she even suggest it.

LazyLizzy Fri 05-Apr-19 12:58:00

No way should you pay. You take responsibility for your own kids and their expenses.

Cheeky fucker at the highest.

JaneEyre07 Fri 05-Apr-19 13:03:03

More fool you if you pay it.

Readytogogogo Fri 05-Apr-19 13:06:24

I agree with pp that if you allow this she may assume restaurant bills etc are also split three ways not four...

Drum2018 Fri 05-Apr-19 13:06:40

No way should you pay anything towards the daughters trip - not room, food or tickets. This mother has some cheek thinking you both would pay the hotel costs. You better put her straight asap and let her known that you are paying for you alone.

DarklyDreamingDexter Fri 05-Apr-19 13:07:59

The mother should pay for her daughter, no question about it. Why would she think should others should subsidise it? Crazy!

Weebitawks Fri 05-Apr-19 13:08:04

She's taking the piss. How can anyone expect their friends to subsidise their child?

Springwalk Fri 05-Apr-19 13:08:39

Really cheeky! I hope you laughed and said no way!

BlueSaphire Fri 05-Apr-19 13:08:54

What everyone else said /\.

MarthasGinYard Fri 05-Apr-19 13:09:55

40 pounds pp

I wouldn't pay a penny more

Does the mother realise this is what other friend has asked for?

If so they are both CF

GabriellaMontez Fri 05-Apr-19 13:10:01

Ha! Nice try.

dustarr73 Fri 05-Apr-19 13:10:02

Some people have a brass neck.grin
Tell her no,you are just paying for the room you are staying in.

CuriousaboutSamphire Fri 05-Apr-19 13:11:23

So you are already paying towards her DDs travel costs..

Tell her that and ask if she wants or needs contributions towards her DDs ticket, food and drink and any other expense incurred whilst you are there?

A bit of perspective might help her pull her neck in... or be so outrageous you can only laugh out loud!

Jux Fri 05-Apr-19 13:11:35

YANBU. She pays for her child. Tell her nowt give e time to pull out if she wants to be silly.

Amongstthetallgrass Fri 05-Apr-19 13:11:45

No chance! Why should you pay for her daughter?

What did you say??

CuriousaboutSamphire Fri 05-Apr-19 13:12:24

Then again... it does depend on who is asking and who is the mother of the child... same friend?

whitesoxx Fri 05-Apr-19 13:15:00

Just reply and ask why it's shared 3 ways as you thought 4 people were going.

It's 40 each. End of

outpinked Fri 05-Apr-19 13:15:52

YANBU, total CF. She’s chosen to take her daughter so she needs to pay for her, not you.

wonderingsoul Fri 05-Apr-19 13:16:07

Personally I would split it 3 ways to make it fair and cheaper for everyone.

It's not that much of a difference imo.

thetwits Fri 05-Apr-19 13:18:44

A family room normally has a double and 2 singles for 2 adults and 2 children. Why didn't you go for that option?

Trekkingbeyond Fri 05-Apr-19 13:18:47

wondering how on Earth is that fair? Split 4 ways like everyone else has said.

Trekkingbeyond Fri 05-Apr-19 13:19:43

thetwits who goes in the double? No thanks

frazzledasarock Fri 05-Apr-19 13:19:59

Why is paying for her child making it fair?

OP are you also paying for the daughters tickets and food whilst there too?

whitesoxx Fri 05-Apr-19 13:20:39

Wondering will it also be fair for OP to pay a third towards her friends DDs theatre tickets, food, drinks, travel and souvenirs? Maybe she should share her toiletries with the child too in the name of fairness

PuppyMonkey Fri 05-Apr-19 13:22:41

Sorry if I’ve missed it, but was it the non-child friend who actually booked the rooms? If so, she should send a very clear, none negotiable text saying exactly what the other friend owes for herself and her DD. That is £160 split 4 ways.

GabriellaMontez Fri 05-Apr-19 13:23:04

Wondering how would that be cheaper for everyone?

SoupDragon Fri 05-Apr-19 13:24:50

Personally I would split it 3 ways to make it fair and cheaper for everyone.

It only makes it cheaper for one person confused

femidom12 Fri 05-Apr-19 13:25:57

Stand your ground but be prepared for a fall out..

TheGrey1houndSpeaks Fri 05-Apr-19 13:27:31

How could splitting it three ways make it fair and cheaper for everyone wonderingsoul??
It’s not cheaper or fairer for the op.
There’s an astounding amount of people who can’t do basic arithmetic.

FriarTuck Fri 05-Apr-19 13:27:36

She is so going to be splitting every expense 3 ways....

PotterHead1985 Fri 05-Apr-19 13:27:40

Hell no. Complete CF. Her crotch goblin darling child, her job to pay. Tell her to wind her neck in.

TheGrey1houndSpeaks Fri 05-Apr-19 13:28:25

Crotch goblin? Don’t be such an arse

MarthasGinYard Fri 05-Apr-19 13:28:43

So if she goes to say a....theme park or attraction is that split 3 ways too....

What about when you eat out??

lisaandpop Fri 05-Apr-19 13:29:48

@thetwits it was my friend with the daughter who booked and she said the family room only had a double plus 2 child beds so would mean one of us on child bed.

MarthasGinYard Fri 05-Apr-19 13:30:22

'Crotch goblin? '

WTF grin

lisaandpop Fri 05-Apr-19 13:30:38

It was my friend with the daughter who booked rooms and is her who is saying split 3 ways.
Me and my other friend have decided we are only paying for our room
That extra £13 will pay for our breakfast.

Fairenuff Fri 05-Apr-19 13:30:46

Get £40 off the friend you are sharing a room with and then give £80 to other friend and say 'Here's the £80 for our room'. Done.

theworldistoosmall Fri 05-Apr-19 13:31:01

Nope only budgeted for £40.
Also suggest all food/drink related costs you pay for your own, after all cf is also overcharging

MulticolourMophead Fri 05-Apr-19 13:31:45

She wants her daughter to come, so she pays her daughter's costs. They're her responsibility, no-one else's.

TheMobileSiteMadeMeSignup Fri 05-Apr-19 13:32:00

Bookings are split between the number of people.

We had a holiday with 5 adults plus our DD, as she was 4 at the time we split it as 5 and a half and we paid for 2 and a half. If she had been a teen it would have been 6 ways split.

Your friend is being a CF.

ilikemethewayiam Fri 05-Apr-19 13:34:30

I can’t believe you are actually considering paying for HER child! Why on earth would anyone think someone else should pay for their child! I’m aghast! I would just say MY share of the room is £40 and that’s all I’m paying. End of!

Giraffesinscarves Fri 05-Apr-19 13:39:49

WTF PotterHead1985

So it's okay to call children names now is it?

OhLookHeKickedTheBall Fri 05-Apr-19 13:40:26

No no no YANBU at all.
I always take responsibility for paying for my own crotch goblins grin. If other people insist on splitting that's their choice, but I'd never assume they would want to or should do.

M4J4 Fri 05-Apr-19 13:41:31

I’d tell her to cancel your and other friend’s room and you’ll book it yourself. Cheeky fucker. Is she always so grasping?

ApolloandDaphne Fri 05-Apr-19 13:41:54

She is being a CF. If she wants her child to go then she has to pay her share.

PotterHead1985 Fri 05-Apr-19 13:45:00

Jaysus things are taken so differently in different places.
To explain round these parts 'crotch goblin' is a term used when people are expecting others to capitulate to them and their ways because of their children, such as demanding their children be invited to a wedding or as in the OPs case expecting you to pay for their kids room. It is in no way meant as calling the children names and is more to do with having a go at the parent.

I would like to apologise if I offended anybody as that was not my intention. We are from different places and different things are used/said so it didn't occur to me that it would be found offensive. Apologies again. blushconfused

MarthasGinYard Fri 05-Apr-19 13:46:14

I quite like it

TheGrey1houndSpeaks Fri 05-Apr-19 13:47:06

Ah, I see.

GiveMeAllTheGin8 Fri 05-Apr-19 13:49:58

Yanbu!! Cfshock

caughtinanet Fri 05-Apr-19 13:50:08

That's a vile term to decribe a child potterhead, I've never heard it and hope I never hear it again

Comefromaway Fri 05-Apr-19 13:53:36

Unless the hotel is one that doesn't charge for children then you should each pay for the room you are sleeping in so you and 1 friend pay £40 each and other friend and her daughter pay £80.

BestestBrownies Fri 05-Apr-19 13:53:48

I think 'crotch goblin' is in fact a pretty darn accurate way to describe most spoiled, entitled brats kids these days.

PeanutButterBrownie Fri 05-Apr-19 13:55:46

I'd clear up the plan for all expenses for the trip eg dinner etc now!

PotterHead1985 Fri 05-Apr-19 13:56:54

@caughtinanet ** I can confirm you won't hear it from me again anyway.

Navigating MN can be a minefield at times as we are from all different places and have different terminologies. We also use the same words to mean different things (good and bad) so it can be dead awks. Apologies again.

OT mad example of this - if I go 10 miles up or down the road and say I want a honkey I get weird looks!! grin

PregnantSea Fri 05-Apr-19 13:58:00

Haha. That's funny. What a CF.

Glad you aren't giving her the money for this OP. What a ridiculous request!

Foslady Fri 05-Apr-19 13:59:49

Suggest you make sure she knows you’re not splitting food bills also....

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