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AIBU?

To think Americans have more only children?

38 replies

fairybeagle · 04/04/2019 16:33

It seems that Americans seem more likely to have a single child and that it's more of a norm there? Does anyone know if this is correct?
What sort of attitudes do Americans have towards only children? Less negative than other countries?

OP posts:
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Youngandfree · 04/04/2019 16:37

Possibly true... for one they have a larger population and secondly it actually costs them money to have a baby (not free like in nhs)

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mimibunz · 04/04/2019 16:42

I think it’s probably true, due to the expense. American mothers are not encouraged or supported to take lengthy maternity leave and they get little help from the state. I believe there is tax relief of about $2k per child per year.

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RicStar · 04/04/2019 16:45

Compared to UK birth rate is the same 1.8 per woman and average household size is larger over 3 vs less than 2.5. I think this means not more likely than the UK but may be some other countries. I don't think many countries have negative attitudes to only children now- it's growing to be the norm in many places. No idea on US attitudes but would guess they vary by state / back ground.

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BiscuitDrama · 04/04/2019 16:47

Within those figures there could be more only children and more larger families? I may be getting that wrong. Grin

Interesting.

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TheLovleyChebbyMcGee · 04/04/2019 16:47

Probably true, the cost of having a child, healthcare wise is expensive, and the maternity pay/leave etc is next to nothing for the majority of families

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Backwoodsgirl · 04/04/2019 16:53

Some context from a Brit In the US. Insurance excess for DD was $2k. I work for myself so can take whatever time I like, however the legal minimum in my state is 6 weeks.

One parent giving up work to stay home is more common than in the UK.

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MadameAnchou · 04/04/2019 16:56

It seems many either have one or two or are religious (Mormons, for example) and have 4+. A lot of it must also depend on where you live, some places are incredibly expensive to live in and would probably require both parents to work FT, whilst other places have lower living costs and one parent could stay at home and therefore potentially have more kids.

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RicStar · 04/04/2019 17:03

Yes the stats don't say anything about the distribution of children which could be lumpy. Until recently higher birth rate than UK so i was surprised it had dropped so fast - certainly suggests families are getting smaller and/or more women are having no children. But US is so large and diverse I would expect many micro trends.

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Tealtights · 04/04/2019 17:06

Well they are a country of 300 million so statistically of course there will be more only children than what we have. As someone else has said relatively speaking it isn't much different.

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TheVanguardSix · 04/04/2019 17:09

Less holiday plus healthcare costs means having to be sensible. But I see so many women here having 3 and 4 kids when they really cannot afford it. We tend to give this thought back home because the expense is entirely on families.
Child benefit, income support, NHS, free travel for kids... never look a gift horse in the mouth. There are no such animals at home in the States. And university costs at home are astronomical by comparison to here. Also the cost of running a car (or 2 or 3) is a lot more expensive. I'm from California. We drive incredible distances and run our cars hard. This means buying a new car every 4 years. Insurance is expensive back home. Home insurance is expensive. We have earthquakes and fires out west, tornados in the midwest, hurricanes back east.

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Jebuschristchocolatebar · 04/04/2019 17:35

I notice that Polish and In general Eastern European women (where I live in ireland) tend to only have one child. I’ve often wondered why they don’t go in for more kids or bigger families .

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ThriftyMcThrifty · 04/04/2019 17:48

I think it’s very localized - I’m in Los Angeles in California and have three and that’s pretty common although two is the norm, but I know families with one and families with seven. Here we can take six months maternity leave, 16 weeks paid, although your doctor can extend the paid portion by a couple of months by saying you are unfit to work and they often do. That’s not the case for other states though. There’s also very good tax relief for each child you have, and that’s not limited to two kids. We get less vacation time but there are a ton of camp options, all very organized and most around $125 to $250 a week depending on whether it’s sports or something more academic. And that’s also all tax deductible to a point. I find it cheaper and more importantly easier to have kids here than in the UK. We wouldn’t have had a third if still living in London. One other thing is that pay is higher for professional jobs, we’d be earning less back home. I know housing is much cheaper in other states, it’s pricy here in LA although cheaper than London. I’ve always had the impression that Americans had more kids than British people - but would love to know what it actually is statistically. When traveling we find it easy to find rooms for five, but cannot get them when we visit back home.

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Purpleartichoke · 04/04/2019 17:54

Health care and education are fracking expensive. We are very well off and I’m not sure how we will afford one child getting a university degree. Multiple children would be impossible.

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LostInShoebiz · 04/04/2019 17:58

Wouldn’t you be reluctant if it potentially cost a quarter million to educate them?

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Purpleartichoke · 04/04/2019 17:59

The average number of children per family is linked to socioeconomic status. Couples with degrees and well-paying jobs tend to have fewer children. This is partly because that group on average places a strong emphasis on education. It is also linked to the career costs of multiple children.

Ironically poorer families tend to have more children . They are less likely to help their child with education costs and already have a parent not working or working odd hours because child care is more than one parents take home salary so there is no financial gain from working.

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sirfredfredgeorge · 04/04/2019 18:04

Stats appear to show more single parent families in the UK.

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sirfredfredgeorge · 04/04/2019 18:06

er single CHILD families.

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PlainSpeakingStraightTalking · 04/04/2019 18:10

How is anything calculated these days ?

A and B have one child
A and C have one child
B and D have one child

Within that dynamic, there is the possibility that each household may or may not have a child residing with them

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Bagpuss5 · 04/04/2019 18:15

Mormons have big families.

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TheVanguardSix · 04/04/2019 18:17

Going to uni is more important to us Americans. Where you go to university is a big topic of conversation and it defines us. So being able to send our kids to school is hugely important in a way that it's not here in the UK. And sending kids to university in the States is shockingly expensive. You can't send 4-5 kids through university unless you are wealthy or you have access to every grant/scholarship available.

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SemperIdem · 04/04/2019 18:17

Not sure about real life, but in a great many American tv show’s and films. they seem to have one child. Which suggests it is more of a norm in reality, perhaps.

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Tealtights · 04/04/2019 18:19

@SemperIdem I always put it down to "lazy" writing not wanting too many siblings creating need for more actors, scenes etc lol.

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Unfinishedkitchen · 04/04/2019 18:32

Going to the best universities in America costs a bomb.

Also I’m unaware of negative attitudes towards one child families other than from the usual simpletons who can’t understand why someone would do something differently from themselves.

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HuntingHeffalumps · 04/04/2019 19:19

The few families I know, spread out across the states, seem to pursue extra curricular activities to a higher level and more diligently than over here. That's got to cost.

Acedotes are not data of course but you couldn't do that with multiple children.

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sirfredfredgeorge · 04/04/2019 21:19

Going to uni is more important to us Americans

Yet fewer USAians go to uni than UKians, so I'm not sure why that makes sense.

I think a lot of the comments on US people in this thread are about "rich" educated white families living in the north east or California, and not at all representative of the large differences in other areas.

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