To decide to stop tipping

[RevokeRemainohsodit]

I'm a middle aged nursery nurse earning minimum wage. It seems daft to leave a tip for a waiter who will be earning at least as much as me. Likewise my hairdresser.

DH thinks I'm being cheap. Anyone else dared to stop tipping?

[LordWheresMyShoes]

Do what suits you! There are many people who don't tip because they just don't want to. Having a good reason not to tip sends valid to me.

[Gatehouse77]

I only tip when I've had, what I consider, exceptional or a specific service. I don't consider it a given that certain industries expect tips as it is in America.

[Northernbeachbum]

I only tip in the UK for exceptional service, i dont get tips at work even being customer facing so I find it a little odd certain min wage jobs do get tips and some don't

If i think someone has gone above and beyond then i will tip to show i appreciate their effort

[Threeminis]

I'm with you op, my sister is a bar manager and we had a spectacular falling out due to this - until she found out how much I earned (as a Manager of a Nursery) her exact words were "I wouldn't even get out of bed for that!"
I only tip if I feel someone has gone out of their way to be accommodating or the service has been second to none.

[DirtyDennis]

I don't tip at all because I think it's unfair that some public-facing minimum wage jobs get tipped and others don't.

If I have exceptional service, though, I'll always let managers or head offices know so that person might have a chance of a pay-rise or a bonus.

[Hazeintheclouds]

I’m cheap? Is that an Americanism? Is that the same as I’m mean?

[RevokeRemainohsodit]

Thanks for replies. I've always found tipping rather demeaning for the recipient. And something Lady of the Manorish about the person handing over a fiver.

Threeminis at your sister!

[RevokeRemainohsodit]

Hazeintheclouds - don't be a tit, you know exactly what I mean.

[Dowser]

I hate the tipping culture in America.
On our first visit, 30 years ago a waitress flew out of the restaurant after us, shouting you haven’t left enough.

We just thought it was rude. We didn’t know you were supposed to leave 15 per cent.

Five of us , in a hotel so having to eat out three times a day made it a very expensive trip.

People should be paid a decent wage and not have to rely on tips.

[Fiveredbricks]

Most bar staff are well paid here unless entry level. Senior bar staff are in the mid £20'ks mostly. My best friend is a bar manager and she's on £48k + two performance bonuses of at least £10k a year. So on £68k she can, and I have told her this, get off her high horse if she ever expects a tip off anyone. She still takes offence if big orders don't leave one behind the bar

[Hazeintheclouds]

Oh dear. I wouldn’t use that expression, actually, which is rather the point. I makes no sense to someone in the UK.

[Hazeintheclouds]

It makes

[Babdoc]

Tipping is a minefield. On the one hand it’s demeaning. You wouldn’t tip your doctor or dentist, but you tip people you regard as being poorly paid or in shit jobs or beneath your own level of remuneration. On the other hand, for many of these people, the tips are a large part of their income and they’d struggle to make ends meet without them.
So you have the horrible choice of patronising them or leaving them short of money.
Ideally, we would set the minimum wage at a level that didn’t require the humiliation of tipping to make it liveable.
But until that utopia arrives, I will continue to tip. And I do so in cash, direct to the waitress, in case the management pockets the credit card gratuities.

[Threeminis]

Hazeintheclouds I'm in Scotland and have always used that expression

[Brilliantidiot]

Working in hospitality, I sometimes get tipped, sometimes don't. While I appreciate the extra cash, and it comes in useful (after Mr Tax man has taken his bit) it makes no difference to the service I offer. I also appreciate the gesture, because it reflects that the customer is happy with their experience.
To be honest, a heartfelt thank you, and a good review, or a word to manager, thank you card etc means more, because that person has gone out of their way to do that.
In a job where you're often treated like the lowest of the low, praise means an awful lot.
YANBU to not tip - but if you do get really great service, a nice way to reflect that is to say so.

[Hazeintheclouds]

Yes, I tip. It is bad form not to.

[Laiste]

I tip if we've had the same waiter/waitress throughout the whole meal and they've been particularly professional. Or helped organise a cake and a singsong if it's a birthday meal. Or gone the extra mile for youngest DC fussiness. Or something like one of those things.

9 times out of 10 these days you have multiple people serve you with minimum input, and honestly 9 times out of 10 these days there's always at least one thing not right about the meal and no fucks are given by any of the staff so no tip then.

[Theimpossiblegirl]

I only tip for exceptional service in the UK, but if abroad will try to follow cultural norms.

[adaline]

I don't tip because I don't see why some minimum wage jobs get top ups and others don't. I used to work for MW in retail and I never got tipped - yet I'd be expected to tip a waitress who was earning at least the same, if not more than I was? Why?

[Littlechocola]

I can’t imagine not tipping.
I don’t get an amazing wage but if I can afford to go out to eat I can afford to tip.

[thecatsthecats]

One thing about tips that annoys me is the % of the bill question.

I mean, I've had lovely service in some average and expensive restaurants. I've had ok service in average and expensive restaurants (perfectly pleasant but unremarkable).

Why does the lovely service in the average restaurant deserve 10% of £40, and the ok service in an expensive restaurant deserve 10% of £60?

My sister worked in a very fancy restaurant, and whilst she was undoubtedly smart, well presented, and excellent at serving, her wage plus tips resulted in earnings of £24k - about 9k more than I earned busting my gut serving people in my first office job!

[catisbeingsick]

Always tip despite my low wage. Like most things it is probably the poor who give more generously - to charity, to school trips etc

[Reddragonqueen]

I tip if the service is amazing but my job is just above minimum wage so most are earning the same if not more then me. Plus good service is part of a job description so I think they should be giving it without the he hope of more money

[MrsChanandlerBongg]

There are plenty of people out there that are more than capable, but don't tip at all just because they don't want to.

OH and I always tip as I have worked in a bar/restaurant before and it's lovely when us minimum wagers would get a nice tip.
OH is a head chef, definitely doesn't need the tips every week (they get shared out between all staff based on the amount of hours per week is worked). But he works long, hard hours, so deserves them and appreciates the extra.

So we always want to reciprocate when we go somewhere.

[WhatToDoAboutWailmerGoneRogue]

YANBU. I never tip. We live in a country where everyone gets minimum wage or above; it is not necessary and I don’t agree with it. It’s not my job to subsidise their wages.