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to have expected a 16 year old to be able to pack for a 5 day trip?

(64 Posts)
RageAgainstTheVendingMachine Tue 02-Apr-19 07:02:55

Just that really. Thanks in advance x

00100001 Tue 02-Apr-19 07:04:11

Well, depends if you've done all the packing prior to this

ScreamScreamIceCream Tue 02-Apr-19 07:05:36

Depends how you have brought them up to be fair.

If they are use to staying away even for a night and pack their own stuff then yes they would be able to.

EduCated Tue 02-Apr-19 07:05:38

Depends, is it the kind of 5 day trip they’ve been on before? Was it a school trip with a kit list?

I would expect most to be able to do it, but would also expect most parents would want to cast at least a rough eye in the direction of their bag to check they’ve made vaguely sensible choices.

Joebloggswazere Tue 02-Apr-19 07:05:53

Depends on the 16 yo. If your 16 yo is really switched on and independent and has been doing that sort of thing for a while that’s fine. I would have definitely needed some parental input at that age as I was pretty useless until I was 29 grin
Can you do it together? 16yos don’t really think outside the box like adults do.

TheQueef Tue 02-Apr-19 07:07:29

Phone= ✔
Charger= ✔

elQuintoConyo Tue 02-Apr-19 07:09:17


Of course some can and some can't. As pp have said, if the 16yo has been encouraged to do this type of thing all their lives, then it'd be easy. If someone has always done it for them, then they may not know where to start.

Sit down and write a list together, they lay it all out on the bed, then show them how to Tetris it all into the bag .

Sirzy Tue 02-Apr-19 07:09:38

Surely that depends if you have spent the last 16 years raising an independent young person or one who is used to having everything done for him?

CherryPavlova Tue 02-Apr-19 07:10:27

I think dependent on nature of trip, prior experience and how important it was to have certain items, I’d check myself and put in the factor 50, the secret spare pre-loaded money card, blister plasters and a photocopy of their passport etc
What they are capable of and what actually happens aren’t necessarily the same thing.

user1493413286 Tue 02-Apr-19 07:10:47

Yes and if they’re struggling get them to write a list that you can look over and they can pack to that list.

SileneOliveira Tue 02-Apr-19 07:11:06

No chance when it comes to my son.

He is on a D of E expedition at the moment, was given a comprehensive kit list and still needed a lot of help to pack. No SN, just a total space cadet.

MrsElijahMikaelson1 Tue 02-Apr-19 07:13:08

Have been encouraging mine to give me what they want to take on holiday since about 10.
DD has had her own case since she was 13-I checked it the first year but never did again-it’s up to her if she forgets something but tbh she over packs!

KnitterOfSocks Tue 02-Apr-19 07:13:09

My 6yo can but that's because I've always expected my children to do their own packing. I tell them how many nights and they gather the relevant changes of clothes and toothbrush etc. If you've never expected them to, I think it would be a skill they don't have.

SexNotJenga Tue 02-Apr-19 07:13:20

Based on my past experiences supporting Duke of Edinburgh expeditions, God yes, yabu. (a personal favourite was the kid who brought 3 extra clean shirts, one to wear at dinner each night. On d of e)

But it sounds like this young person may have had a valuable learning experience. What's happened?

gamerchick Tue 02-Apr-19 07:16:56

My 12 yr old can pack, but he packs an extra 6 months worth. So I'm forced to intervene or all space would be taken up by him grin. I'm hoping he'll nail it as he gets older. Hes had the important parts of packing drummed into him that must be done in advance. Not in the morning via school uniforms/bags.

If they're used to doing it then I would expect it. Otherwise, I would expect them needing a hand

Livedandlearned Tue 02-Apr-19 07:17:53

Mine can but would definitely overlook one or two things that they haven't really considered to be important, like pants hmmso writing a list with them is a good idea like pp said.

Squeegle Tue 02-Apr-19 07:20:03

Depends on the 16 year old. More info needed

Dyrne Tue 02-Apr-19 07:20:47

Agree with PP - it depends on how you’ve treated them previously.

You can’t get pissed off at a 16YO for not knowing how to do something if you’ve never taught them the skill. They won’t magically know how to do something just because they reach a certain age.

Have you sat down with them before and explained the concept of making a list, thinking about their activities, always packing one more pair of pants than they’ll need etc etc?

Even then, I’d still expect them to forget something so may still want to check their packing list/bag to make sure they have all the essentials.

Ihuntmonsters Tue 02-Apr-19 07:20:58

Not unreasonable at all! Five days is only a couple of changes of clothes plus underwear after all. My ds isn't the most organized teen in the world but packed up for a five week language course at 16/17 without problem. We talked to him about what he thought he should take and he had a suggested list from the college he went to but really we just checked he had essentials like his passport etc. We had our children pack their own bags for holidays etc for a good few years before then so it wasn't a scary prospect (the packing, not the trip)

RageAgainstTheVendingMachine Tue 02-Apr-19 07:21:51

Thanks for the replies.
Yes - school trip.
Yes - reasonably independent.
No kit list.
She is nearly 17.
I have helped her in the past and I have also got her to do the packing in the main.
I paid for her clothes and toiletries this time around and checked she had her cash and ID.
But I didn't mollycoddle her because she was told x1000 to get on with it. Nor was she taking any advice as to bag, weather etc
Result being she has flown out the door with her stuff but had a go at me for being made to pack herself this time as her parting words.
Fair comment, teen venting or a load of bollocks? Ah feck it. What's forgotten cannot be that important then, can it? <hopeful> grin

MerryMarigold Tue 02-Apr-19 07:23:21

I sometimes forget stuff at 45, and have huge experience of packing, so I'd say a list is essential then they should be able to do it by giving stuff off. I wouldn't check it. My kids are 10,13 and and pack off a list when we go on holiday or even to stay with G parents so are well used to it.

gamerchick Tue 02-Apr-19 07:24:13

Oh dear, well if she has it'll obviously be your fault grin

If she's stropping then it's definitely time she learned this skill. Sometimes they need a poke

idontknowwhattosay Tue 02-Apr-19 07:28:51

my 15 year old packs for herself and also makes sure i'm packed correctly...she loves a list!!

Freshprincess Tue 02-Apr-19 07:30:33

Mine have been doing overnights with their dad for a few years, so I thought they would have been reasonably independent. But I did have to intervene in a recent 1 night school trip. One had enough for a week, the other not right clothes. Ie Shorts in Feb for camping. Would have been a bit mean to let him learn the hard way in that.
They don’t huff and puff about packing though.

RageAgainstTheVendingMachine Tue 02-Apr-19 07:31:59

Course it's my fault gamer I am the punchbag round here. I am - can you believe it - even responsible for the weather report having changed!
<Wields hammer Punches sky Eyeroll>
(She read rain, I bloody well predicted it could be warmer. Washed her two tops for warmer weather. She wouldn't pack them due to having her heart set on the tops she'd bought for rain/cold. Told her she would not feel pretty (her words) if sweating like a pig. I'm not sure how pigs do sweat actually.
I think that might have been the point when I was officially Out in true dragon's Den stylee...but have the after guilt because I am good at being guilted.

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