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AIBU?

Pocket Money / Allowance

23 replies

ThunderR0ad78 · 01/04/2019 19:43

Hi All,

Just posting for traffic really......

My daughter is 12, in Y7 and has now started regularly going to activities, lunches, parties & shopping trips etc with her friends.

Currently I pay for these activities each time, 15 quid here, 20 quid there, you catch my drift!

I'm looking to introduce a monthly allowance for her to manage her money for which she has to complete a small number of chores per week.

Does anybody else do this? How much would you say is a reasonable amount per month and if this is also stipulated by the completion of chores, what do they do? TIA

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Al2O3 · 01/04/2019 19:47

£60 here. A mix of personal chores (clean own shoes, put own clothes away) and family chores (feed pets, wash-up, dust and occasionally hoover).

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ThunderR0ad78 · 01/04/2019 19:49

Fab, thanks - is that for a 12 year old, also?

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bodgersmash · 01/04/2019 19:52

Ours is 11 (nearly 12) and gets £15 a week. Completely tied to behaviour at school and at home. This will include doing a chore without any fuss if asked but tbh we don't ask too much. I need to start increasing areas of responsibility in line with age really.

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ThunderR0ad78 · 01/04/2019 19:58

Thanks guys, before both replies, I was thinking £50 per month with the expectation to keep her bedroom tidy all week, plus to load the dishwasher, tidy kitchen Mon-Fri in the evenings, subject to homework demands, she often has loads so there will be flexibility!

Thinking now that 50 is a bit mean and 60 is much fairer! Smile

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ThunderR0ad78 · 01/04/2019 20:14

Bump

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TeenTimesTwo · 01/04/2019 20:21

I think £50-£60 per month is a lot for a 12 yo!
This is completely discretionary spend, yes?
i.e. You are still paying for deodorants, sanitary, clothes etc.

Are you also paying for phone on top of this?

I personally feel this is too high and won't help her learn to prioritise and budget. As she gets older she'll only ask for more.

otoh If you are already giving her this amount over a month in dribs and drabs, then it is better to give it to her and tell her to manage it.

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Baconislife · 01/04/2019 20:30

I use to give mine the family allowance each month paid into their bank.
I bought toiletries and bus pass and paid for phone.
Everything else they paid for.
It helped them budget and I didn't get constantly asked for money.
They knew if they spent all in the first week there would be no more.

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ThunderR0ad78 · 01/04/2019 20:37

Yes we still pay for all toiletries, clothes and her phone. Her allowance would be for anything she wants but nothing she needs ifswim.

Obviously, she would be doing chores to earn this money and also that she maintains her fab attitude to school.

Thanks for replying

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ALLMYSmellySocks · 01/04/2019 20:41

I think 50 or 60 is generous. It will be great for her to learn to budget.

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WiKi84 · 01/04/2019 20:51

Crikey! I got £5 a week at that age (mid90's) but also had a paper round which bumped it up to £15 to be fair. Also don't think homework was anywhere near the level teenagers have to cope with now.

My DS is a bit younger but has a GoHenry card. Saves giving cash that can easily get lost and you can add a chores list that either you or the child can tick off to earn more

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Nnnnnineteen · 01/04/2019 21:08

Mine is 12 and gets £20 a month. I pay for phone, clothes and such. That is her money to spend on what she wants rather than needs , if she needs more for something it is negotiated and she would normally have to earn it or pay it back. She helps around the house anyway and does quite a lot for a 12yr old.

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Highway · 01/04/2019 21:10

A pound per year of their age or week. So a 12yo would get £12pw, this seems to be what most parents around here give.

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bodgersmash · 01/04/2019 22:11

I do expect DS to buy any fancy clothes out of his. EG I'll happily pay £25 for a pair of school shoes. If he wants to spend £50 and have Nike ones then he needs to pay the £25 difference. Likewise, if he wants to have new football boots, I'll give him enough to buy the cheapest half decent pair. If he wants to upgrade to more expensive flashy ones, he pays the difference.

I do pay for his phone (sim only, iPhone SE) and lunch money. Everything else is for him to pay for out of what I think is a very generous allowance.

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mrsm43s · 02/04/2019 11:58

A lot of these seem really high!

My 13 and 14 year olds get £25 per month.

However, we do pay phone, gym and swim membership, spotify, netfix , all clothes, toiletries, birthday presents for friends, pay for some entertainment (cinema trips, organised meals out) etc. We also give them an extra £50 each over the summer holidays, as they need more as are out and about more.

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bodgersmash · 02/04/2019 13:18

@mrsm43s I would be shocked if what you do doesn't add up to much more than what others here pay. The difference is probably just that your children aren't budgeting it themselves whereas when the money is given to them directly the onus is on them. Do you give them lunch money too?

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Isitteayourlookingfor · 02/04/2019 13:21

I pay £40 pm , pay towards mobile phone and buy all toiletries etc. Also gets £40 pm from gp. Very sensible with it and not a spendthrift . Does do chores around the house but no much

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RomanyQueen1 · 02/04/2019 13:36

We used to give the amount it would cost for a magazine and sweets until they started secondary. Not that they bought these, but it was the yardstick we used.
Then we added a bit more between 11 and 13.
Once teens they has £60 of their cb and I'd save the remaining £20.
They all had to do chores except for dd, who can only do them occasionally.

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PolarBearDisguisedAsAPenguin · 02/04/2019 13:39

This probably isn’t a popular opinion but I feel that chores should be done regardless and not paid for.

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xWholeLottaRosiex · 02/04/2019 13:46

@polarbear I agree. Chores are done in my house by us all, because we all live there. Team work makes the dream work Grin If they ask for a pound or two here & there I will give them it, assuming behaviour has been good etc. My DC are 9 & 10 so don't have need for the levels of money that some of the other posters are discussing above. The few quid mine get just gets spent on sweeties Smile

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RomanyQueen1 · 02/04/2019 13:52

Ours did some chores because they were expected to, but could earn for doing extra or a one off clear the shed, type of job.
It does them well being able to earn extra to put towards an expensive labelled item, that I wouldn't pay for.

I think it's good for teens to learn how to budget so much for phone, toiletries, entertainment, presents for friends and family.

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bridgetreilly · 02/04/2019 13:58

I wouldn't have 'keep bedroom tidy all week' as a chore. That's really difficult to manage and police - like, if she has one super-busy day and clothes aren't put away at the end of it, you'll dock her allowance? I would make it more concrete, and specific e.g. tidy and clean bedroom every weekend, including hoovering, emptying bin, sorting laundry.

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Comefromaway · 02/04/2019 14:00

I looked up what the expectation for children in care is (they are meant not to be disadvantaged from their peers) and for a 12 year old the recommended amount is £4-6 per week.

As dd reached her later teen years I started to give her extra so she could buy her own clothes.

Ds is 15 and gets £6-8 per week depending on behaviour.

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reluctantbrit · 02/04/2019 14:22

DD is 11/Y7 and gets currently £20/month. That is for paying drinks and sweets when out on her own. She is expected to save for things like make up.

We pay for all necessary items like toiletries, sanitary products, school stationery. If she wants a different brand or anything not essential she may need to pay the difference/full price or wait until I can find it on offer.

We pay for her phone as long as the amount is reasonable and as she has a decent contract she doesn't go over much if at all. Sweets are bought for the family at home.

So far we pay for the odd cinema or bowling trip as she doesn't go out very often yet. If that would change then we would increase her allowance. So far she saves at least 1/2 each months, that means for me she is ok with it.

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