NC but regular poster.
DH and I have been TTC for 3 years. 6 months ago after tests, we were told we would need IVF, very little hope of a natural conception.
When we began TTC I was 30 (DH 40) which feels a lifetime ago now. I've never been a person who 'had' to have children, but we loved the idea of having a family and we're doing well financially. I thought if it happens, great. If not, oh well.
But when it became evident it wasn't happening, I really wanted it to. I was devestated when we were told it wasn't likely. It's a rollercoaster.
Our lives have revolved around this for so long, that I'm starting to wonder if it's right.
I've had to accept the idea it might never happen, and what that future would look like. Focusing on positives like freedom, less stress, more spontaneity and so on.
And I'm starting to think maybe it's not happened for a reason. Maybe I'm not meant to be a mum.
AIBU to feel like this? To think, after all this, that enough is enough and I can have just a happy life without children?
Or am I protecting myself from the pain of infertility, telling myself I don't want what I reasonably know won't happen.
I'm not jealous at all of friends with children and I find puppies cuter than babies all I hear about is the no sleep, constant worry and financial costs of kids - but the idea of never having a family physically hurts.
Anyone ever felt anything similar? At all?
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AIBU?
AIBU to change my mind about TTC
38 replies
JustANewOne · 27/03/2019 20:08
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