Does anyone else hate doing housework with children?(18 Posts)
I have a 3 year old, single parent so not much chance to do it other than the days she’s here.
But I hate it.
She wants to do all the fun jobs like laundry or sweeping but won’t put her toys away so I can hoover.
Then when we do the jobs she wants to do she snatches the cup with powder or fabric softener in out of my hand because she thinks it’s her job and then it ends up all over the floor. If I tell her off for snatching she just says “but I’m helping mummy” and doesn’t seem to understand that we need to slow down to get the job done.
I feel awful that I’ve taken to doing everything apart from hoovering once she’s in bed because I can get it done without her trying to snatch or make a mess.
I’ve tried a reward chart where she earns 10 minutes of tablet time for every job of housework she does properly and as per my instructions but she still steams ahead and tries to do it her way.
I feel awful about it as I want her to know how to do these things. When she does them properly and slows down she does a really good job and I praise her loads.
She might be a bit little yet, I don’t know.
Anyone else hate housework with their child/ren?
Things like wash powder/softener I'd refuse to let her use. At 3 she's too young to treat them appropriately and some can be harmful, so I'd have a blanket ban on stuff that could cause harm.
I'd give her little tasks she's capable of achieving, and stay firm on the "no, that's not for you to touch" jobs.
However, she's also very little to be wiling to tidy up her own stuff, so I'd go with helping her and starting each chore off.
At 3 I wouldn’t have my kids near detergent (or cleaning fluids in general), mine at that stage we’re putting clothes in the laundry basket, putting toys away, laying the table, and randomly wiping at things with cloths.
If she slows down with the powder/detergent she is fine, it's just the snatching and trying to think she knows how to do it.
She loves sweeping and mopping and wiping tables too.
She also won't put her toys away, she hates the hoover though so that might be why.
My nearly 3 year old doesn’t help (might occasionally wipe round random objects with a duster). Why do you need her to help? Just leave her playing while you do it, then when it’s time to hoover just tell her we’re going to put your toys away now, you can get them back out when we’re done hoovering. My son likes to leave a few things out though so that he can save them from the hoover monster
She’s only 3. She doesn’t really understand. Can you just give her a cloth or something and a bit to clean so you can do the rest? Seems to work with my little cleaning enthusiast. I also buy non toxic cleaning products so he can help spraying (his favourite task).
I think you are expecting way too much for a three year old
I'd give her a cloth and a spray with only water in which is special for her to use. Perhaps also so toy items like mini mops. I wouldn't expect her to be able to actually do any jobs though except a little dusting. She too young to be using actual cleaning products.
I have a cloth and a lunchbox with water and it's her job to clean all the doors. She's very thorough (even at 2.5!) So it takes her most of the time to do that as it takes me to clean the whole flat. She wont help tidy toys either though, like yours hates the Hoover.
My 3 year old is going through a cleaning phase, I just give her a dry cloth and let her wipe things, she’ll help put the dirty knives and forks in the dish washer and will use her pretend hoover when I’m hoovering up. I just let her play, it’s a pain at times when it makes the jobs 10 times harder but it keeps her happy, plus it helps her to learn. I’m pretty sure my mother in law must have cleaned when my husband was in bed as he’s no idea what a duster, mop, hoover or washing machine is.
Getting her to pick up her toys is OK but again I'd expect you to be giving her a hand.
My two are 8 and 10 and I get them to put their clothes away, make beds, load dishwasher, make toast but even at their age I don't expect them to use detergent.
I would stick with little jobs for her like wiping the table or tidying toys or using dustpan and brush, if she enjoys being helpful.
I hate having my ds 'help' me. It just ends up more of a mess. I could never understand those who say get them to fold laundry with you , or help pack a drawer. It just ends up having to do it twice and more mess.
If I start cleaning she wants to help me, she wants to do the job I'm doing, she won't do a special job just for her or whatever. She just makes more of a mess.
Maybe I'll leave it a few years to get her more involved then.
It's a nightmare OP if you can get away with doing it when she is in bed I would. The one task I let my PFB help me with is taking the Tupperwares out of the dishwasher. He's obsessed with the washing machine and tumble dryer I've had to put child locks on them . I also brought him a toy Dyson - no dice he wants Mommy's 🙄.
My 3 year old loves cleaning and he does the powder for the washing machine, helps with dishwasher, hanging up washing etc. Maybe start by doing it together then she won't need to snatch from you?
I really try and get my 4yo and almost 2yo involved as it's supposed to be good for them and they like joining in. Although a 5 minute job can take 1 hour. I think of it as sort of playing with them rather than me getting the jobs done though. If I really need to get the jobs done quick (e.g. people visiting my bombsite of a house) then it's CBeebies time whilst I race round! I also let my 4yo put the washing powder in and it often ends up on the floor creating more mess.
I thought this article was good, the breaking into subtasks.
My 3 year old DD knows that when it's hoover time she gets to play on the iPad. (She hates the hoover too)
We sing the clean up song and I help her. (It's mostly the dogs toys as DD is pretty good at keeping it in one spot and not on the floor) I also tell her she won't get the iPad unless she cleans up.
She also doesn't help me with the washing powder but will put in and out the clothes.
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