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DD in isolation for wearing the wrong socks

(220 Posts)
swirlycurly Sun 24-Mar-19 22:12:41

DD who's in year 7 is being put in the isolation room at school tomorrow for wearing the incorrect colour socks, white instead of black. She did do this two days in a row after being warned so I do think she should accept the punishment as she was warned. But AIBU to think this is a silly rule anyway? They seem to claim that having school uniform is setting them up for life and work yet what workplace is going to tell someone to work away from everyone facing a wall for the day because they wore the wrong colour socks? So why do schools feel the need to be so strict?

Acis Mon 25-Mar-19 11:28:47

would you fancy teaching 30 kids to GCSE or A level whose parents say" don't be a compliant robot"

Good teachers and schools do this, by working on the basis of ensuring that there are good reasons for the rules they operate so that the majority of pupils accept them and comply with them because they can see the justification. OK, there will always be a few who kick against the rules, but the fact that the school community as a whole buys in to those rules makes it relatively easy to deal with them. If teachers use draconian punishments for minor infringements of pointless rules, they simply store up trouble for themselves because their pupils won't respect them.

MarshaBradyo Mon 25-Mar-19 11:28:08

We had strict rules on uniform, skirt length, colour of hair ribbon. Probably did help us all not look chaotic. No isolation back then though just detention

I would expect a yr 7 to do their own uniform

WeepingWillowWeepingWino Mon 25-Mar-19 11:25:20

I guess one person's free-thinker is another person's critical thinker. I actually think most go-getting employers would rather have critical thinkers than mindless drones.

BlueSky123456 Mon 25-Mar-19 11:24:55

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Acis Mon 25-Mar-19 11:22:33

By telling your children it's a silly rule you are telling them that teachers shouldn't be respected and that the rules don't have to apply to them. This would be really frowned upon in the non uniform wearing school.

No, you're telling them that you are not going to lie and pretend a silly rule isn't silly. Schools and teachers can't expect to be able to demand unthinking respect for anything and everything they do, no matter how daft.

Acis Mon 25-Mar-19 11:20:35

It's still a choice. Or do you have some spiffy idea about how parents who are "obliged" to send their children to XY school should somehow be exempt from the school's rules?

Not the point, really. It's you who said that people should automatically obey stupid rules because they "chose" the school. You need to explain how that works when the parents didn't choose.
And no, a choice between sending your child to the only school on offer and losing the roof over your family's head is not a choice.

shesgrownhorns Mon 25-Mar-19 11:20:09

Poor girl she's only 11 !

parttimeateverything Mon 25-Mar-19 11:19:15

madcatladyfoever would you fancy teaching 30 kids to GCSE or A level whose parents say" don't be a compliant robot". I'm sure you'd be quick to complain about standards when kids don't do homework etc because you know don't be a compliant robot. Would you like to run a company where people take time off because the sun is shining or they slept late because no need to be compliant? This free thinking spirit is great if you homeschool or set up your own company, othereiyou have have to get along with others and that needs regulation.

Acis Mon 25-Mar-19 11:18:21

Because if they said grey, someone would wear black. The colour is irrelevant, it's the rule that matters

My point was that they could choose any plain, dark boring colour, plus maybe white, so there is a wide range of choice - and would save the sort of pointless fuss OP's daughter has had. I get it that some kids might turn up in purple, but really sensible schools will turn a blind eye as very few people will even notice. Rebellion is only fun if someone makes a fuss about it.

parttimeateverything Mon 25-Mar-19 11:14:48

Acis I taught at a school in Europe that my kids attended. They didn't wear uniform and I thought it was great. But to answer your question, the children learn respect and being considerate etc because teachers are treated with respect by their parents and in society as a whole. There was a huge emphasis on understanding how your actions impact on others and the biggest of all was equality. By telling your children it's a silly rule you are telling them that teachers shouldn't be respected and that the rules don't have to apply to them. This would be really frowned upon in the non uniform wearing school.

madcatladyforever Mon 25-Mar-19 11:08:27

Schools are busy making a whole generation of compliant little robots.

WeepingWillowWeepingWino Mon 25-Mar-19 11:07:08

I'm finding it hard to believe that you are a teacher, echt. Your understanding seems a little limited.

lalafafa Mon 25-Mar-19 11:04:41

What’s so hard about following the rules? Teachers have better things to do than police socks! No wonder there’s so many fucking snowflakes with parentsb like some of you lot.

echt Mon 25-Mar-19 10:54:39

It's totally unrealistic to say parents have the choice of home educating. For many families, losing one parent's income is the difference between keeping the family home and, well, not

It's still a choice. Or do you have some spiffy idea about how parents who are "obliged" to send their children to XY school should somehow be exempt from the school's rules?

echt Mon 25-Mar-19 10:52:23

If schools must have rules around these things, they would be much better off stipulating either plain socks in any colour, or at most plain socks in, say, white, black, brown, grey or navy

Because if they said grey, someone would wear black. The colour is irrelevant, it's the rule that matters.

Acis Mon 25-Mar-19 10:51:55

It's totally unrealistic to say parents have the choice of home educating. For many families, losing one parent's income is the difference between keeping the family home and, well, not.

Cheeeeislifenow Mon 25-Mar-19 10:51:23

If your daughter is seen going around school in white socks it sends a message to the other pupils it’s ok. She needs to buck her ideas up.

Ha ha ha fucking anarchy!!

echt Mon 25-Mar-19 10:50:49

parttimeateverything, so how come children in other countries manage fine learning those rules despite never having to conform to silly uniform rules at school?

Yes , they do. Uniform is ineffably stupid, so why parents in the UK don't vigorously campaign against it amazes me.

Not.

A good number are happy to send their children to uniform schools that gain part of their reputation for the bloody silly way the pupils are obliged to dress.

And then piss and moan when those same rules apply to their PFB.

Acis Mon 25-Mar-19 10:48:57

If your daughter is seen going around school in white socks it sends a message to the other pupils it’s ok

And? Will the world come to an end? Will the school collapse? Will children suddenly be unable to learn?

If schools must have rules around these things, they would be much better off stipulating either plain socks in any colour, or at most plain socks in, say, white, black, brown, grey or navy.

Brilliantidiot Mon 25-Mar-19 10:48:40

You don't have to send your DD to that school.

I have to send my DD to the school she's at. The other 2 within realistic travel are over subscribed, and I know this because when her school started to go spectacularly tits up I applied to both. And got turned down as there wasn't room. So some of us do have to send children to a certain school. Believe me if I could have moved her I would have.

You can campaign at governors to change the rules to ones that say whatever the rules are they are petty

Yes I agree, however my DDs school is currently of the opinion that everything that's wrong is down to parents and children. End of discussion. It's also completely passed them by that they are in a deprived area, it's a hell of a lot easier to adhere to rules that cost money when you have it.

I detest school uniforms, though not nearly so much as the views of parents who piss and moan about that they signed up for.

But I didn't have a choice, I didn't get an option. My DD has to have an education, I'm in no way qualified to provide that, a school is much better placed, and there is only one, miserably failing, school, available.

Fwiw we follow the rules, they've just changed yet again, because apparently the only way to improve a school is by uniform rules, which is incredibly short sighted. I understand that a uniform is a good thing, but if it's so 'essential' why aren't teachers and staff required to wear one too? Lead by example?

echt Mon 25-Mar-19 10:46:54

yes - but I'm talking about your comment 'what they signed up for'. If DD got given a school that wasn't one of our 6 and we'd never looked at, there would be no choice (homeschooling not being an option on the table)

But you still agreed to it.

Acis Mon 25-Mar-19 10:45:32

parttimeateverything, so how come children in other countries manage fine learning those rules despite never having to conform to silly uniform rules at school?

WeepingWillowWeepingWino Mon 25-Mar-19 10:44:32

yes - but I'm talking about your comment 'what they signed up for'. If DD got given a school that wasn't one of our 6 and we'd never looked at, there would be no choice (homeschooling not being an option on the table).

Langrish Mon 25-Mar-19 10:43:54

Some rules are ridiculous without a doubt and if you don’t like them, campaign to change them.

Until then, she needs to wear black socks. Not so hard is it?

(I hate white socks, buggers to get completely clean)

lalafafa Mon 25-Mar-19 10:42:00

If your daughter is seen going around school in white socks it sends a message to the other pupils it’s ok. She needs to buck her ideas up.

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