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AIBU asking for help with a bottle refuser, I'm desperate!

(34 Posts)
Ilovemysleepthief Sun 24-Mar-19 10:58:51

DD is 8 months old, and EBF. When she was tiny she took the odd bottle of formulae, expressed mink, but since 4 months old has completely refused any kind d of bottle.

I have spent a fortune on various bottles and treats, but no look. Also tried different people giving it her, giving when not hungry, when hungry etc, no luck

She still has minimum 3 night feeds, so obviously I'm the only one that can do this.

I'm desperate for a decent nights sleep, and for my husband to be able to help sad

Has anyone managed to get their baby to take a bottle in circumstances such as this?

She will drink water from a sippy cup at a push, but again not milk

DippyAvocado Sun 24-Mar-19 15:02:53

Bottle-refusing DC2 started nursery at 8 months when I went back to work (3 days a week) so had to start drinking from a bottle or cup during the day or just go without I didn't want to start using bottles at that age so I just sent in a Tommy Tippee sippy cup. She barely touched a drop for 2 weeks then one day downed the lot and never looked back.

At 8 months, assuming she is eating a reasonable amount in the day, you could try only offering bottle or cup during night wakings as they don't actually need milk at night at that age. Pick one night feed to start off with. You could need to prepare for a few nights of resistance but eventually she will probably either give in and take what's offered, or end up going back to sleep without anything to drink. If you want to prepare for this, you could start shortening night feeds beforehand. That's how I weaned my DC off night feeds. She went from feeding every 2 hours at night to not feeding at all between 8 and 6 within the space of about 2 weeks. She still woke up sometimes, but was happy with a quick cuddle (or more usually, coming into bed with me!)

I'm not advocating leaving to cry by the way. I've never ever left mine to cry, which is possibly why 6yo DD still wakes every night, but that's another story!

museumum Sun 24-Mar-19 15:06:28

I gave up in your circumstances and have never been so relieved as when I did.
I introduced a cup at 6mo and night weaned at 10mo.
He had a cup of formula at bedtime and a bf and started sleeping through (he’d been ebf till then).
He used a cup and had food in the day when I was at work.

Honestly giving up on trying bottles was such a relief.

TheInventorofToasterStreudel Sun 24-Mar-19 18:39:21

We had a lot of problems with my son when he was younger - CMPA, 2 hospital admissions, constantly hungry, night feeds every 45 mins, faltering growth. We weaned at 4 months - he snaked his neck out like a "Hungry Hungry Hippo" and chomped a banana I was holding. He was still feeding multiple times a day and night at 7.5 months, and our lovely pediatrician told me to stop demand feeding. It was such a relief to be given "permission" to do this (we'd been crucified for early weaning etc at baby group). DS refused bottles for top ups from a very early age but took to a sippy cup very well. Perhaps your little one would prefer a sippy cup? We liked the Boots basic one so much that we bought 5!

totrainornottotrain Sun 24-Mar-19 18:42:31

Hunger strike eventually worked for us.

Try different temperatures. MAM bottles were good. But we did have to let her go hungry/thirsty eventually.

wizzler Sun 24-Mar-19 19:18:36

Just wanted to send some moral support. Ds is 14 now but the most stressful period of my entire parenting experience was when he refused any alternative to the breast, and I was about to return to full time work. Tried everything including starving him but he just sobbed and screamed ( and so did I)

I tried loads of different teats and in the end he took one.. (it was a Chico one ) ... but I was in bits trying to sort it out!.

Just wanted to wish you good luck and to keep the Mn adage in your mind... this too shall pass

Ilovemysleepthief Sun 24-Mar-19 20:28:10

Thank you for the advice, its so stressful sad I dont want to stop feeding her, but I just want my husband to be able to do the odd feed and for me to return to work and not worry that shes not having milk.

Its definitely more of a comfort thing rather than thirst/hunger, but I just cant get her to be settled any other way. She feeds every 2 hours through the night still, despite being on solid in the day.

Ihatehashtags Mon 25-Mar-19 08:36:26

3 feeds a night that 8 months? That seems a lot. If she gets hungry enough she’ll take a bottle for sure.

exexpat Mon 25-Mar-19 08:47:34

I had a bottle refuser who basically never drank milk again after I gave up breast feeding at 15 months. He's now a strapping 6ft young man who still never drinks milk (has never had it on cereal or anything either) but it hasn't done him any harm.

By eight months you could try increasing solids and trying to reduce night feeds?

Ilovemysleepthief Mon 25-Mar-19 09:16:42

I have been trying that, and giving more solids, but the milk in the night is purely for comfort I think. I have tried just cuddling etc, but shes only settled by the boob confused. It's so hard, I'm on my knees plus I have a bad back at the moment which is also affecting my mood. Sorry for moaning, I know I'm lucky to have her, I'm just so tired sad

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