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Does anyone else run out of conversation after 2 - max?

(50 Posts)
MillyCoddler Sun 24-Mar-19 08:32:42

I'm fine if I'm just meeting a friend for coffee, maybe a dog walk but any longer and I've completely emptied my conversational reserves.

In laws are visiting today. Lovely, chatty people but they stay for lunch and dinner and I'm floundering for anything to say after a while.

I envy those who can go on holiday with people other than DH and DC or have weekend long visitors and the conversation flows effortlessly.

Schooladvicenamechange Sun 24-Mar-19 08:33:22

Yes I find it quite hard too!

MillyCoddler Sun 24-Mar-19 08:33:24

Sorry title should have said after 2 hours

MightyAtlantic Sun 24-Mar-19 08:34:55

Me! I can only chat for so long, even with good friends.

StrawberrySquash Sun 24-Mar-19 08:38:30

Is it an introvert thing of running out of mental energy to talk or is it that you have x things to talk about with person y and you've covered them all? Does it vary by person? I find there are people I just hit a wall with.

BetterEatCheese Sun 24-Mar-19 08:38:36

I like to make a little mental list of topics in alphabetical order so they're easy to remember and go from there. If they're chatty just ask questions and they will likely lead the way

junebirthdaygirl Sun 24-Mar-19 08:40:23

If we had inlaws for lunch and later dinner we would all sit around in the afternoon and read the Sunday papers or go out for a walk. The papers usually lead to a bit of idle chat about an article. Unless they are prone to reading you out whole sections!!
Having the papers in means you can say...why don't ye sit in here and relax for a while while l do a few things for dinner.
I wouldn't be leaving myself with hours of sitting chatting although l am well able to do it.
Or if you have DC get them to ask gd to read a story or build their Lego kit. Break up the day.

speakout Sun 24-Mar-19 08:41:14

Gin is the answer.

In fact specifically designed for such events.

Bringbackthestripes Sun 24-Mar-19 08:43:34

I’m done after an hour! I think it’s because I do so little -work, eat, sleep- and so have nothing interesting to talk about but also I’m conscious that I don’t want to waffle on and bore people to death. I am constantly stuck talking to people who drone on...and on....and on.... at work and wonder why they don’t know they talk too much.

Whatdoyouknowwhenyouknownowt Sun 24-Mar-19 08:45:37

Yeah, I've decided I have a 2-hr limit. Very chatty introvert.

JustDanceAddict Sun 24-Mar-19 08:51:18

Depends who it is.
Best mates- can chat all day without a problem.
Older friends but not as close - prob a couple of hrs or so. I’m
Meeting a friend of this nature today and it will be enough time to catch up.
Newer friends like ex-work colleagues - again a couple of hrs is absolute max. Convo just dries up, but it doesn’t mean I don’t want to see them occasionally.
This is all one-to-one, groups are different.
I’m an extrovert ie, I love company, not keen on my own, but I’m still fairly quiet by nature.

JustDanceAddict Sun 24-Mar-19 08:52:31

Re MIL - she talks at you incessantly so 2 hours and I’m climbing the walls.

Purplecatshopaholic Sun 24-Mar-19 09:02:02

Ha! Speakout is right - go with the gin, lol

BitOfFun Sun 24-Mar-19 09:05:02

A joint activity is helpful in these situations, I think.

algo Sun 24-Mar-19 09:06:30

It really depends. With my ex for instance, there were times where we would chat for hours upon hours through the night about nothing and everything. With most some others, 2 sentences in and I'm all ready to end the conversation and move on with my day. grin

Boysey45 Sun 24-Mar-19 09:09:56

2 hours is long enough for a visit anyway. Put the t.v on and get magazines/papers out as well, so they can have a flick though those if they want to.
Unless someone can have a 2 way conversation with me, then I'm not listening to them rabbiting on and on at me.

Hermagsjesty Sun 24-Mar-19 09:10:01

Me too! It’s not so much I run out of conversation, but I just get tired of being around other people after 2+ hours. I come across as quite chatty but I think I’m a secret introvert at heart!

musicposy Sun 24-Mar-19 09:21:58

I can chat to anyone for hours, always have since a small child, and I'm trying to work out how I do it so I can be of help. I think it's because I'm a really nosey person! So when MIL comes round I ask about every other extended family member individually and can spend a long time discussing the answers, talk about their hobbies, their holidays, their friends, their health. DH, on the other hand, will meet with his parents and find out literally nothing. I think MIL really likes chatting to me because I take a genuine interest in her life.

If we run out of that I start talking about the next room I want to decorate or what I want to plant in the garden and ask her advice (I don't often follow it but she sometimes has good ideas!), or have they been to x or y on holiday when they were younger as we are considering it? Or asked if they watched x y or z on TV, or if they've heard such and such a news article, or are they finding food expensive at x supermarket or the queues longer, or the traffic getting worse on a Sunday. Anything, anything at all. Think of a few beforehand if you think you'll be stuck in the spot.

I think questions are the key, along with a willingness to chat about their answers. If they're not very chatty people, witter on about every little thing the DCs have done in the week or talk about your work. The PP who suggested a list of subjects was a great idea if all this doesn't come naturally.

HotChocolateLover Sun 24-Mar-19 09:24:52

Remember this and you will be fine.....
Everyone’s favourite topic is themselves 😂 I’m quite a shy person and hours of talking can be hard for me so if things are getting quiet, just ask a question even if you don’t give a shite about the answer and it should get things moving again.

ShannonRockallMalin Sun 24-Mar-19 09:30:39

If conversation ever stalls with my in-laws, Brexit is the topic to get them fired up again, and incidentally often persuades them to leave earlier than planned as well grin

Hiddenaspie1973 Sun 24-Mar-19 09:32:40

Yes. Our long time friends were over last night and we don't really say much after a while. Tiredness, bit of depression just sucks it out of us. Once we've talked a sentence each about work, a paragraph about holidays, conversation turns to brexit, immigration and depresses us so we knock it on the head.
We listen to 80s music and the prodigy whilst the fellas drink from kegs.
It's relaxing but we're not sparkling conversationalists.

1CantPickAName Sun 24-Mar-19 09:33:42

Newspapers are a good idea. What about a Sunday afternoon film or a game such as scrabble?

oneforthepain Sun 24-Mar-19 09:33:48

If they're chatty, just keep asking questions and they'll power along.

Unless you actually want a break from that many hours of chat, in which case use the magazines etc suggestion above. And/or start taking afternoon naps between lunch and dinner.

You can spend the day in each other's company without needing to talk for every minute of it.

MillyCoddler Sun 24-Mar-19 10:00:11

Thanks for replies 😊

All hell would break out if I shared Sunday papers with in laws!

I hear of people who chat about films or books or art - do you?

MillyCoddler Sun 24-Mar-19 10:03:20

Oh and another thing I have to be wary of - telling the same tale twice blush I honestly can't remember if I've told someone the story of, say, me getting stuck in a loo in Madrid. Or aunty Mavis's hip replacement saga.

How do you keep track of what you've said since you last saw someone?

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