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Two Aspies - Clash!

(7 Posts)
LellowYedbetter Sat 23-Mar-19 09:35:27

I have been asked to work with a new starter for 3 weeks. We’re mobile workers so this means she will be in my car with me throughout the whole working day. Difficult for me as I have aspergers so really value my time alone but I didn’t want to sound like a bitch so agreed to it. Met her on Friday and she’s lovely. Got in the car and oh my god the woman does not stop talking. She rattled on and on and on about some boxing tickets continuously throughout the whole day. She did not stop for breath. Because if some other quirks I noticed I think she probably has aspergers too but she’s the opposite of me. I don’t talk unless I have to. This woman talks non stop. From the minute we got in the car until we had to get out for visits ... on and on and on, same subject all day. By lunch time I was close to a meltdown so started saying weird stuff. She didn’t notice. She just carried on talking. By 3pm I couldn’t take it any longer, I was fighting the urge to scream so told her she could sneak off home 2 hours early and I wouldn’t tell anyone.
I’m back with her Monday but I don’t know how to deal with it. I’m close to ringing in sick but then I feel like I’m being unfair as it’s likelt we both suffer from the same condition and I always expect people to be tolerant of my traits??!

I described the human centipede film to her in graphic detail. She didn’t bat an eyelid. Just said “sounds like an odd film” and went back to talking about boxing!!!

Hearthside Sat 23-Mar-19 15:41:24

HiLellow will you actually be working together as well as travelling together .Reason i ask because if she is creating anxiety for you it will probably show and maybe affect how you do your job.I support people with Autism so i can understand where you are coming from .I think your best bet is too speak to your employer as soon as you can .I don't think you are being unfair to her to be honest if it is triggering anxiety for you ,it be she is nervous or as you say she has aspergers too .But you never know she might be feeling the same way but it either way it is no good if it is making you want to ring in sick .Your employer should understand how it is making you feel ,it's no ones fault .Good luck .

Nathansmommy1 Sat 23-Mar-19 21:44:36

I don't think it would be unreasonable to speak to your boss. My child has aspergers and while I hope that nt people will be open and accommodating towards him, I think this would be asking too much from another aspie who is the complete opposite to him. Just tell your employer how you are really feeling and that you cannot cope with constant chatter, you need quiet time. I'm sure they will understand

TheFirstOHN Sat 23-Mar-19 21:47:33

"I need to ask you not to talk while I'm driving, as I need to focus on driving safely and I can't risk getting distracted."

Wolfiefan Sat 23-Mar-19 21:47:35

Can you tell her she needs to be quiet whilst you’re driving so you can concentrate?

Wolfiefan Sat 23-Mar-19 21:47:47

X post!!

Expressedways Sat 23-Mar-19 21:52:06

Yes agree with PP’s about saying you need silence to concentrate on driving. If she doesn’t listen then mention it to your boss and say you don’t feel like you can drive safely with her in the car. And as a rule it’s not a great idea to describe the human centipede film to colleagues unless you want to end up in front of HR 😂

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