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AIBU to not want partner going out night before mother's Day?

(111 Posts)
ohhcecelia Fri 22-Mar-19 18:15:39

DH had planned a night in with some mates Friday before mother's Day - which was fine, I planned to go off my mum's to spend the night so I was out of the way.

Now people can't make it so instead he's planning a work night out, the Saturday night before mother's Day? AIBU to be upset at this? No plans for the next day, I obviously won't get one of the two lie-ins I get a year (birthday and MD) and he'll spend the entire day hungover.

Weenurse Mon 01-Apr-19 08:58:47

How are things?

Viobihi Mon 01-Apr-19 11:26:25

I think in isolation it's very precious and over the top to not want your DH to socialise the night before Mother's Day, but it sounds like there's a lot more going on here. I wouldn't even be focusing on Mother's Day, you need to sit down with him and insist that he pulls his weight throughout the year. It's not fair for you to be doing everything

Do you ever read threads before posting on them? 🤦🏽‍♀️

Eliza9917 Mon 01-Apr-19 12:44:09

Did he collect his stuff and leave OP?

tinatsarina Mon 01-Apr-19 20:18:15

I hope you've chucked him out. Did he come back for his stuff?

ohhcecelia Mon 08-Apr-19 09:29:28

Sorry for being ignorant - the past week has been tough. He's still here and determined to stay until his eviction notice requires him to. Treating the place like a hotel, going out until all hours, barely seeing his daughter, accompanied by leading me on asking for a hug, asking for a kiss, asking if he got a place of his own for a few months to get space do I think it would work.

I know I need to stop being pathetic and try and take back control but this is so fucking hard.

MyKingdomForBrie Mon 08-Apr-19 09:35:07

Oh god I'd be bolting the door from the inside or changing the locks or just booking a week away anywhere with your dd, just get out of the situation some how! He's a vile prick who doesn't love you. Remember that - he doesn't love you and he's been making a massive twat of you in front of this girl at work by basically telling her every day that he fancies her not you.

Do NOT take him back!!!

Ginger1982 Mon 08-Apr-19 09:39:18

How long until his notice is up?

ohhcecelia Mon 08-Apr-19 09:55:23

Another week. Just turned up home, acting like I'm the ridiculous one for not being able to sleep and worrying about him being out all night. Perhaps I am.

Quartz2208 Mon 08-Apr-19 10:20:01

You need to take back control - if this has taught you anything its that it is truly over. He needs to know this

Ignore him completely

Dropitlikeitshot Mon 08-Apr-19 10:20:53

Why haven’t you kicked him out? Change the locks, throw his crap out and be done with it. Obviously tell your relative what you’re doing, but they can’t act aware to him.
It’s very difficult, but the relief you’ll feel will be immense.

0nTheEdge Mon 08-Apr-19 18:37:25

I've read your posts again and it sounds like he's been neglecting you for some time. He takes all the lie-ins bar max 2 a year, so 362 for him. He lets you do most of the housework and does not accommodate you working. He showed you a total lack of consideration when booking the night out before mother's day, sent you crappy messages, is probably cheating or at best mugging you off by flirting and spending time with another woman. He threatened to frame you for HIS drugs when you voiced displeasure over his shoddy behaviour. Have I missed anything out? Do you honestly want to be in a relationship with this man? Do you think there's any chance he'll actually change? I think you are worth a lot more than he could ever provide. Your daughter too.

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