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To think your dog's reaction to me is not my problem?

(21 Posts)
aliphil Tue 19-Mar-19 13:39:22

I walked into town via a shortcut today, which meant going along footpaths and through a field where people walk their dogs. I got to a place where two paths meet and met a woman with three large dogs, two on lead and one not (but quite happily walking with the others). As the path is narrow there I stopped to let them go first, and the loose dog rushed at me barking, which made me jump. I smiled and said to the woman, "I wasn't expecting that!", trying to show I wasn't blaming her, and she gave me a filthy look and said, "She was reacting to you."

Was she BU? Or should I have done something different to let them by? I am not a dog person - not scared of them, just not really interested - so I could have got it wrong.

Limensoda Tue 19-Mar-19 13:42:08

She was being totally unreasonable and is an idiot. The dog should be on a lead if it does that.
Would it be ok if you hit her dog and then explained you were just reacting to it? I doubt she would think that's ok.

MulticolourMophead Tue 19-Mar-19 13:42:48

The woman should have had the dog on a lead.

Climbingahoneytree Tue 19-Mar-19 13:44:28

She was BU. You were very polite and that's a strange reaction by her.
I would never dream of saying something like that if ddog barked at somebody else. Sounds like an entitled asshole.
I come across quite a lot of them on walks with my dog- my dog will be on a lead (for no other reason than we are around livestock etc), theirs are off lead, come running up to ddog and growling/barking. I often get "he doesn't like medium sized/black/young/happy dogs". Control your animal.

Stayawayfromitsmouth Tue 19-Mar-19 13:46:29

Urgh, there's always one arsey person out there to ruin a lovely walk.
Apparently it takes over 17 good experiences to counteract the effect of 1 bad experience.

ThatFalseEquivalenceTho Tue 19-Mar-19 13:46:36

She was a dick.

I was leaving Nursery last week and got startled by a bloody Chihuahua grin It was just stood with its owner, barked at me. I absolutely crapped myself blush

mrsjoyfulprizeforraffiawork Tue 19-Mar-19 13:48:14

It doesn't seem as though she was surprised by the barking, so I think she should have had the dog on a lead too. I am a dog person and if I saw someone I thought my dog would "react to", I would have her on a lead well in advance of passing them. Dogs do react to people they think "suspicious" for some reason - a coat they are wearing, something about them that reminds them of someone who was horrible to them in the past, etc. However, the dogowner should know their dog's foibles and avoid alarming other people.

mrsjoyfulprizeforraffiawork Tue 19-Mar-19 13:49:00

Also, I would have apologised to you for my dog barking at you.

Anon10 Tue 19-Mar-19 13:49:28

She was being very unreasonable. She needs to learn that her dogs behaviour is her responsibility not someone else’s!

geekone Tue 19-Mar-19 13:50:47

My dog is a very random barker 9/10 or 99/100 even he will trot past a person, however if he fears for my safety (for no apparent reason) he barks. I am normally mortified he gets put on a lead and I apologise and grovel. He doesn’t growl or become aggressive he doesn’t leave my side he just gives a warning bark, but I still don’t blame the person.
That being said I am 100% sure that I prefer my giant dog protecting me when I am out walking alone.
Still silly woman.

hedwigge Tue 19-Mar-19 13:54:47

She was BU and probably didn't even register what you said before getting defensive, it's probably not the first time her loose dog has done that and many others wouldn't have been as polite as you were!

aliphil Tue 19-Mar-19 13:54:49

mrsjoyful most dog owners do apologise, in my experience, hence trying to make her not feel bad about it - clearly wasted effort in this case! In fact most of the dog owners I've met round here have been very nice, especially in the face of DD saying loudly how much she doesn't like dogs and trying to hide behind me. (She had a couple of scary experiences when she was younger. We're working on it ...)

There were several other dogs in the field off lead, all having so much fun they completely ignored me. smile

Sitdownstandup Tue 19-Mar-19 14:09:32

She's a fuckwit.

spritesobright Tue 19-Mar-19 14:22:42

She was being ridiculous and defensive. I had similar at the weekend when a dog that was off lead starting barking aggressively at us whilst hiking. The owner didn't seem at all bother and I told her that it had scared me. She answered, "oh don't worry, she's all bark, no bite."
Well how am I supposed to know that!?
Some dog owners seem to assume that just because they don't find their dog scary, neither should you. I have been bitten by a dog twice and so has DD so it is bloody scary!

mrsjoyfulprizeforraffiawork Tue 19-Mar-19 14:23:12

I totally accept that some people, like your daughter, OP, are afraid of dogs and I do keep a look out to see if someone is deliberately avoiding walking close to us or leaning away so I can be sure we don't go near them. I have a beef, however, with people who let their children rush directly up to unknown dogs or reach a hand out to pat a strange dog in passing - my dog is really scared of children (cruel treatment from children in the past) and will assume they are attacking us and, if I weren't ALWAYS super-vigilant to avoid these situations and always make detours off the path to stay out of reach, my dog would snarl at a child doing that. Also, children waving sticks near her reduces her to a quivering wreck. I wish their parents would stop them doing it near animals.

Dieu Tue 19-Mar-19 15:58:36

Dog owner here, and she was arsey. I have a lovely, friendly, harmless but ultimately naughty dog blush and I'm forever apologising for him. It wouldn't occur to me not to take responsibility (and mostly he's on the lead).

Easterbunnyiscomingsoon Tue 19-Mar-19 16:03:09

I was mobbed by 3 yappy things on extendable leads - left long - as I walked to my car opposite my front door.
No apology or attempt to shorten the leads.
I starred at the couple and asked how can they live with that din??
Rude, entitled people imo.
I have ddogs. On leads or put on at the first sign of another ddog or walker. As you should.

Notthecarwashagain Tue 19-Mar-19 16:09:28

My dog often occasionally barks at people (if they're standing too still hmm wearing a hat, carrying an umbrella...)
I'm aware that she may do this, so cross the road if I see someone I think will trigger her. She's also walked on a short lead which I have full control of.

I always apologise for her behaviour. It is completely our issue.

YANBU but the woman was probably embarrassed and defense.
Or just a bit of a nob!

Notthecarwashagain Tue 19-Mar-19 16:10:34

*defensive.
Now I'm embarrassed and defensive about my spelling. It's your fault, OP wink

recrudescence Tue 19-Mar-19 16:11:04

A dog that reacts in this way should be kept on a lead whenever it is likely to encounter people. Human needs, comfort and safety come first - and I say that as a lifelong dog owner/lover.

aliphil Tue 19-Mar-19 22:07:11

Sorry Notthecarwashagain. smile flowers

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