Ok, so this is a bit complicated.
We’re currently renovating our house. OH is overseeing the work, but due to DS’s asthma, me and the kids are spending periods of time at my parents house when there is a lot of dust etc.
OH doesn’t stay at my parents because he’s allergic to their dog, so he’s at home.
Obviously this means a lot of time apart (which we’re used to, he’s a shift worker).
He comes to my parents every night after work/building etc to see the kids, but AYCI, alone time is difficult. So we sometimes makes excuses that I am going home to “see what the builders have done that day”, and essentially we use that time for sex. We’re not talking daily here, maybe once/twice a week.
He has always got off on trying to sneak attempts to bring me off when there are people around, he tries it on under the table in restaurants etc, which I usually stop, depend on how public the situation is. It doesn’t do much for me but it usually sets the scene for later when we’ve alone.
Last night, he was trying to turn me on while we were watching telly at my parents house, during dinner. I was up for it but obviously not there and then, so I said “After dinner, let’s pop home and you can show me the timing done today.”
He tried it on again in the car. Got in, I went to make a move (we’re having a lot of quickies at the mo, for obvious reasons). He pushed me away and said “FFS, get off. I thought you wanted to see the tiles, I’m knackered and not interested.”
I was obviously upset, but didn’t want to push him.
He dropped me back at my parents (because obviously we had gone in his car), he said he would come in for a bit, within minutes, he was trying it on, discreetly, with my mum in the same room!
Obviously I slapped him away and my mum, I think, was oblivious, but it occurred to me, he does this a lot, gets me excited in an awkward situation, then goes cold when it’s no longer awkward.
Not sure if the problem is with him trying to make things a bit more exciting or me taking offence. He claims the latter.
I do most of the instigating anyway, when we do do it, he seems happy to only do it when it’s really not appropriate.
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AIBU?
Sex - who’s being selfish here?
98 replies
PhryneFisher · 16/03/2019 06:40
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