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Hen do price keeps increasing

(10 Posts)
LikeTheFruit Fri 15-Mar-19 18:53:33


I'm going on a hen do in a few weeks time and we've been paying for the activities individually rather than a full set amount to cover everything. Some people coming have been quite flaky and are dropping out of bits of the day (there's day activities, then travel to somewhere else for dinner, travel back and stay overnight, then breakfast next morning). Because people have dropped out of certain activities (despite originally saying they'd do them) the organisers keep asking for more money as the cost hasn't changed for the activity and therefore everyone's share has increased.

Today we got a message to say that we now owed more money for one of the activities (less than £10) as someone else has said they're not coming to the morning part. This is the 3rd price increase for this reason this month.

AIBU to refuse to pay the increase at such short notice (I know it's a small amount and I'll look petty)? I think that the people flaking out should have to pay their way as they'd originally agreed to all activities. Don't think it's fair for everyone else to suffer from the actions of others. Also feel bad for the bride as it's going to be like a revolving door or people arriving and leaving the whole time.

Has anyone else experienced this?

DoomOnTheBroom Fri 15-Mar-19 19:02:43

Could you open the event up to other people, see if any of the people going have a sister or friend they'd want to bring who could then cover the cost of the people who have dropped out?

Parly Fri 15-Mar-19 19:03:52

I wouldn't go at all. Why people arrange hen-do's or weddings and expect their guests to not just foot the expense and inconvenience but have the nerve to then follow up with reminders and increased costs is a joke.

That's why everyone else is dropping out. I'd follow suit or if you're nice and don't want to completely ditch just say you can't afford and won't pay any more extra cost.

Taking the absolute piss.

Drum2018 Fri 15-Mar-19 19:07:34

Those who committed to going originally should have to foot the bill. I wouldn't be paying a penny more.

Springwalk Fri 15-Mar-19 19:13:03

It sounds like a very badly organised event. It is all the different facets, people don’t not unsuslly enjoy being shunted from one thing to the next. One simple idea at a fixed price would have solved this.

Are you very close to the bride? If not I wouldn’t go, as I am guessing the price will go up even more.
I would message and say you can’t afford it, and as much as you would love to be there it’s just not possible.

You did agree a price and it has since increased three times, so not unreasonse. Feel sorry for the bride, it sounds like it may be a shambles on the day.

Eliza9917 Fri 15-Mar-19 19:16:08

They s is why its better just to go for a meal and drinks rather than a whole weekend of crap activities no one wants to do.

Hunter037 Fri 15-Mar-19 19:19:02

Has someone paid for the activities and you are all reimbursing her? If so she really should have asked for everyone's money up front and not given refunds.
If she hasn't paid for it yet could you suggest cancelling some of the activities to bring the cost down?

FormerlyFrikadela01 Fri 15-Mar-19 19:25:33

This is why I despise what hen and stag dos have become. A meal and drinks out in town has turned into multi activity overnight extravaganzas that cost everyone a fortune. People are "flaking out" becasue they probably can't afford yet felt at the time it was planned that they might be able to.

I wouldn't be paying any extra and if u was close to the bride would suggest a rethink of the whole plan to something a but more manageable.

SausageMashandOnionGravy Fri 15-Mar-19 19:31:09

You collect all the money as soon as things are booked, if not before. If you don’t have their money you are inviting people to change their minds and dropout, there’s no commitment. It’s poor organising.

LikeTheFruit Fri 15-Mar-19 19:38:29

Hi thanks for all the responses glad people don't think IBU. I am close to the bride so not going isn't really an option. I think the organiser has been refunding those who've dropped out which is very annoying.

I think I'll send a private message to organiser and refuse to pay any extra. Unfortunately I think it's going to be a bit of a disaster with all the to-ing and fro-ing.

This is exactly the reason for my own hen I stipulated a one day in our hometown with meal and drink - everyone invited came!

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