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to be a bit ambivalent about the Pads4Dads campaign..

(187 Posts)
BertrandRussell Fri 15-Mar-19 08:51:57

[https://www.heygirls.co.uk/pads-for-dads/ here]

On the one hand, obviously it’s great for fathers to be more involved and understanding, and obviously some girls don’t have a mum or an aunt or anyone. But I can’t help thinking that it’s all a bit cosmetic-a bit “hey look what a cool dad I am buying tampax” Ticking the “good dad” box. And what’s wrong with some things being women only anyway?

BertrandRussell Fri 15-Mar-19 08:52:37

sorry,here

lyralalala Fri 15-Mar-19 08:56:12

There are things that should be women only, but imo knowledge about periods isn’t one of them.

TheGoodEnoughWife Fri 15-Mar-19 08:56:37

You have answered your own question. Some things can't be women only because the person doesn't have a women to help them with it.

This is great - Dads should know and if this helps them start a conversation with their daughter then all good imo.

DoneLikeAKipper Fri 15-Mar-19 08:57:26

Perhaps they should rename it Get A Grip For Dads. The information is already out there, if they’re adult enough to look for it. As for the embarrassment of buying sanity products, how do they think girls and women manage it without cringing into the ground? No one gives a shit that you’re buying Tampax mate, even if you do have a mighty penis hmm.

It’s like a website version of Periods for Dummies, patronising and yet again making periods a ‘thing’ when it doesn’t need to be.

WorraLiberty Fri 15-Mar-19 08:57:27

I think it's a really good campaign.

It's always going to come into some criticism as all campaigns do. You can't please everyone.

And what’s wrong with some things being women only anyway?

You answered your own question in your OP. Some girls don't have any women close enough to them, to want to talk to them about periods.

Hot4Holes Fri 15-Mar-19 08:57:44

I can’t see the issue. I think it’s a great idea and can’t find much to criticise

WorraLiberty Fri 15-Mar-19 09:00:28

No one gives a shit that you’re buying Tampax mate, even if you do have a mighty penis hmm

See this ^^ sort of thing is what I mean by criticism.

There's a lot of information out there about everything but that doesn't mean campaigns don't have their place.

Also, there are still some cultures where girls/women are taught to be ashamed of their periods and I think campaigns like this, help to get rid of that stigma.

WeirdCatLady Fri 15-Mar-19 09:01:02

FFS, I remember even back in the 1970’s it was not astounding that my father would have no problem pop out to the shops if either his wife or one of two daughters needed sanpro buying, he was also a dab hand at bringing a nice hot toddy for period pain.

And now my husband does the same for me and his daughter. Surely it’s just normal?

It astounds me that anyone considers this a strange thing for a man to know about!

CrimpMyArse Fri 15-Mar-19 09:02:11

It looks awesome. I can’t see anything bad about it at all.

Might get a pack for my other half actually. It’s so normalised for Dads to be excluded either actively or unintentionally from those conversations.

JassyRadlett Fri 15-Mar-19 09:02:29

To be honest, the less that some things are ‘secret women’s business’ that make men feel icky and uncomfortable the easier it will be for women to be able to talk about these issues when they are affected - their husbands taking them seriously, being able to talk to male bosses about related health issues, etc. At some point if it’s out in the open a bit more doctors might even take health issues related to periods a little more seriously.

I don’t much care if a guy does this to tick the ‘good dad box’ (and wanting to be a better parent is surely something to be celebrated, not denigrated?) If the outcome is that he’s a more fully involved and supportive parent to his daughters, then that’s what matters.

KennDodd Fri 15-Mar-19 09:03:26

I think it's good. Apart from the 'Hey Girls' bit.

TheSerenDipitY Fri 15-Mar-19 09:04:11

lol this reminds me of my daughter... when she was 11 she went to Canada with her great grandfather, we packed pads in her luggage and explained that if t happens when shes away here they are etc etc etc, as soon as she got to Canada she explained it all to her great grand father and how shes got it covered and he wasnt to worry.... he was so mortified... not something hes ever discussed in his entire life id imagine

Littleraindrop15 Fri 15-Mar-19 09:06:06

I think it's great, educating men on periods and breaking that 'embarrassed' feeling around periods when it's part of life is a step forward for women.

I grew up quite embarrassed of periods and would feel uncomfortable if a boy or male was with me whilst picking up sanitary towels.. So I find this great

TixieLix Fri 15-Mar-19 09:08:08

My DDs 20yr old BF is great. If she couldn't get to the shop and needed pads urgently, he wouldn't bat an eyelid at going and getting them for her. I don't think we should wait until men are dads to teach them to be comfortable buying sanitary products. They should be taught when they are teenage boys that periods and sanitary products are normal and nothing to be embarrassed or ashamed of, so that they can support their future wives/partners/girlfriends/daughters.

SleepingStandingUp Fri 15-Mar-19 09:08:14

We think it’s a bit nuts that around half the population has a period almost every month, but that they can still be seen as secret and shameful
This!! So anything that works on that is surely a plus?

And what’s wrong with some things being women only anyway? because at 12 I was still financially dependent on my Dad. Internet didn't exist. Who exactly did you want to buy me sanitary towels and talk about it all? Who did you expect to buy me sanitary stuff?

It’s like a website version of Periods for Dummies, patronising and yet again making periods a ‘thing’ when it doesn’t need to be but they ARE a thing to the 7 - 16 Yr old whose just started having her period!

DoneLikeAKipper Fri 15-Mar-19 09:11:32

There's a lot of information out there about everything but that doesn't mean campaigns don't have their place.

Yes, but this campaign is some sort of men’s ‘safety zone’ of discussion of the ‘embarrassment’ of periods. It (to me) is undermining the whole push of ‘periods are normal’. Why on earth do men need a special campaign to understand periods?

I personally feel the whole thing is taking a step backwards, seems very ‘now blokes, we all know about women and their problems wink, but let’s do them a bit of a favour and learn a little bit about it, since you obviously totally switch off in biology/sex ed when it was first being taught’.

WolfhoundsofLove Fri 15-Mar-19 09:11:45

TheSerenDipitY grin that’s hilarious. This campaign is bloody great imo.

WorraLiberty Fri 15-Mar-19 09:12:27

Exactly Sleeping of course they're a 'thing' and they're a much bigger thing to embarrassed girls and boys.

Hence the need for this really good campaign.

Ghanagirl Fri 15-Mar-19 09:12:30

@TheSerenDipitY
Your daughter sends sweet😊

Ghanagirl Fri 15-Mar-19 09:12:44

Sounds!

SleepingStandingUp Fri 15-Mar-19 09:14:14

Perhaps they should rename it Get A Grip For Dads. The information is already out there, if they’re adult enough to look for it

Presumably whenever anyone in here asks how to get red wine out of their top or if this constitutes abuse or anything in between, you tell them to get a grip and the information is already out there too?

Njordsgrrrl Fri 15-Mar-19 09:14:33

I'm on the fence too. It often astounds me how much women do shield from men, leading to the that teacher telling a girl to "just hold it in" gin

And then I imagine how different it would be if it was the other way round. They'd probably get super competitive about it and swagger around in giant pads to draw attention to it.

WorraLiberty Fri 15-Mar-19 09:15:24

To be honest DoneLikeAKipper you're coming across on this thread as just quite derisive of men in general.

It seems no matter what they do, you're going to get angry and be a bit prejudiced about it.

DoneLikeAKipper Fri 15-Mar-19 09:15:50

but they ARE a thing to the 7 - 16 Yr old whose just started having her period!

Yes, my point was that it shouldn’t be a thing for any grown adult to talk about or even worry talking about. Adults are there to put the young girl at ease and shouldn’t need an entire campaign directed at them to do so.

Babdoc Fri 15-Mar-19 09:17:52

There used to be very definite stigma and embarrassment about purchasing sanpro in the 1970’s.
When I was ill, my boyfriend (later DH) went to Boots to buy tampons for me. The girl on the till raised her eyebrows at him and pulled a puzzled smirk.
DH was autistic, so lacked the social conditioning and embarrassment of the times. He beamed and explained cheerily:” It’s okay, they’re not for me. I haven’t got a nosebleed or anything!”
The girl apparently turned crimson and hastily flung them in a bag!
I think all dads should learn to be matter of fact about periods. Girls have enough sexist shit to cope with growing up, without having to hide sanpro from men and be ashamed of menstruation.

BertrandRussell Fri 15-Mar-19 09:18:00

Of course men and boys should know about periods. And of course men shout be cool about buying “supplies”- my dad was and he was born in 1918!. And when I said “women only” I didn’t mean women’s secrets. I’m finding it hard to explain my ambivalence. I suppose I think there are loads of ways men should be encouraged to be better dads before this particular one. Nitcombing4dads. Fillinginfamilycalendar4dads. Christmasshopping4dads.
<Awaits barrage of my dp is the best nitcomber EVER! posts>

thecatsthecats Fri 15-Mar-19 09:19:06

These men aren't only dads. They are men with female friends, female bosses, and female employees. Damn right they should understand about periods, and not see them as icky and secret.

My dad was great in general with us on 'female stuff' - in fact, both my parents came from traditional backgrounds, but he really wasn't phased by getting involved in the 'new fangled' girly stuff like clothes and personal care. I remember him grabbing me in M&S to look at some bras because he was more interested in the fact they were on sale for £3 to be worried about being embarrassed, and he was the one who helped me with my blackheads.

Come to think of it, my mum made him ask where my boyfriend would be sleeping when he came to visit! She thoroughly swerved all of that stuff.

SleepingStandingUp Fri 15-Mar-19 09:19:37

4 in 10 Dads never learnt about periods at school

“Only 41% of Dads say they feel comfortable talking about periods with their kids, and nearly half haven’t chatted to their daughters about them”

45% of Dads are unsure what the signs are that a girl might be about to start her period

DoneLikeAKipper Fri 15-Mar-19 09:20:53

It seems no matter what they do, you're going to get angry and be a bit prejudiced about it.

Categorically not. I think it’s unfair to the many men who already manage to not make a big deal of periods, and as I said it’s patronising that they have to have their own ‘special campaign’ to get information that’s already out there. I find it another example of babying and spoon feeding information to blokes that women had to figure out themselves without getting a pat on the head for being so ‘aware’.

ghostyslovesheets Fri 15-Mar-19 09:21:25

See I’m not sure why we need a campaign to educate men about periods- 50% of the population have them and men need to bloody educate themselves (no pun intended) it’s like it’s some magic lady secret we are finally letting them in on

I understand the sentiment but it’s periods not nuclear physics do they need a campaign to understand it?

ghostyslovesheets Fri 15-Mar-19 09:22:27

Or what ‘Done like a kipper’ said

DoneLikeAKipper Fri 15-Mar-19 09:25:05

4 in 10 Dads never learnt about periods at school

I’m not sure what generation we’re talking about here, in every sex education and biology lessons we had from the age of around 10, periods were never discussed with only the girls, they were for everyone (I’m in my 30s now). Either that was only the schools I attended, and 60% of them weren’t listening, or they still don’t teach most boys about periods in schools which definitely needs addressing asap.

WeepingWillowWeepingWino Fri 15-Mar-19 09:27:51

yes, isn't this just part of dads being a fully functioning member of the family? Only that's so unusual they need a campaign and a pat on the back?

Sorting out sanpro for daughters is one tiny part of the wifework that so many women do. There's a thread in AIBU right now from a woman about dumping her husband and is it OK for her to leave his family's cards (which she'd always done because he would forget) to him. And the first response is that she should leave it to him - but she should write him out a list.

It's an indication of the absolutely low standards society has of men in a household. And we should be thrilled with the crumbs we get.

Itwouldtakemuchmorethanthis Fri 15-Mar-19 09:28:03

Not adding no anything to our list fe experience. Dh is an adult. He knows what a period is and can purchase whatever he likes in shops.

BertrandRussell Fri 15-Mar-19 09:28:50

Another thing- I don’t like this constant use of “bloody”. Not, obviously, because it’s a swear word, but because it seems to be making it ladsy.

diddl Fri 15-Mar-19 09:29:04

"spoon feeding information to blokes that women had to figure out themselves "

Yup-women don't inherently know how to cook, keep a house clean & tidy, look after a newborn-but it seems to be expected of them.

DoneLikeAKipper Fri 15-Mar-19 09:29:35

it’s like it’s some magic lady secret we are finally letting them in on

Actually, this very much summarises my thoughts on the matter. Periods were never a secret, the information was always available, I just don’t understand why it needs to be put in a ‘man-friendly way’ now. Just feels like a bit of a hindrance on progression, for both sex.

BertrandRussell Fri 15-Mar-19 09:29:55

Birthdaycards4dads.....

WorraLiberty Fri 15-Mar-19 09:30:04

I think most people will agree a campaign shouldn't be necessary but from that link, it seems it is.

So imo it's all good.

I grew up with a very old fashioned Irish Catholic mother, who only every referred to periods as 'the other things' and even that was in a half whispered voice grin

So with that in mind, it's no wonder my dad probably doesn't know much about periods and what my brothers know, they learned from their wives and girlfriends.

SleepingSloth Fri 15-Mar-19 09:33:14

I think it's a great campaign and don't see anything to be negative about.

I think it’s unfair to the many men who already manage to not make a big deal of periods, and as I said it’s patronising that they have to have their own ‘special campaign’ to get information that’s already out there.

My OH doesn't make a big deal out of periods and he doesn't think the campaign is unfair or patronising. He knows men that quite frankly are pathetic, squeamish and embarrassed to talk or acknowledge periods so he hopes it helps them become a bit more adult about it. I've never really understood men's embarrassment of periods (or women's) but I know it exists so anything that helps normalise them for those people is only ever going to be a good thing.

Fabaunt Fri 15-Mar-19 09:33:25

I love this campaign. Periods are a fact of life. I think it’s great dads are being made more knowledgeable about periods, because not all girls will have a female in her life, and also, because it’s nothing to be ashamed of, it’s a natural bodily reaction.
My partner would think nothing of going picking me up a box of tampons or pads. When we have a daughter, I’d be confident that he would do the same for her.

JassyRadlett Fri 15-Mar-19 09:36:32

Perhaps they should rename it Get A Grip For Dads. The information is already out there, if they’re adult enough to look for it

And of course, we should not have campaigns to encourage people to stop smoking, eat better, exercise, save into a pension, pay their tax on time or anything else. Because the info is there if they want to look for it.

Or perhaps campaigns are also about shifting attitudes and behaviour, not just imparting information. 🤔

NewGrandad Fri 15-Mar-19 09:37:25

No one gives a shit that you’re buying Tampax mate, even if you do have a mighty penis

This is part of the problem! I remember in the 70's and 80's being sent to the local shop with a note from my mum. Handed the note over and was given a package back wrapped in newspaper which I dutifully returned to my mum.

Nowadays I don't think twice about buying pads for my wife as long as I know which ones to buy.

Cwtches123 Fri 15-Mar-19 09:38:10

I can see far more things to be positive about than negative - great idea!

JacquesHammer Fri 15-Mar-19 09:38:22

I suppose I think there are loads of ways men should be encouraged to be better dads before this particular one. Nitcombing4dads. Fillinginfamilycalendar4dads. Christmasshopping4dads

See the thing is, decent dads like my ex did all that (apart from nits, we never had a visit grin).

When DD got older he asked me to recommend some brands to have in, in readiness for DD starting her periods. He wasn’t embarrassed, just something he didn’t have first hand experience of. So I said “avoid scented, look for X” etc.

He understands fully how periods work, it was very much about him wanting to make DD as comfortable as possible and therefore asking for advice.

I don’t have any issue with the campaign.

JacquesHammer Fri 15-Mar-19 09:40:29

Interestingly ex-PIL would have been very much a “don’t talk about it type” whereas my dad was always available for chatting, buying tampons etc.

WeepingWillowWeepingWino Fri 15-Mar-19 09:40:44

A better campaign would be one that sought to steer women away from setting up home with useless men.

SleepingSloth Fri 15-Mar-19 09:40:55

Yup-women don't inherently know how to cook, keep a house clean & tidy, look after a newborn-but it seems to be expected of them.

But to be fair, many men in past generations have been 'sheltered' from periods. Our mothers did whisper about them because their mothers also did. It was something for women to keep secret. I never have, they're a part of life so my OH isn't embarrassed by them and hopefully my son won't be either. It takes a bit of time to change behaviours and thinking but I think our children's generation will be very different about periods as they are with many other things.

Sparklingbrook Fri 15-Mar-19 09:41:06

Looks like a good thing to me.

SleepingSloth Fri 15-Mar-19 09:41:56

A better campaign would be one that sought to steer women away from setting up home with useless men.

Well, yes. grin

thecatsthecats Fri 15-Mar-19 09:42:35

Either that was only the schools I attended, and 60% of them weren’t listening, or they still don’t teach most boys about periods in schools which definitely needs addressing asap.

I am 30, and in my school, they separated us out, and girls and boys were taught about their personal changes differently (and samples of different products given to each group). Only sex ed about actual sex was done jointly. I got a frosty response from the leader for saying that if someone didn't want to have sex then they could abstain.

DH is also 30. He went to a boys school. They only covered periods in an abstract fashion (e.g. menstruation cycle) - there was literally no mention of period pains, or the products needed to care for it.

Margot33 Fri 15-Mar-19 09:45:25

I think it's a great idea. Some children don't have a mum. Why not empower dads to be able to guide their daughters through an important time of their life.

TheFallenMadonna Fri 15-Mar-19 09:45:49

I sort of agree with BertrandRussell, in that I think it is probably easier to get buy in from uninvolved fathers for parenting activities which are part of a "taboo busting" discourse than for those which are just work. Like nitcombing and Christmas elfing.

It's not a criticism of the campaign. It's just a thing.

Weetabixandshreddies Fri 15-Mar-19 09:46:41

it’s patronising that they have to have their own ‘special campaign’ to get information that’s already out there. I find it another example of babying and spoon feeding information to blokes that women had to figure out themselves without getting a pat on the head for being so ‘aware’.

So the sessions at school, where girls are taught about periods is an example of babying and spoon feeding them is it?

Or the latest campaign about cervical screening? Babying and spoon feeding women?

Information about these issues is already out there so why can't women just find it out for themselves?

People moan that men don't know about periods, or make it difficult for women at work because they don't appreciate the practical issues and then others argue that some things should be "women only".

Too bad for girls who live with their dads I guess?

rosesandcashmere Fri 15-Mar-19 09:46:50

I started my period after my mum died when I was young. My dad didn't give two shits about going to buy me sanitary stuff, because he was a grown up. Same with OH now. Not sure why it's needed but I guess better to have it than not.

Rixera Fri 15-Mar-19 09:47:38

Perhaps sometime it won't be necessary, then, but right now it is. Maybe all these lovely men in this thread are part of something game-changing.

But neither my mum or dad would talk about periods. My ex was alright about it, but OH gets very awkward & embarrassed. I want my DD to be comfortable about it in her dad's house. I want, much further down the line, her to be able to ask her stepdad if I'm out and she needs pads.

We shouldn't still need this campaign and maybe next generation we won't, but right now we do.

Hoppinggreen Fri 15-Mar-19 09:49:50

I mentioned it to DH and he was amazed something like this would be necessary. He’s never had an issue buying sanitary products or anything else for me and I’m sure he would for DD.
He did grow up as the only boy in an extended family though, so periods hold no mystery for him

Insecure123 Fri 15-Mar-19 09:50:18

Reading this has actually just made me think back to learning about periods in school - I am early 30's and I disctinctly remember it being girls only. We were in the libraray - I can't remember if we were told "girls only to go to the library" or the whole class was there and the boys got sent out. But it was definitely girls only - now whether or not the boys got a "watered down" version in another room while were shown how much liquid tampons can absorb by putting them in a jar of water I don't know but it was definitel just girls in the room.

Mummyoflittledragon Fri 15-Mar-19 09:52:36

Let’s get the bloody conversation flowing
I think this campaign in the main is great. This phrase above is too much. I don’t like the insinuation having a chat about them is in some way comparable to going through periods. Also don’t like the language around trans... magical thinking.

SausageMashandOnionGravy Fri 15-Mar-19 09:53:04

I don’t really see the point/issue, my husband goes and buys me tampons and he knows what periods are, I mean what else does he need?

This might have been a thing for my grandad’s generation (he’d be over 100 if he was still alive) where you really couldn’t discuss things like this but today when everyone is very open about this kind of thing anyway I don’t see what it adds?

WeepingWillowWeepingWino Fri 15-Mar-19 09:53:50

I don't have a problem with girls and boys being taught these things separately, but boys certainly do need to know and understand about periods. If for no other reason that they don't grow up into wanker employers who have issues with female staff taking time of for excruciating and heavy periods, thus proving the point that even in 2019 working women are shoehorned into an environment designed by and for men, with a few tweaks.

Meandmetoo Fri 15-Mar-19 09:53:58

It's rare for me, but im really split down the middle on this one!

On one hand I think it's got to be a good thing as imo some blokes are utterly useless when it comes to this and probably wouldnt want to Google "periods young girls" (or possibly like my dp who pointblank refuses to use the internet for anything), and it might be reassuring for young girls to know this campaign exists. But on the other hand I can imagine some men strutting into a shop and thinking they are the dogs bollocks for buying tampons and being all "look at me checkout ladies, buying Tampax for my daughter"

Even now I'm switching between great and eye roll. Ooooh this feels weird!

JacquesHammer Fri 15-Mar-19 09:54:11

The thing is, if the men in your life don’t need this campaign, then great.

If some men do, and it makes a positive difference to them as fathers and partners, where’s the negative?

Weetabixandshreddies Fri 15-Mar-19 09:55:14

I'm assuming everyone criticizing also knows exactly how the male body works? How it works, what can go wrong, symptoms etc? Mums talk to sons about testicular self examination and how to do it and what to look for?

If not, why not? The info is out there and it's something that boys need to be aware of.

JellyBaby666 Fri 15-Mar-19 09:55:47

I think this is BRILLIANT. I am very lucky I had my mum and my auntie nearby to go to about periods and puberty, but I was still mortified and unsure, I can't imagine how confusing it would be to be raised by your Dad without a strong female presence (100 children a day are bereaved by a sibling or parent, a huge group of people who may lose a female role model they would love to talk things through with) and your Dad not to be clued up on something as common as periods! Anything that informs, reduces stigma, and helps ensure the young girls who need some parental guidance to support them gets it is a winner in my book!

PrawnOfCreation Fri 15-Mar-19 09:56:08

Pfft. Pat on the back to the men who don't neglect their daughters hygiene needs. I can see why we need a campaign, but it's a low bar to brag about isn't it.

WorraLiberty Fri 15-Mar-19 09:59:59

The campaign is about so much more than just popping to the shop for a pack of pads/tampons.

RockyFlintstone Fri 15-Mar-19 10:01:24

But on the other hand I can imagine some men strutting into a shop and thinking they are the dogs bollocks for buying tampons and being all "look at me checkout ladies, buying Tampax for my daughter"

Lol, yeah it's the type of thing a certain ilk of man would put all over social media.

I think overall this a good. Its a bit patronising and I do think blokes could probably just get off their arse and do this anyway, but it's a positive step I think.

My DH is fine to buy tampax but he gets 'overwhelmed' at the choice and is always worried he will get the wrong one so I have to send him a photo of the specific one I want and emphasise many times that they must be UNSCENTED!!!

SleepingSloth Fri 15-Mar-19 10:02:01

So the sessions at school, where girls are taught about periods is an example of babying and spoon feeding them is it?

Exactly Weetabixandshreddies. There is information on absolutely everything nowadays on the Internet but that doesn't mean that we shouldn't teach people about things and expect people to find everything out for themselves. Campaigns do work for increasing awareness of things that many people are already aware of.

I'm sure I'll get flamed for this but I think some women don't want men to move forward so that they can keep saying that women get such a bad deal in life. My mum would try to stop my OH doing a weekly food shop as it was apparently not a mans job.🙄 Then she would go on about how useless men were. There's some really useless men who will probably always be useless but there are many good men and many men that want to be better about things like this.

ZippyBungleandGeorge Fri 15-Mar-19 10:04:44

My dad is in his late sixties and has no embarrassment buying sanpro , when I lived at home he did the weekly grocery shop and would just ask me which kind I wanted (different to my mum) , DH and DB are the same. If in doubt they'd probably just buy regular and buy towels and tampons just in case. I funny know that there s need for this, maybe twenty or thirty years ago more men found it embarrassing but not now. There will be some girls being raised by single dads so it's helpful for them but that's a relatively small demographic.

NewGrandad Fri 15-Mar-19 10:05:15

@RockyFlintstone

My DH is fine to buy tampax but he gets 'overwhelmed' at the choice and is always worried he will get the wrong one

That is me! Why do you women have to be so complicated? grin

BertrandRussell Fri 15-Mar-19 10:05:56

“I'm sure I'll get flamed for this but I think some women don't want men to move forward so that they can keep saying that women get such a bad deal in life.”
Don’t know about anyone else-but that’s certainly not my thinking.

Insecure123 Fri 15-Mar-19 10:07:21

But on the other hand I can imagine some men strutting into a shop and thinking they are the dogs bollocks for buying tampons and being all "look at me checkout ladies, buying Tampax for my daughter"

Loling at this

Hugtheduggee Fri 15-Mar-19 10:08:06

It shouldn't be necessary - much better that boys and girls learn from a young age, and it is totally normalised, but given some men's lack of knowledge, it is a good and necessary campaign.

My husband sometimes gets bamboozled with the choice of sabpro, but isn't embarrassed about it. Years ago on holiday I got caught short (had totally forgotten my period) but my husband had packed some emergency tampons whilst sorting toiletries, because he thought I was probably due on soon, so just in case.

Meandmetoo Fri 15-Mar-19 10:08:50

Yea that's it rocky! Can picture them taking a selfie with the packet and hashtagging it on FB with loads of "oh such a good dad" comments.

I often see men in Tesco dithering around the sanitary towels looking confused, sometimes i discreetly ask if they want a hand and they look like they could cry with relief, one asked me once if the various sizes referred to the size of the....ahem........you know grin confused

Weetabixandshreddies Fri 15-Mar-19 10:08:54

I'm sure I'll get flamed for this but I think some women don't want men to move forward so that they can keep saying that women get such a bad deal in life.

So much this. Same as when people moan about OH not doing something, then when they do it they get moaned at for not doing it properly (they've done a perfectly good job, just not the way that their partner does it). That then gives the partner the opportunity to die on the alter of martyrdom by complaining that they have to do everything.

Parent19876 Fri 15-Mar-19 10:09:05

I think it's a fantastic thing...
A lot of the men who are having teenagers were never taught anything about female reproductivity, and might be too ashamed to reach out, they could have lost a spouse, etc etc. There are so many different reasons.
This just opens up the airwaves so much, and gets rid of the taboo that is unfortunately still floating around.
Yes, I think sex ed is becoming more and more an open subject, and hopefully the generations to come won't have the issue, but for the older generations (or those who haven't had the resources) it's absolutely fantastic.

Ceebs85 Fri 15-Mar-19 10:10:04

I think it's bloody (haha) brilliant.

Insecure123 Fri 15-Mar-19 10:13:18

Yea that's it rocky! Can picture them taking a selfie with the packet and hashtagging it on FB with loads of "oh such a good dad" comments.

I think the hashtags would go along the lines of #realman #topdad/husband #nobigdeal and sit back and wait for all the likes and welldones lol

Sorry it's not fair to want to encourage men in this aspect then rip them at the mere notion that they might but it did make me chuckle!

I am quite sure the campaign will give help and support where it is needed and I can only see that as a good thing

MadCattery Fri 15-Mar-19 10:13:23

My former husband would pick them up whenever needed. He said "People know they aren't for me. So, it's like a big neon sign saying I HAVE A WOMAN!" He had a great sense of humor.

cranstonmanor Fri 15-Mar-19 10:22:33

Most men I know are fine with buying sanpro.... I must have found my people.

I remember my dad telling about the time he went to get condoms. An hour later he went back for sanpro and lice treatment. The woman at the till joked that his weekend plans were shot. He just had a good laugh about it.

RockyFlintstone Fri 15-Mar-19 10:25:08

Yea that's it rocky! Can picture them taking a selfie with the packet and hashtagging it on FB with loads of "oh such a good dad" comments.

I thought the 'of daughters' had done this so I had a look and lo and behold!

It's more of a stealth boast than an outright one, but still grin

BertrandRussell Fri 15-Mar-19 10:26:35

I don’t line the “bloody conversation flowing” language. And I am pretty sure the average 10 year old wouldn’t either.

BertrandRussell Fri 15-Mar-19 10:28:24

Mind you @RockyFlintstone- maybe reading the campaign literature might be a good idea before you write your next book. Vaginal lids, indeed!

Meandmetoo Fri 15-Mar-19 10:29:37

He's missing the chocolate bar off that tray hmm grin

PinkBuffalo Fri 15-Mar-19 10:33:24

I feel I was so lucky to have my dad who dealt with all the period drama when I went went though it. My mum was/is severely disabled so wasn't able to do this. Dad was not phased at all and when I was getting stressed at talking to him about he just said "look, I've been married twice, I've dealt with all this before so don't worry" and we had a good laugh. He did all the bedding washing etc when leaks happened without blinking an eye. Even as an adult, he would commiserate with me when it was a bad month.
I imagine a girl who isn't as lucky to have a dad such as mine, and if this would help her dad/uncle/grandad or whoever looks after her, then it can only be a good thing?
Probably why I'm never going to have a partner - no man could possibly live up to be the man my dad was

ClaireElizabethBeuchampFraser Fri 15-Mar-19 10:36:55

There are single Dads out there, taking care of their dd’s alone, with no Mother to talk to their dd’s about periods! This campaign is perfect for those Dads! Not every family is the same, if a Dad is covering both the Mum role and the Dad role, then I think it’s fantastic that there are people out there who care enough to support them!

It’s not about praising men for buying pads, it’s about helping Dads who have to support their daughters alone. I intend to send it to my dh, I have talked periods with my dd (9) and will discuss it with her whenever she needs to. But I think it’s important that if my dd is out with her Dad and starts, that he knows how to support her.

RockyFlintstone Fri 15-Mar-19 10:39:02

Mind you @RockyFlintstone- maybe reading the campaign literature might be a good idea before you write your next book. Vaginal lids, indeed!

What do you mean Bertrand, cervix grabbing is totally a thing isn't it?! 😂

ClaireElizabethBeuchampFraser Fri 15-Mar-19 10:39:35

PinkBuffalo your post warmed my heart! I am severely disabled and my dh is an amazing Daddy/ Dad to my dd and ds! I hope my dd continues to love and treasure her Daddy, the way you clearly treasure your Dad!

RockyFlintstone Fri 15-Mar-19 10:42:27

I feel I was so lucky to have my dad who dealt with all the period drama when I went went though it.

'Period drama' reminds me of when DH and I first started going out and were at it a lot, and then when I had my period I would wear Pyjamas as a 'not tonight hun' signal, and he used to say I was in 'period costume' grin

Your dad sounds awesome by the way, there are loads of great guys out there smile

KittyMarrion Fri 15-Mar-19 10:51:50

Unfortunately we do need campaigns like this. I'm saying that not because I think it's cringey but because of the stigma attached to periods. Because of period poverty, because of missed days of school due to periods and because we have to pay fucking Vat on on sanitary protection. These are all feminist issues and we need to be fucking furious about them in order to facilitate change. Of course it impacts on men too so why shouldn't they be part of the solution. If you feel embarrassed by it you need to ask yourself why. Periods are an everyday thing and should be no more shameful than having a cold.

KittyMarrion Fri 15-Mar-19 10:56:55

@worraliberty I completely agree with that there is a lot more to this than buying a few pads.

SleepingStandingUp Fri 15-Mar-19 11:03:36

I find it another example of babying and spoon feeding information to blokes that women had to figure out themselves without getting a pat on the head for being so ‘aware’ so you disagree with any programmes around breast cancer, cervical / ovarian cancer, domestic abuse, period poverty, FGM too? I mean, the info is out there. We shouldn't need posters and promotions about this stuff, wo can just go Google it.

WeepingWillowWeepingWino Fri 15-Mar-19 11:07:53

Kitty I agree with you but really the whole thing needs to be much more radical, and I think what some women on this thread are depressed about is how congratulatory so many women are about this campaign. I can see that there are many crap and useless men, husbands, fathers, out there who need this kind of thing rammed down their throat but I'm buggered if I'm going to celebrate that fact - that we have the bar set so low for men in our society.

KittyMarrion Fri 15-Mar-19 11:14:31

WeepingWillow nor am I going to congratulate men for talking about periods, buying tampons or looking after their own children. I agree that should be the norm unfortunately at the moment it's not and we have to accept reality as it is not fight against it. Plus who holds all the power in our society? White, Middle class, cis gendered men. So if some change starts on this issue with them even if some people feel it is a bit smug isn't it better than nothing. Periods are still a massive taboo.

JacquesHammer Fri 15-Mar-19 11:16:57

I agree with you but really the whole thing needs to be much more radical, and I think what some women on this thread are depressed about is how congratulatory so many women are about this campaign

I wouldn’t say I’m congratulatory. In an ideal world would it be needed? Absolutely not.

That said, if the campaign does make a difference to the lives of young girls/women I won’t complain about it.

KittyMarrion Fri 15-Mar-19 11:20:05

That's how I feel JacquesHammer.

Eliza9917 Fri 15-Mar-19 11:25:14

That website just creeped me out.

"Tampons can be painful to use at first, don't push it"

And what the fuck is in the kit for dads?

The whole thing is a bit cringe.

DoneLikeAKipper Fri 15-Mar-19 11:27:31

so you disagree with any programmes around breast cancer, cervical / ovarian cancer, domestic abuse, period poverty, FGM too? I mean, the info is out there. We shouldn't need posters and promotions about this stuff, wo can just go Google it.

Yes, but those campaigns are not specific to one sex are they? They don’t campaign for breast cancer awareness ‘just for women’, for example. Or should we have to specifically say ‘for men’ as a separate campaign for each of those things, just for them to ‘get it’?

Campaign for information on periods and breaking taboo certainly, make sure that education on the matter is equally taught in all schools, absolutely. I just think it’s not to be applauded that we have to add a ‘for men’ aspect about something that is affecting half of the entire human population, for a minority to actually pay attention or learn about periods.

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