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How to leave a cliquey mums WhatsApp group

(58 Posts)
Lapetitemaz Thu 14-Mar-19 12:08:40

Hi mums

I’m after some advice. My twins are in reception and at the start of term some of the cliquey mums set up a What’sapp group and added me to it.

Over the course of the school year I’ve taken a step back from the group and declined social invites with them as I’m increasingly uncomfortable with how cliquey and also bitchy it’s becoming. I want no part of this. What’s also made it awkward is that someone added into the group chat a mum who is notorious for bitching/gossiping/back-stabbing (she did this to me friend) and I just do not trust this girl at all as can already see her working her usual tricks on some of these mums.

I guess what I’m asking is does anyone suggest a polite message I can send to explain why I’m leaving the group?! Or do you think not say anything. I don’t want to make a big deal out of it (and give any more reason for bitchiness!)

Thank you

shamelesshackney Thu 14-Mar-19 12:51:59

I did this. I just said I was taking a bit of a social media break and it was fine.

NCforthis2019 Thu 14-Mar-19 12:52:07

Mute notifications.

CookPassBabtridge Thu 14-Mar-19 12:53:42

Yes to muting notifications, it might even have an ignore feature which puts it in your archive folder so you don't see the chat in your list. But everyone is unaware you're ignoring it.

AuntVanya Thu 14-Mar-19 12:55:15

Just leave and if anyone asks, say you've given up social media for Lent ( or you're having a digital detox).

thedisorganisedmum Thu 14-Mar-19 12:55:28

Mute or leave, what's the big deal?

I really don't like people who feel the need to make a big announcement when they leave a group, screams of drama-llama.

BigButtonsOnMyPhone Thu 14-Mar-19 12:58:14

If you feel you have to say anything, just say you are simplifying your use of social media.

CheeseRolls Thu 14-Mar-19 13:02:17

Delete WhatsApp

Mummyoflittledragon Thu 14-Mar-19 13:05:24

I am in a chat group with all the parents on WhatsApp in dds year. It got started by a mum, whose friend and ds were having a whole year big party and has been useful. People asking does anyone have x for a costume, what’s the spellings this week, about a school trip etc. It’s not posted on loads. The other way to go about this is to add everyone, whose numbers you know under the guise of something or other to do with school. That will stop the bitching and if they set up another group, they aren’t likely to add you to it as you add all and sundry.

winsinbin Thu 14-Mar-19 13:06:18

I agree. Leave the group now without any reasons or excuses. If anyone asks tell them you got fed up of WhatsApp.

AguerosAngel Thu 14-Mar-19 13:06:59

Another one here for just muting the group! However nicely you word an exit message it will cause drama by the sounds of it!

TeaforTwoBiscuitOrThree Thu 14-Mar-19 13:09:15

Mute or archive the group.

shinyNewPound Thu 14-Mar-19 13:11:32

There are two groups I mute regularly. Just mute.

Lapetitemaz Thu 14-Mar-19 13:17:40

Thanks for the advice ladies! I’m definitely not after any drama at all so will mute the group and archive too.

The girls are not actively excluding me on the group but they do exclude in the playground- which quite honestly just makes me glad to be more distant from them.

School playgrounds huh?!

EerieSilence Thu 14-Mar-19 13:26:26

Open the group - Click on top of it where the numbers are - open Group Info - click on Exit Group.
Instant relief.

Graziass Thu 14-Mar-19 13:29:17

Mute and archive but don't leave in case you want to stalk at some point wink

RomanyQueen1 Thu 14-Mar-19 13:38:15

Just leave and make a point of saying it's because you are cutting back on social media as too busy to post, that's if you don't want a fuss.

SausageMashandOnionGravy Thu 14-Mar-19 13:41:43

Mute and stop replying, it'll just get pushed down your conversation list and you won't see when anyone has posted in there. Or just leave the group... Say nothing the end.

AtLeastThreeDrinks Thu 14-Mar-19 13:59:51

I'd just archive it; if you mute you can still see how many messages have been sent and there's too much temptation to read them. Archive, and if anyone asks in person just say you're trying to cut down screen time and figured anything important would be sent one on one.

Group messages can be really intrusive if they blow up at an inconvenient time and then you have to play catch up. Worse still if it's people you don't even want to chat to!

DannyDyersPants Thu 14-Mar-19 14:40:19

Mute notifications then every so often clear the chat without reading.

DannyDyersPants Thu 14-Mar-19 14:41:58

I think if you archive, the chat comes back again if someone sends a message? I could be wrong on this and if I am, let me know as there are quite a few group chats I need to archive!!

BitchQueen90 Thu 14-Mar-19 15:04:04

I'd just leave. But then I'm not bothered about what other people say about me to be honest.

Thistles24 Thu 14-Mar-19 16:00:37

I did similar. Waited until nothing had been posted for a couple of days, so it wouldn’t look like I’d taken offence to anyone in particular, and just left the group. No big drama, still talk to the ones that are sensible, but the amount of drama and teacher bashing that was going on was horrible.

MrsJayy Thu 14-Mar-19 16:04:37

Just say as suggested you have trouble keeping up with groups and leave. You say they are bitchy are you worried they will turn on you ? Doesit matter if they like you or not

CuppaSarah Thu 14-Mar-19 16:05:17

I'd just say you're not really using WhatsApp and am leaving the group as you're just not keeping up with it. Needn't be a drama. No one likes someone lurking silently on WhatsApp groups

Aeroflotgirl Thu 14-Mar-19 16:08:06

Just exit it, simple as that.

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