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AIBU?

To ask you about the times your brain has completely betrayed you and made you look a fool!

142 replies

SweetMangoPie · 13/03/2019 15:01

I've just very nearly told a client I loved them at the end of a phone call because I'm so used to saying it to DH and now I feel all flustered.

I regularly have little brain farts like this. Quite often if I'm waiting on hold for someone to pick up the phone at work I end up drifting off and when they do finally pick up, I answer as if they've called me.. 'Good afternoon, SweetMangos Workplace, Can I help?' ... Cue awkward silence.

Tell me some of your stupid brain moments!

OP posts:
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ChanandlerBongsLeftShoe · 14/03/2019 10:01

I do stupid things like this all the time. It's like I have baby brain with no baby sometimes!

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DrBuckles · 14/03/2019 10:03

I told a group of people that I was DH’s husband the other day. I didn’t even notice I’d done it!

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GottenGottenGotten · 14/03/2019 10:10

When I worked two jobs, I answered the phone with the wrong workplace name. Then said 'no. No, that's not right'. Thankfully the person on the other end of the phone laughed.

On the other side of the coin, I once phoned my solicitor, and the person that answered the phone answered it with the name of a competing local law firm. I knew I had dialled the right number, as it was on my phone.

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GottenGottenGotten · 14/03/2019 10:15

Can't be as bad as the story told on Graham Norton by, iirc, Stephen Mangan.

He was at an event and saw Robert De Niro, who he very much admired, and thought he would take the chance to say hello.

He goes up to him and said 'Hi, I'm Robert De Niro'.

RDN replied 'no, I'm Robert De Niro'.

SM said, 'yes, of course you are' and walked away mortified.

Or something along those lines, I'm going from memory here.

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Sweetpea55 · 14/03/2019 10:20

My DD had a long conversation on the phone with DGS headteacher.. It must have been a nice conversation because she ended it : Bye love you '. Its the way we ways end our phone calls .

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GirlRaisedInTheSouth · 14/03/2019 10:22

Years ago when I worked in the music industry a very famous DJ was at a party with me and my boss. The DJ was a huge fan of Elton John (who was at the party) but had never personally met him. My boss knew EJ well so brought him over as a surprise to meet the DJ.

Said DJ was so shocked he shook EJ’s hand and for some inexplicable reason, when EJ said “Hello”, the DJ stuttered “p..p..poofter.”

It was the weirdest thing.

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JorahsMistress · 14/03/2019 11:59

Went to my dads house once for a family gathering on my birthday, my dad opened the door and straight away said happy birthday, so i said happy birthday back to him (not weird as it was his birthday too)

Only thing was as i went through the house to say hi to people they all naturally greeted me with happy birthday, and i said it back to ALL of them Confused

It was no-one else's birthday BlushBlush

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blamethecat · 14/03/2019 12:18

I was at work busy looking at tickets for the F1 race at Silverstone , and answered the phone 'Good morning Silverstone opticians' To my bosses husband.
I have also done the same as OP when on hold answered as if they phoned me at work, I wasn't even at work at the time.

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ChanandlerBongsLeftShoe · 14/03/2019 15:30

GottenGottenGotten

That's brilliant Grin

Does anyone else smile when they are day dreaming and then realise that you've been grinning like an idiot at nothing for some time?!

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GallicosCats · 14/03/2019 15:37

You know you've spent too much time at work when you press 9 for an outside line on your mobile. Grin

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EmeraldShamrock · 14/03/2019 15:44

I had a complete blank with DS preschool teachers name, I called her the wrong name, similar but wrong, think May I said June, I realised immediately but couldn't remember her name for a few minutes, she could see the panic on my face.
It was extra shitty because she is being a amazing support to DS Blush

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Wavingwhiledrowning · 14/03/2019 15:47

I once hugged my manager at the end of a meeting. I don't know why I did it. It was a really stressful day and the last meeting before home time. I think my thoughts were elsewhere... He just stood there like a statue whilst I lunged at him. It was all slightly more awkward because we were in a glass meeting room on an open plan floor plate though Blush. Even thinking about it as I type now is making me feel all flustered.

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EmeraldShamrock · 14/03/2019 15:52

Wavingwhiledrowning Hilarious Grin

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Pinkbells · 14/03/2019 15:59

I borrowed my husband's car once, parked it in the shopping centre, then got on the bus and came back home. When I walked up the road I noticed his car was gone. 'Oh, he must be out', I thought. When I found him indoors I was even more surprised then eventually the penny came slowly down on its little parachute and I had to get the bus back to go and collect the car (which by now had a parking ticket on it).

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LittleCandle · 14/03/2019 16:02

On Monday I nearly answered the phone with my area manager's store, not my own. I was certain it was her on the line, so I suppose that was why. It was her, btw.

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FullOfJellyBeans · 14/03/2019 16:09

I've definitely signed a formal email love xxxxx.

The worst was once when I'd just started a new job and was very nervous. I came in one day thinking I'd lost my phone. My colleague saw I looked flustered and asked what was wrong I said I'd lost my phone and I think it's been stolen as I keep calling it but it's unavailable. She looked confused and asked whose phone it was I had in my hand (that I had been using to call my phone). Ooops. I'm sure she thought I was a complete idiot from that day on.

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igotdemons · 14/03/2019 16:16

Whilst I’m sure I’ve had many a brain fart, I can’t remember any off the top of my head (!) but I will always remember one my DH had years ago at a friends’ engagement gathering as we still laugh about it now! 😂

We’d all met up in a small, local restaurant to celebrate and there were about 12 of us all on a long table. The evening had gone as expected, lots of gushing about the proposal, the ring and their future wedding plans etc. There could be no doubt that we were all gathered to celebrate an engagement.

At the end of the evening, we were the first to leave and as we and the engaged couple all stood up to say goodbye with the rest of the group watching, my DH very loudly said to the female friend of the couple “Anyway, Happy Birthday!” 😳😮

To this day my DH still doesn’t know what possessed him to say it 😂

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MissionItsPossible · 14/03/2019 16:19

I once worked in a call centre and answered the phone with "Hello, you're through to...." and then dead silence as I had completely forgotten my own name.

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FullOnMonet1975 · 14/03/2019 16:23

My MIL has a tendacy to say things then expect you to overly react. Half the time my brain zones out & shes just sat there staring at me waiting for a reaction but I have no clue what she's said. I just say "oh wow" to everything now & hope she's not just told me someones died Blush

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DianaPrincessOfThemyscira · 14/03/2019 16:23

@MissionItsPossible

I did something similar, said “I’ll spell my surname (as it’s unusual) that’s S I G no it isn’t, let me start again”. Hadn’t changed my name or anything just momentary brain fart!

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Fortheloveofscience · 14/03/2019 16:27

With me it’s the alpha Charlie Foxtrot thing for saying letters, can’t remember what it’s called.

My personal favourite was when on the phone I said “J for...erm...erm...Geoff” Blush. Client was Hmm.

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MooChops89 · 14/03/2019 16:29

When we came to view the house we now live in, as we were leaving my husband thought the landlady was going in for a hug so hugged her back, turned out she was just reaching for the door handle to let us out! He says it still makes him feel sick thinking about it Grin

I'm crying laughing just thinking about it now!

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Eliza9917 · 14/03/2019 16:33

I was taking sandwich orders before a meeting started. People normally had various combinations of sausage, egg & bacon. Someone asked me what vegetarian things they had so I reeled off, ham, cheese, egg, tuna etc.

I thought he's asked what cold sandwiches there were instead of fry up sandwiches.

Confused Blush

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StellaRae · 14/03/2019 16:59

MooChops89 I've got the giggles really badly after reading your post!

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ChanandlerBongsLeftShoe · 14/03/2019 17:23

MooChops89 🤣🤣🤣🤣

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