Advanced search

To think you can't swear at your boss

(52 Posts)
glasshalf Mon 11-Mar-19 18:19:10

Nc for this so it's not outing but I'm a regular on here .
As the title says Aibu to think it's not ok to shout and swear at your boss and it should be a disciplinary?? Never been in the situation before as never worked in an office environment which is why I'm asking .

DoneLikeAKipper Mon 11-Mar-19 18:21:49

Would you like to elaborate at all?

Samind Mon 11-Mar-19 18:23:29

I'd imagine it would be unless they were "besties" and rules are changed slightly.

Tomtontom Mon 11-Mar-19 18:23:32

Need more information.

For me, no it's not acceptable. But in some environments swearing is the norm and therefore might not be inappropriate, depending on what was said.

ZippyBungleandGeorge Mon 11-Mar-19 18:25:37

I'm friendly with my boss out of work, see him Saturday evening in fact. Definitely swear words exchanged and a lot of mutual piss taking. Depends on context

ZippyBungleandGeorge Mon 11-Mar-19 18:25:52


CarolineForbes Mon 11-Mar-19 18:26:05

I don’t mind swearing in conversation but if someone is shouting and swearing AT you or in an aggressive tone then yes disciplinary action. The context matters here.

glasshalf Mon 11-Mar-19 18:26:28

Not really I just want to know if it's something that's acceptable If an employee is stressed generally speaking or if it's not the norm. As i said I'm relatively new to the office environment .

Sparklesocks Mon 11-Mar-19 18:27:06

Generally it’s not appropriate no, did this happen in the office during working hours or at a social event?

glasshalf Mon 11-Mar-19 18:27:38

Apologies I meant aggressively swearing and calling the boss names not general swearing because I am a bit sweary myself but never ever directing at anyone just like "god that's ducking annoying" .

glasshalf Mon 11-Mar-19 18:29:13

Sorry I see what you mean by context , it's been a long day I'm not feeling very bright! Sorry all. I mean throwing your toys out temper swearing not just being a general potty mouth.

DoneLikeAKipper Mon 11-Mar-19 18:29:58

Without context it really is impossible to say. What happened, exactly? There’s a huge difference between (for example):

Small company, boss and employees are quite familiar, close environment, a bit of a heated debate/argument. They chat and have a laugh about it later.


Large company, general office guy goes apeshit at top manager for reasons that may or may not be unreasonable. Whole office hears, manager’s position is hugely undermined.

Nanny0gg Mon 11-Mar-19 18:30:19

Wouldn't recommend it.

VanillaLatteAndCake Mon 11-Mar-19 18:30:39

I wouldn't normally swear at a boss or use swear words in conversation with a manager however, my current boss is one-of-a-kind shall we say and swearing is common- both from him and in conversation with him.

MinisterforCheekyFuckery Mon 11-Mar-19 18:30:45

I don't think swearing at anyone in the work environment is acceptable, whether they're senior to you or not. I work in quite a sweary office but it's just swearing in conversation, never directed at someone in anger. If it was it would definitely be a disciplinary issue.

Namechangeforthiscancershit Mon 11-Mar-19 18:32:30

Swearing AT someone isn’t ok in an office regardless of who manages who.

Being a bit sweaty in conversation with your boss depends on the boss.

chesterfuckingdraws Mon 11-Mar-19 18:32:30

I wouldn't expect anyone I work with to aggressively shout and swear at me. I'd be logging a formal grievance and would want the matter taken seriously.

I work with offenders and I'm well used to verbally and physically aggressive behaviour from them which I don't tolerate. There is no way I'd tolerate it from a colleague at any level

MeredithGrey1 Mon 11-Mar-19 18:33:16

I think it depends on context, and if they were actually swearing at the boss. I.e. there’s a difference between a very stressed employee loudly saying in frustration to their boss “my fucking computer never works!” and an employee directing the swearing at the boss, like “well it would help if you weren’t such a bitch.” Neither are totally acceptable (depends on specific culture of that office) but I think the first is a lot more forgivable than a directed insult.

Neverender Mon 11-Mar-19 18:35:13

Someone in my team did similar in anger and is currently going through a disciplinary

leghairdontcare Mon 11-Mar-19 18:35:14

It's not acceptable but I think a disciplinary is overkill unless it happens regularly. I would expect the manager to tell the employee that it's not acceptable and not to do it again.

If you're a new manager in an office environment please don't start off on the route of discplinaries and the like without getting a feel for the culture. This is one of the most common mistakes new managers make in my opinion.

MilkTwoSugarsThanks Mon 11-Mar-19 18:35:31

Depends entirely on what triggered the outburst. I've known some real twats and yes I've sworn at them. Not proud of it, but never been disciplined for it.

TakenForSlanted Mon 11-Mar-19 18:36:53

If it's swearing at in the sense of verbally abusing: not at your boss, not at your subordinates or any other colleague, for that matter.

Having said that, the general use of profanity in a non-aggressive manner is best left to mutual consent between the participants in question. I've had the same boss for goibg on half a decade at this point. We've risen up through the ranks in tandem - him always slightly ahead of me. We're mates and I'll absolutely go "oh, for fuck's sake, James (not his actual name)!" at him when he's having a moment and vice versa. We're both fine with that as well as with penis jokes and we both thoroughly enjoy a good old double entendre.

None of us would go there with a subordinate.

He would with his own boss. I'd do the swearing and general taking the piss bit with his boss but not the innuendo, for the simple reason that "James" and I definitely don't fancy each other at all, so it's safe, but I'm not the same degree of certain about James' boss not interpreting it as me flirting with him.

glasshalf Mon 11-Mar-19 18:37:06

@leghairdontcare I'm not a new manager I'm just an employee too but would never ever lose my shit with a colleague let alone my boss .

Happynow001 Mon 11-Mar-19 18:38:35

I don't know your own job situation- in mine it would be totally unacceptable and might Land me with a disciplinary.

Mari50 Mon 11-Mar-19 18:38:40

I swear a lot at work, it’s not an especially sweary place but I am exceptionally sweary. I wouldn’t swear st my boss in a confrontational/aggressive/argumentative way but I swear a lot in his company. And occasionally he swears in mine- which is when I know he’s really pissed off.
Generally, no, you don’t swear at your boss.

Join the discussion

Registering is free, quick, and means you can join in the discussion, watch threads, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Get started »