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Blocking abusive ex.

(11 Posts)
Blockingexfrommylife Mon 11-Mar-19 13:42:50

I've had am awful weekend full of vile messages from my exdp that has left me feeling like utter crap.
I need to block him, however we have two dcs which he doesn't really see regularly but I still need a way for him to contact them and vice versa.

They don't have their own phones as they are too young, but do have tablets are there any apps that they can use easily to contact him without a phone number?

user1493413286 Mon 11-Mar-19 13:46:25

Is there someone else who can be the middle person for communication, like his mum or your mum? You could say to him that you’re not going to communicate with him but to contact your mum if he wants to see the children.
The other option is to set up an email address that is only for communication with him, give that to him and block any other forms of communication. You can then decide how often you’ll check that and it gives you the power over when you look at it so even if he sends abusive messages you don’t have them coming through on your phone constantly

Bigonesmallone3 Mon 11-Mar-19 13:46:48

Why are u still being so reasonable.. if he can't be a half decent human to u why are u still allowing him to speak to the children!

I know I wouldn't until he gave up and started acting decently!

10IAR Mon 11-Mar-19 13:47:57

You only need to have contact if he remains civil. If he doesn't,that's his lookout.

XH tried to use contact and pick up and drop offs to continue abuse. He learned fast that shit wasn't going to fly.

Blockingexfrommylife Mon 11-Mar-19 13:55:36

@Bigonesmallone3 My dc still thinks the sun shines out if his backside, despite him only seeing them twice this year angry
I cannot legally stop contact with them, if I could have I would've done it years ago.

@10IAR I stopped him coming to my house over a year ago because of his threats and abuse, it seems to have made him worse, now I'm getting messages telling me I've stopped him seeing the dcs because I won't let him come to my house.

This weekend alone he has accused me of abusing ds, stopping contact and has told me he cannot have the dcs at his home because I don't like his partner confused and it's unfair on her.

jessfarringdon Mon 11-Mar-19 13:58:01

I was going to try and input some thoughts and ideas, but I simply can't think of anything. It sounds terrible, I'm so sorry to hear he is being so bad. sad

Blockingexfrommylife Mon 11-Mar-19 14:00:02

It is terrible and I really cannot understand why he is like this.

Atleastihavethecat Mon 11-Mar-19 14:03:57

Depending on the age of your DC, it might not be a good idea to allow them direct contact with him. You'll have no idea what he's telling them. However, in answer to your question, there's an app called stars messaging. Don't need an email, or phone number and to add a contact you need the person's username, and a pin number to confirm that the contacts actually know each other, so the DC can't go around adding random people. But are you sure direct contact is the way you want to go?

Waveysnail Mon 11-Mar-19 14:04:42

If he knows where u live I'd give him landline number only and change mobile numbers. Set up call screening and put an answer phone in it. Then if you don't want to answer he can leave a message and kids can call him back.

10IAR Mon 11-Mar-19 14:06:21

Blockingexfrommylife that all sounds depressingly familiar. He's a cunt, just like my XH.

Unfortunately contact centre and supervised visits until he could keep a civil tongue in his head were the only way I could see forward.

You don't have to accept his abuse, you really, really don't.

Blockingexfrommylife Mon 11-Mar-19 14:10:28

@Atleastihavethecat I am very concerned about what he says to them when I'm not around, as I've heard him badmouth me to them before in person.
Especially as he is accusing me of emotionally abusing them, it's all just making my head spin I don't know what to do for the best anymore.

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