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To think OH should take the day of?

(68 Posts)
caute Mon 11-Mar-19 05:53:11

I'm very ill drowsy and tired and a really bad migraine every time I bend down my head goes so dizzy I feel like I'm going to collapse. I don't feel safe driving like this. Ds needs to go to nursery and I need to go to the doctors and the hospital for a blood test. I've been ill for a while now but It's getting much worse.

He said he will drop me at my mums but that is no help because my mum can't drive.

CanuckBC Mon 11-Mar-19 06:11:02

Yes, if he can he should take a day off to help you. That is what partners are for.

Scarydinosaurs Mon 11-Mar-19 06:12:35

He needs to sort DS. Can you get a taxi? It would be cheaper than losing a day’s pay.

caute Mon 11-Mar-19 06:18:47

I I could but I have DS as well I just don't feel good to be our with her on my own.

TheNavigator Mon 11-Mar-19 06:26:28

Can't he drop DS at nursery and then go to work? I don't think he needs to take a whole day off to look after you.

CanuckBC Mon 11-Mar-19 06:29:08

Do you mean you have a DD as well? How old is she?

CarpetGate Mon 11-Mar-19 06:30:26

He should sort nursery and you should sort yourself with taxi, etc. No need for him to take day off.

Namechangeforthiscancershit Mon 11-Mar-19 06:30:33

Do you really need it to be hospital for a blood test? That will be way more stressful for you than necessary. I’m not sure why your GP can’t sort it all if you do need to be seen.

Your DP should sort out getting your DS to and from nursery though for sure

Tawdrylocalbrouhaha Mon 11-Mar-19 06:49:26

When you say you've been ill for a while, have you seen your GP already about this? Have they found any cause for concern?

If you are generally well and now I'll, or if you have a chronic health condition, then your DH should at least take your DS to nursery, and if possible ask for him to do a long day. However if this is a bit of an ongoing situation he can't be taking time off for a migraine.

BlimeyCalmDown Mon 11-Mar-19 06:53:33

I'd say get him to drop baby off at nursery or your mum's. No need for him to take a day off.

caroline161 Mon 11-Mar-19 06:54:50

Np way would my Dh take a day off for my illness ever. He might run children places and then run me to the hospital in his lunchtime but he would still do a full days work

FuckyNel Mon 11-Mar-19 06:56:42

No! He should save it for a real emergency like projectile vomiting or death (his not yours)

icelollycraving Mon 11-Mar-19 06:59:11

I don’t think he needs to take a day off. As long as he can do the nursery run,

BertrandRussell Mon 11-Mar-19 06:59:31

“Np way would my Dh take a day off for my illness ever.“

And you’re still with him because?

OP, unless you are a serial hypochondriac or you are incredibly poor and he would lose a day’s pay or his work is so incredibly vital that others will suffer badly if he’s not there, of course he should take a day off if rhere’s no one else you can call on.

HK20 Mon 11-Mar-19 07:01:48

He should take DS to nursery but don't see why he needs to take the day off

Bookworm4 Mon 11-Mar-19 07:04:16

I often wonder how all the married mums think how single parents cope? A day off work when you have other options is a bit much, he can drop DS off and you get a taxi to GP, simple.

EmperorBallpitine Mon 11-Mar-19 07:05:22

Your hospital appointments and diagnoses are important. Your childcare arrangements are important. His work is important. None of these things are more important than others. At the very least he needs to organize to take your children to your mums house so you can go to hospital in a taxi because he is the one who does not feel shite.
My husband has a very responsible job which would not enable him to take random days off but he has occasionally for days like this!

BertrandRussell Mon 11-Mar-19 07:06:39

“I often wonder how all the married mums think how single parents cope?”
They cope. And sometimes it’s shit. The OP is incredibly lucky not to be in that position.

adaline Mon 11-Mar-19 07:09:52

* I often wonder how all the married mums think how single parents cope?*

What does that have to do with anything? OP isn't a single parent, she has a partner who should step up and help her out when she's not well - isn't that kind of the point of being in a partnership?

Bookworm4 Mon 11-Mar-19 07:12:56

My point is the immediate reaction is I can't cope, yes partners support one another but there's plenty you can do for yourself; I don't think the first response should be 'help me' think how you can manage without someone taking a day off or running you somewhere, life doesn't end because you can't drive.

blueskiesovertheforest Mon 11-Mar-19 07:17:46

Bookworm4 how single mums cope is irrelevant to the OP. How people without their mum nearby cope is irrelevant to the OP. How people who don't have their child in nursery cope is irrelevant to the OP. How people in Mexican slums cope is, today, irrelevant to the OP.

The OP has a partner, a baby and a nursery aged child and needs to go to hospital and doesn't feel safe to drive. He's a crappy partner if he could take the day off if she needs him to, yet when she asks him to he says a flat no. Assuming that this is a one off and not happening regularly, in which case of course another solution needs putting in place.

CarlGrimesMissingEye Mon 11-Mar-19 07:18:04

In similar circumstances my DH would do the nursery drop off / kid sorting then would stay in touch throughout the day in case I needed him to do pick up too. Xx

Decormad38 Mon 11-Mar-19 07:18:19

I don’t think he should take a day of because you have a migraine! My dh has had a migraine every day since a year last November. We would have lost our jobs with that approach! Just get him to drop dd off at nursery. There are things called taxis!

ScreamingValenta Mon 11-Mar-19 07:22:39

It depends how easy it would be for him to do this, whether it would negatively affect his work.

caute Mon 11-Mar-19 07:23:19

I have a hypothyroidism and I have a genetic blood disease so Im often in excruciating pain as my blood cells can block my blood flow. and I have been a single mum before and I had more help then than I do now.

He has taken the day of anyway.

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