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To think ALL women should read this! (Shark Cage)

(22 Posts)
Newyeardontcare Sun 10-Mar-19 18:03:35

Never knew about this until yesterday (thank you mumsnet) I think ALL women (girls and parents) should read this...

In fact, all people!

shark cage

Noeuf Sun 10-Mar-19 18:32:34

OMG 8 pages of tiny print. What is it about?

Guineapiglet345 Sun 10-Mar-19 18:41:57

Very interesting, I can definitely recognise myself as a ‘Sally’ and I’ve known ‘Chantelle’s, it’s so important to make sure our children have a strong sense of self worth.

elQuintoConyo Sun 10-Mar-19 18:45:54

PDF won't open on my phone. Do you have a link? What is it?

TheNavigator Sun 10-Mar-19 18:49:42

It is about understanding the psychology of abused women. Long and tiny print so I didn't bother reading it. May be useful for victims of abuse, I don't know.

Noeuf Sun 10-Mar-19 18:54:16

Just googled it. A metaphor for protection against predators.
As a survivor of an abusive marriage I'd like to see more for the bloody men and less for the women. Sorry that's probably unpopular on here but as I get older I'd just like other people to behave better and not expect me to get better at spotting them or protecting myself.

FriarTuck Sun 10-Mar-19 18:59:52

I was expecting details of a good shark movie. I'm disappointed.

MitziK Sun 10-Mar-19 19:01:41

Lots of warble in it.

Basically, it explains that some people have learned to protect themselves against predators/abusers to the extent that they don't manage to insinuate themselves into their lives, because every attempt to breach a boundary is noted and resisted.

Others haven't been given those tools, so are more vulnerable.

The key to not getting into successively abusive relationships is to learn to recognise those boundaries and repel the predators before they are harmed mentally or physically. To recognise that they don't have to accept attention when they feel uneasy, that they have the right to make their own decisions, etc, etc.

The Big Bang Theory explained it as not having an effective deflector shield, like on the Starship Enterprise. It's the same principle.

Hope that saves a few people the effort of sorting through the chaff.

MitziK Sun 10-Mar-19 19:08:49

@Noeuf, perhaps if you wished to use the same metaphor, you could perhaps, rather than see sharks, visualise the abusive woman as and incredibly beautiful fish. They look harmless, so they get in and then turn out to be venomous.

The fact is that there will always be predators. Fact of life on earth.

Same as there will always be bacteria, fungi and viruses. Many are completely harmless, some are beneficial - and some are deadly. This shark cage idea is having a healthy immune system to repel infection - eating right, hygiene, avoiding obvious contamination, still being careful when it isn't obvious, getting vaccinated, treating cuts and wounds immediately, recognising when there is a serious disease and avoiding completely or going immediately to the GP when you've been in contact with it.

thedisorganisedmum Sun 10-Mar-19 19:08:58

I thought it was about swimming with sharks when you have your periods.

I am seriously disappointed too.

Newyeardontcare Sun 10-Mar-19 19:16:42

It's pdf, so you can zoom in...

Newyeardontcare Sun 10-Mar-19 19:17:09

@thedisorganisedmum lol and wtf!! 🤣

youaremyrain Sun 10-Mar-19 19:27:32

Its very interesting. I like the detail and the metaphor is very helpful

joggerbottom Sun 10-Mar-19 19:34:05

Noeuf-

I get what you are saying. The real problem here is how some people can't see their predatory nature or care about the emotional toll on others when they cross boundaries.

elQuintoConyo Sun 10-Mar-19 19:36:50

What about Sharknado where they come at you from all angles?

MitziK Sun 10-Mar-19 20:06:22

Sharknado? That sounds like a normal weekend in the town centre.

youaremyrain Sun 10-Mar-19 20:32:20

@Noeuf morally and ideally, yes, it's the men that need to change. Realistically though?
The author of the article points out that the shark cage model was developed in response to women asking why they keep being targeted so it works in that respect

Grumpelstilskin Sun 10-Mar-19 20:40:13

*thedisorganisedmum Are we possibly related...?

I thought exactly the same regarding not swimming when you got your period. I also read a crime story how someone murdered their partner by placing a hidden blood soaked tampon in their surfing outfit... grin

thedisorganisedmum Sun 10-Mar-19 21:01:50

Grumpelstilskin
gringringrin

but that's it, I am never going swimming again

Noeuf Sun 10-Mar-19 21:18:22

@MitziK literally no clue what you're on about.
And no, I don't want to use any metaphor I'd just like people to stop being arseholes.

MitziK Sun 10-Mar-19 22:19:13

Well, @Noeuf, that's never going to fucking happen.

The only thing people can do is learn tools to be able to avoid/escape the worst ones.

PissOffPeppa Sun 10-Mar-19 22:30:14

I thought it was about swimming with sharks when you have your periods

Me too!

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