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To think I'm not a "young Mum"?

(210 Posts)
AlwaysFuckingTired94 Sun 10-Mar-19 17:39:05

Pregnant with DC1 at 22, had her at 23

Pregnant with DC2 at 23 and had her at 24.

Aibu to think this isn't young to have kids? It's definitely the average age to start a family where I grew up.

Keep getting referred to as a "young Mum" out and about, at toddler groups etc and it feels a tad patronising.

Sparklesocks Sun 10-Mar-19 17:41:14

It’s all relative I suppose, people who have their kids in their 30s may see you as a young mum.

TheSchumanPlan Sun 10-Mar-19 17:42:01

Where I live, in my social circle, hardly anyone has kids before they’re 28 at the earliest - and most are over 30.

Most people I know were finishing university and starting their careers at the age of 22, and were not in a position to start a family.

So yes, I would consider you a young mum.

PristineCondition Sun 10-Mar-19 17:42:03

Take no notice. I had one at 16 and was called a young mum and one at 25 and called an older mum by some

I’m 33 now and would probably be called a geriatric mother if I have another😂

FudgeBrownie2019 Sun 10-Mar-19 17:44:32

I'm 37 and had my first at 24. At the time I didn't feel young, looking back I absolutely was.

My sister had her first at 16 and comparatively I wasn't young. But 24 is still young and although I wouldn't change a thing, coming straight from University into Motherhood was hard.

Nix32 Sun 10-Mar-19 17:44:40

Young for my circle of friends - we were all around 30 when we had our first.

Not young for my parents at school (I'm a teacher) - plenty of mums in their early 20s.

kaytee87 Sun 10-Mar-19 17:45:01

Yes, I'd consider you a young mum. You'd certainly be very young where I live. I had ds a couple of days before I turned 29 and I was on the younger side here.

I wouldn't actually refer to you as a young mum though. There wouldn't be any need to mention it.

weltenbummler Sun 10-Mar-19 17:45:10

biologically it is the ideal age to have kids. people who are characterising you as a "young mum" are doing so against their own social norms; for example average age of first time mothers in UK is now 30

EntirelyAnonymised Sun 10-Mar-19 17:45:13

You are young. According to the latest published statistics from ONS, the average age of a first time mother in the UK is 28.8 years old.

www.ons.gov.uk/peoplepopulationandcommunity/birthsdeathsandmarriages/livebirths/bulletins/birthsbyparentscharacteristicsinenglandandwales/2016

Obviously the local average ages will vary from area to area but nationally speaking, you are young.

thefirst48 Sun 10-Mar-19 17:45:41

Yeah I'd consider you a young mum too.

PatriciaHolm Sun 10-Mar-19 17:45:48

The average age of a first time mother in the U.K. is 29, so yes I say you are young.

We all have different outlooks on this determined in many cases by our social circles. I only know a handful of mums who had their first children in their early 20s; most of my friends were early 30s!

EntirelyAnonymised Sun 10-Mar-19 17:46:11

Apologies, those stats are only for England & Wales.

ApplestheHare Sun 10-Mar-19 17:46:59

You are a young mum thoughsmile

As pp said the average age for the UK is much higher.

outpinked Sun 10-Mar-19 17:47:10

Technically young because more and more women are waiting until their thirties or even forties nowadays.

A few decades ago you’d probably already have a full brood at your age and have started at 18/19 once you were married.

MyDcAreMarvel Sun 10-Mar-19 17:47:38

Well you might think it but factually you are.

MyDcAreMarvel Sun 10-Mar-19 17:47:47

*not think

ThroughThickAndThin01 Sun 10-Mar-19 17:47:54

Sounds young to me. Nothing wrong with it though.

SummerHouse Sun 10-Mar-19 17:49:01

I was 33 and 36 when I had mine and would find it annoying to be called an old mum.

SwimmingJustKeepSwimming Sun 10-Mar-19 17:49:54

I'd say young mum but I've moved to an area with a lot of younger mums so its the "norm" in our school.

I mean it IS young isnt it?

Fuckedoffmax Sun 10-Mar-19 17:50:39

I was 22 when I had my first, had 3 by 23. Thought nothing of it. By the time I had my 5th at 30 at felt ancient!
At the end of the day its personal choice and no one else's business

BirdieInTheHand Sun 10-Mar-19 17:51:56

It's all relative isn't it? I have a professional career and had three DC in mid 20s. We live in a very MC part of London and all the DC are at fee paying schools. We're seen as practically baby's by some of the other school parents grin.

I'm sure there's plenty of places where I'd be considered old, if not ancient!

DramaAlpaca Sun 10-Mar-19 17:53:01

You are a young mum, but there's nothing wrong with that.

monkeysox Sun 10-Mar-19 17:53:01

Most people who go to uni start work and buy a home before marriage and kids.
Due to how much things cost many wait until they have more security.

OddBoots Sun 10-Mar-19 17:53:33

Society has become so much more used to older mothers now that women becoming mothers at the age they used to in previous generations are seen as young. We have an odd miss-match between the ideal biological age and the ideal social age to have children. I'm glad we have a choice of some sorts these days but it does seem to have pushed it so those not waiting until they are older are seen as the odd ones.

3boysandabump Sun 10-Mar-19 17:54:30

I had my first at 22 & second at 23. I didn't consider myself to be a young mum at the time but having had subsequent dc at 27 & 30 I realise I was. It doesn't really matter though does it?

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