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To press charges against this parent?

(644 Posts)
Rosegarden10 Sun 10-Mar-19 08:39:11

I've name changed for this as obviously this is very outing.

On Friday, my child attended a school disco. Whilst they were at the school disco, another parent broke into the school and was banging on the hall doors to get in. When she couldnt access the hall she kicked the glass door and broke the window smashing the glass. The children and adults inside were terrified and they had to evacuate the children in an emergency lockdown procedure.

My child (and the majority of the other children) are now traumatised. My child doesnt want to go back to school tomorrow. The police arrived at the scene however it doesnt appear as though they arrested her as she the parent was on the parent WhatsApp group trying to justify her behaviour an hour after the incident.

Can I press charges against this woman for the trauma she has caused my child and the other children? I am so angry!!

JacquesHammer Sun 10-Mar-19 09:14:10

Rose try reading the responses yeah? It makes life much easier

ChristinaMarlowe Sun 10-Mar-19 09:14:10

I should have said stable finances not 'normal 🙈 Now I'm sounding crazy too. Quick, find me a window...

CountessVonBoobs Sun 10-Mar-19 09:14:13

Those scoffing at the idea of it being a terrorist Attack should think about Dunblabe or schools in America. I’m sure the parents and relatives of those lost in those atrocities would agree with you.

It's not an insult to the relatives of those lost in those situations to state the facts: Dunblane and the school shootings that are sadly far too common in the US are not and were not terrorist incidents.

Dunblane was a terrible, terrible thing, but it was not a terrorist incident. It was a single mass killer. It was also 23 years ago and drove changes in handgun laws and school procedures which have meant it has not recurred as a scenario since.

It was a scary situation no doubt. But the school did their jobs, no one was hurt, a single aggressive parent committing some property damage is not remotely a "terrorist incident", and your job now is to help your child see it as the fairly minor incident it was, not compound the issue.

BabyKeith Sun 10-Mar-19 09:15:27

* criminal damage, not communal hmm

Perty01234 Sun 10-Mar-19 09:16:19

They might be interviewing her at a later date OP, on a voluntary basis. The outcome is still the same.
Being arrested isn’t a punishment, the punishment is whatever the outcome is

CaptainBrickbeard Sun 10-Mar-19 09:17:11

Why are school shootings not considered terrorist offences? I would say that’s exactly what they are.

GottenGottenGotten Sun 10-Mar-19 09:18:16

Lots of drip feeding going on here.

She kicked doors and broke glass to get in

She was mad at the head

She might have been armed

The kids thought it was a terrorist attack

Oh, yeah, she said she was going to kill the head

Can't wait to see what comes next!

LakieLady Sun 10-Mar-19 09:18:47

I'm a bit shock that a primary age child should suspect a terrorist attack when an angry shouty woman bashes on a glass door and breaks it.

What have these children been allowed to watch on tv?

Fortybingowings Sun 10-Mar-19 09:19:26

What happened was awful, you are right.
BUT continuing the drama by replaying it is not helpful for your kids. A simple explanation about bad people and then move on. Kids are resilient. Focusing excessively on 'trauma' will do them no favours.
Be angry yes, but park it and then move on

whippersnapperwrapper Sun 10-Mar-19 09:19:41

Did none of the kids recognise her as X's mum ?

Ellapaella Sun 10-Mar-19 09:20:16

I sympathise OP, I'd be really upset if my child had been upset by this. Like you say you can only go on what your child said which is that they found it very frightening and upsetting. Presumably all these posters who are thinking you're being dramatic would have just told their kids to get over it and not be so silly? most children don't witness violent aggressive behaviour on a regular basis and so would find it very distressing and frightening to see an adult behaving in this way.
Unfortunately there probably isn't very much you personally can do about it though OP - except hope that this parent has been spoken to by the police and for the teachers sake has been very strongly advised not to behave in this way again.

harriethoyle Sun 10-Mar-19 09:20:28

Your child obviously inherited their drama llama streak from you hmm

Drogosnextwife Sun 10-Mar-19 09:20:29

Why was the parent let into the reception? At my dcs school the reception door is the door that is locked and there are no locks on the doors inside, so how did she get in?

hiddengem86 Sun 10-Mar-19 09:21:26

This is awful, as a mother of young children. I know my children would be terrified of going back to school and lose confidence that school is a safe place if this was to happen. The police will not do anything for traumatising your child. But surely. He can be charged for criminal damage, if you bang on glass you know it may smash. I know I would be angry and want answers as to what is happening with her going forward. Maybe as parents who are concerned you should seek answers from the school of what is going to be put in place with this parent to avoid this happening again.

StillCoughingandLaughing Sun 10-Mar-19 09:21:48

The CHILDREN especially the older ones were coming out crying saying they thought it was a terror attack. Kids watch the fucking news!!!!!

And adults watch American TV and get inaccurate ideas into their heads about being able to ‘press charges’ just because they’re unhappy about something.

Rosegarden10 Sun 10-Mar-19 09:21:56

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

CountessVonBoobs Sun 10-Mar-19 09:22:00

@CountessVonBoobs Are we assuming she "doubtless has fuck as all money" because all crazy/drunk people are on benefits?! Or is it simply that anyone with normal finances is too naice to act like a violent loony?

Happy to. It's got nothing to do with benefits and everything to do with the economics of suing a private individual on fairly shaky grounds. There's a reason civil suits are generally against institutions and corporations. The OP would have to pay out up front because no solicitor would be able to count on a settlement and therefore wouldn't do it no win no fee. So tens of thousands, maybe more, up front. The woman won't have insurance of any kind. Unless she is a cash millionaire with significant liquid and liquifiable assets, which seems fairly unlikely, there's just nothing for a civil suit to take, and certainly nothing to make it worth OPs money filing one. She could be very naice and comfortable indeed and still have fuck-all money from a legal POV.

whippersnapperwrapper Sun 10-Mar-19 09:22:13

You reassure your child that it was an angry parent, nothing to do with them ..and you move on. Prolonging the drama and the what ifs just makes it worse.

Hoppinggreen Sun 10-Mar-19 09:22:49

If none of the children or staff could see what was going on I imagine their first thought would be teenagers dicking around rather than terrorists ( unless OP lives somewhere where terrorist attacks are prevalent)
It must have been scary and awful to arrive to collect your child to find them distressed but I’m sure the police and School will be dealing with this and are under no obligation to tell parents the details of that
I would think a “yes, it must have been very scary but it was just X’s mummy who was being very silly and might not have meant to break the glass at all. You know terrorist attacks are VERY VERY unusual and not something you need to worry about. Anyway, who’s for ice cream?”
Rather than “can I sue/press charges” might be a better response

JacquesHammer Sun 10-Mar-19 09:23:11

Rosegarden10

You’re refusing to answer questions, how would pressing charges aid your children’s “trauma”

IceRebel Sun 10-Mar-19 09:23:24

Post references a deleted post. Talk Guidelines.

LovingLola Sun 10-Mar-19 09:23:30

🙄

oldsewandsew Sun 10-Mar-19 09:23:32

If someone turned up at my work doing this, having no idea who that person was or if they were armed, I would be terrified! I can’t imagine how scary that was for all of the children OP. How would anyone know not to suspect a terrorist incident or if this person was armed at least? Thank goodness all the children were safe, but I’m not sure why people are minimising how scary this was for them and the staff.

CarrieBlu Sun 10-Mar-19 09:23:32

Well, you sound like an absolute delight OP.

smallereveryday Sun 10-Mar-19 09:23:49

FFS I think you have been absorbing too much American culture.

Not EVERYTHING that happens has a legal remedy. Not every unfortunate or unpleasant occurrence in life is a 'trauma'.

As they go through life - sadly your children are going to have unpleasant and upsetting situations. The very BEST thing you can do is teach resilience. Otherwise known as a 'stiff upper lip'. It's a proud British trait and much more effective and useful in the long term than 'pressing charges' (which doesn't exist anyway) .

Teaching children to 'keep calm and carry on' rather than 'fall apart reacting to my drama' is a far better parenting technique. I am concerned about the 'not wanting to go back to school ' issue. DO NOT FEED this.. In you shoes my kids wouldn't dream of this because they know I wouldn't give it house room. They take their lead from you. !

hardyloveit Sun 10-Mar-19 09:23:56

Op how did she try and justified it op?

I honestly can't believe some of these responses. Would you honestly tell your child to just get over it???

90percentvodka10percenthuman Sun 10-Mar-19 09:24:06

I do love an aibu/yes/fuck you thread

Rosegarden10 Sun 10-Mar-19 09:24:37

It wouldn't aid my child trauma - when have I fucking said that! It would reassure me that this woman is locked up and pays for what she did that night!

hiddengem86 Sun 10-Mar-19 09:25:15

I don't get why people are making such a commotion over the doors, in my childrens primary school the door opens to the reception area where staff would have to buzz you through to gain access to the school. Also these are primary school children why wouldn't they be traumatised.

IceRebel Sun 10-Mar-19 09:25:31

I honestly can't believe some of these responses. Would you honestly tell your child to just get over it???

No, but equally there's no need to talk about the mother being armed or a terrorist. It was scary, but the staff handled it well and no one was harmed.

whippersnapperwrapper Sun 10-Mar-19 09:25:31

Is she still on the WhatsApp group ?

TheFaerieQueene Sun 10-Mar-19 09:26:00

Well as you are not the CPS and can’t ‘press charges’ what are you hoping to achieve?

LakieLady Sun 10-Mar-19 09:26:22

Why are school shootings not considered terrorist offences? I would say that’s exactly what they are.

Doesn't an act have to include a political element to be considered terrorism in the UK, eg to influence the government or promote a particular cause?

So, a right-wing extremist murdering an MP: terrorism; Dunblane shooting: not terrorism.

Frecklesonmyarm Sun 10-Mar-19 09:26:37

So no answer to the fact that you actually dont know any of this is fact

Or how she broke reinforced glass

Or any facts, its come from some kids. Kids who are prone to exaggeration and some, if not many will be enjoying 'oh my God we nearly died'. That's what's happens with kids.

I remember my daughter telling me that there had been someone on school grounds with knife. There wasnt. They tried an ad hoc drill to evacuate, to practice. One kids said they overheard a teacher saying it wasnt a drill. It was bollocks and a planned drill because parents had been made aware in advance.

Clearly non of the adults picking up the kids went through reception as there was broken glass so no one can verify it.

Not one person has said it's ok. Simply that you need to deescalate the situation. You need to calm you child and help them understand while it was scary, they were not in danger.

This is YOUR job. Is it fair that parents have to deal with the fall out from others action, no. But it's still our job

exLtEveDallas Sun 10-Mar-19 09:26:49

I very much doubt the children thought they were being subjected to a terrorist attack

All it takes is one Year 6 drama queen to say it for the others to become hysterical. Last week we had about 20 kids from Year 3-6 absolutely hysterical, crying and creating over a 'man in a silver van climbing over the fences and snatching kids' - all absolute bollocks of course. We had to ask our PSCO to tell them it was bollocks before they'd calm down, and even then the one that started it was still being a dramalama at home time.

OP whilst you and your child have had a nasty shock, you need to downplay it (even if you don't want to). Praise the school for keeping them safe, call the crazy woman "silly", comment on how safe they were behind the locked door. I'm sure the school will be doing the same and you could even have a quiet word with a teacher saying how scared DC were and could they reassure them.

x2boys Sun 10-Mar-19 09:27:04

I don't think anyone is suggesting what this women did was ok, and I assume the police will be dealing with it how do you know they haven't charged her? The point is you can't press charges (assuming you are in the uk):and while I expected did upset 're kids ,kids are reslliant, my son has a a horribly traumatic experience when he was 8 and was questioned by the police and whilst it was obviously very upsetting for him he did learn to move on from it .

PettyContractor Sun 10-Mar-19 09:27:21

There’s no such crime as ‘traumatising a child’.

I'd guess the fear she caused was a crime. Threatening behaviour, disorderly conduct, something like that.

TheInvestigator Sun 10-Mar-19 09:27:27

@Rosegarden10

If you are in the UK then you cannot "press charges". That isn't a thing here.

You can report an incident to the police. They will investigate it. They will then send a report to the procurator fiscal (scotland) or crown prosecution service (England and wales). The fiscal or the crown service then review the report and decide if a conviction is likely, and if it is in the public interest to prosecute. If yes to both, they will issue charges and the prosecution process starts.

The police can also choose restorative justice, caution etc.

But it's not up to you. Your choices stop after you have reported an incident. It you change your mind, you can tell the police you don't want anything to happen but they can continue to investigate and bring charged it is necessary. So it's not up to you.

The police have been called. The woman may have been bailed or they might not have made any arrests whilst they investigate. But the process will be followed, however there is nothing for you to report as no crime was committed against you or your child. It was just against school property.

You could take civil action against her for the "trauma" but honestly, you should just use this as an educational tool with your child.

Someone tried to do something bad, the school followed their safety procedure and they children were all kept sage. That's what you should be focussing on and reinforcing with your child - that sometimes people his bad or stupid things, but that the teachers will always do everything they can to keep you safe and it worked this time.

Most importantly, you need to calm down. Your outbursts and bad reaction will fuel your child's; they look to you to see how they should react and you should be teaching calm and control, not mad.

FamilyOfAliens Sun 10-Mar-19 09:27:36

To the rest of your, go fuck yourself.

Thank goodness your child has someone calm and balanced to help her deal with this upset. She must feel very reassured.

Rosegarden10 Sun 10-Mar-19 09:28:07

NO PARENT HAS SUGGESTED IT WAS A TERRORIST. THE OLDER CHILDREN WERE COMING OUT SAYING THEY THOUGHT IT WAS A TERRORIST ATTACK. THE YOUNGER ONES HEARD. CAN 👏 YOU 👏 READ 👏

YogaWannabe Sun 10-Mar-19 09:29:01

I hate how litigious the world has gone. Ffs

LikeDolphinsCanSwim Sun 10-Mar-19 09:29:02

If you are in the UK you cannot “press charges”. Such a thing does not exist here.

As several people have already pointed out...

JacquesHammer Sun 10-Mar-19 09:29:16

Rosegarden10

I think you should calm down, one begins to suspect having an over-dramatic mother might be adding to your children’s alleged “trauma”.

Frecklesonmyarm Sun 10-Mar-19 09:29:35

when have I fucking said that! It would reassure me that this woman is locked up and pays for what she did that night!

So its revenge you want?

ZippyBungleandGeorge Sun 10-Mar-19 09:30:10

The CPS make decisions about prosecution on advice and information from the police. Stop informing your views on the justice system from watching TV. Pushing charges has absolutely nothing to do with you even if you were the direct victim of a crime

whippersnapperwrapper Sun 10-Mar-19 09:30:09

For the 3rd time - is she still on the WhatsApp group ?

marvellousnightforamooncup Sun 10-Mar-19 09:30:12

School doors are fire doors that can't be opened from the outside. Haven't you ever been to a school before?

SavoyCabbage Sun 10-Mar-19 09:30:17

They need to employ a better DJ. A decent sound system and 120 children should have drowned out the noise of a woman banging on some doors and kicking some glass.

Really though, when I’ve witnessed or been involved with similar situations, I’ve just been grateful that it’s not my life. Some people, including children are dealing with this sort of thing all of the time.

YogaWannabe Sun 10-Mar-19 09:30:29

one begins to suspect having an over-dramatic mother might be adding to your children’s alleged “trauma

Agree! The caps lock is on but there’s nobody home!

adulthumanwolf Sun 10-Mar-19 09:30:30

What would they lock her up for?

The most she'd get is probably a stern talking to by the police, which likely happened.

Namechangeforthiscancershit Sun 10-Mar-19 09:31:00

Ok OP you really do need to calm down. It’s not helping your child one bit. This has obviously upset you all but it’s time to turn it around and losing it at strangers online is not helping. Your child is safe and loved and has you to reassure them that school is totally safe.

CountessVonBoobs Sun 10-Mar-19 09:31:10

Oh, and if this woman IS, by any chance, a cash millionaire she will undoubtedly hire her own shit-hot lawyer, who will have no trouble getting the case thrown out. ("Your honour, why are we even discussing this? Trauma caused by watching property damage that the school didn't even bother to have her arrested over? My client broke the window accidentally, and has made full restitution to the school.")

Frecklesonmyarm Sun 10-Mar-19 09:31:14

NO PARENT HAS SUGGESTED IT WAS A TERRORIST. THE OLDER CHILDREN WERE COMING OUT SAYING THEY THOUGHT IT WAS A TERRORIST ATTACK

Then that's easier to solve. That sometimes kids, when emotional sometimes exaggerate. They were wrong. It was an angry parent.

Do you want the older kids to pay for making this worse?

Blindandfrozen Sun 10-Mar-19 09:31:17

Yeah, she won’t get a custodial sentence over a bit of criminal damage and public order. And that’s assuming the children’s accounts are wholly true

Rosegarden10 Sun 10-Mar-19 09:31:21

No she has been banned from the WhatsApp group.

Purplecatshopaholic Sun 10-Mar-19 09:31:21

Was she pissed? Its obvs not 'normal' behaviour!

marvellousnightforamooncup Sun 10-Mar-19 09:31:25

Sorry, thread's moved on a bit from the locked door comment.

Ellapaella Sun 10-Mar-19 09:31:27

I suspect what OP wants is some assurance that this idiot parent isn't going to show up at school banging in doors and behaving in an aggressive and threatening manner which the children found frightening again.

Barrenfieldoffucks Sun 10-Mar-19 09:31:37

Our school has its doors locked during the day, absolutely. But for evening things like discos they're open so latecomers can come in, people can go home when they like etc.

Ellapaella Sun 10-Mar-19 09:31:44

Which is perfectly reasonable

Namechangeforthiscancershit Sun 10-Mar-19 09:32:00

They need to employ a better DJ. A decent sound system and 120 children should have drowned out the noise of a woman banging on some doors and kicking some glass

grin this is true!

howwillwedeal Sun 10-Mar-19 09:32:06

That's a horrible thing to happen, but you seem to be very dramatic about it and maybe your DC is feeding off that. They have to go back to school, so best save your energy for that.

What crime were you considering pressing charges for?

Livelovebehappy Sun 10-Mar-19 09:32:24

Op, are you wanting to sue just for justice against this person, ie locked up, cautioned etc, or are you looking for monetary recompense? If money - what is it for? Therapy for you and your child?

Happyspud Sun 10-Mar-19 09:32:57

Some kids thought it was a terrorist attack, how terrifying. Except it wasn’t so actually what is the issue? That they worried for a few minutes they were being attacked? My son worries for a few minutes there’s a monster under his bed, except there isn’t so although reality doesn’t make the fear go away I simply reassure him and we move on.

dayswithaY Sun 10-Mar-19 09:34:02

Seems like you and Crazy Mum have a lot in common.

howwillwedeal Sun 10-Mar-19 09:34:38

*To the rest of your, go fuck yourself.

Thank goodness your child has someone calm and balanced to help her deal with this upset. She must feel very reassured.*

^^this!

I tell you what OP how about suing her for psychological damage as well?

Frecklesonmyarm Sun 10-Mar-19 09:34:43

OP arrent you going to answer the issue that you actually have no facts regarding this.

Or how she broke reinforced glass

And why you are believing children's accounts. When it's the children that terrified your kids saying they thought it was a terrorist. They were wrong.

I am expecting what happened was that she was banging on the door and the kids thought she might break the glass.

JohnnyHatesJazz Sun 10-Mar-19 09:34:52

How would suing her help your DC? Are you just looking for a pay out?

gamerwidow Sun 10-Mar-19 09:35:21

What this woman did was appalling and must have terrified the kids. I assume we are talking primary school so these children were as young as four at the time of the incident.
She absolutely should have been arrested at the time for criminal damage and breach of the peace.
Those children will now not feel safe at school a place they previously thought noone could hurt them is now going to feel scary. I would be livid if that happened at my school and there were no consequences.
Unfortunately it’s up to the police and cps to decide if they prosecute but I can see why the OP feels angry and helpless.
I don’t know why people are minimising this. I was out at a club and someone starting smashing the door in, breaking glass and screaming abuse I would be shook up even as an adult, it wasn’t just an adult banging a bit loudly on the doors.

LonelyandTiredandLow Sun 10-Mar-19 09:36:04

I cannot believe some of the responses on here - obviously you live in fucking fairy land that you think that people don't go into schools armed and willing to kill people!

OP generally this happens in America, it is certainly not common in UK. Especially in a rural village as you have said your school is and even less likely to be perpetuated by a woman. In fact I assumed that the parent was likely drunk from your description, which would be more concerning for me than assuming she was "armed" hmm.

I do wonder how you will prove trauma. We had a tramp swearing and smashing a shop window on the high street last year in front of a load of kids, including my dd. She certainly wouldn't remember that now although it was threatening at the time. He was carrying a brick and completely off his head. The last thing I considered was pressing charges for trauma! What would that achieve?

I'd suggest that if the school isn't pressing charges they are not concerned about long term impact and are probably thinking she's embarrassed herself enough. Is it financial payout you want?

Itssosunny Sun 10-Mar-19 09:36:45

Children get easily frightened.
I find it a bit strange the school had to make the room completely dark and if someone banged on the doors they didn't bother to open the curtain and check. When we have a disco at school, first it's KS1 and then later KS2. The doors to the hall are not shut and there are no curtains used to make the room completely dark. There are teachers and parent-helpers. Parents come to collect children through the reception (doors with a code opened by a member of staff). If I came to school and couldn't get into it I would become a little worried as well but in no way I justify that parent's screeming and banging on the door. It must have been frightening for the little ones. One person would say it's a terrorist and then everyone would be talking about it.

gamerwidow Sun 10-Mar-19 09:36:47

Ps what kind of shit holes do the rest of you live in where this would be unremarkable behaviour?

StillCoughingandLaughing Sun 10-Mar-19 09:36:54

My first thought when you mentioned ‘terrorist attacks’ was that some of the children were embellishing because they were enjoying the drama. Kids do that.

Then you broke out the caps lock and I started to think that maybe parents old enough to know better were the ones creating the drama.

HappyBeeMe Sun 10-Mar-19 09:36:58

OP, I understand what you are saying... this must have been frightening for the children. The parent acted in a manner that caused fear and alarm to your child. Surely, this is a reportable offence?

Wolfiefan Sun 10-Mar-19 09:37:08

Locked up for kicking a door?
She needs to pay? For what? The glass?
Someone was angry. The school dealt with it. Nobody was injured. She was cross and behaved like an idiot.
You can either stop fuming and making something out of very little or do your best DM sad face and get a few minutes to rant in public. Which would be best for your child?! hmm

1Redacted1 Sun 10-Mar-19 09:37:09

This is brilliant! OP, please keep posting. Top entertainment for a Sunday morning.

Hoppinggreen Sun 10-Mar-19 09:37:32

I really think someone should “press charges” against those Y6 drama llamas who said it was a terrorist attack. We need to know that they are being suitably punished for what they did, banned from school and of course removed from any WhatsApp groups

IceRebel Sun 10-Mar-19 09:37:42

When we have a disco at school, first it's KS1 and then later KS2.

I said this earlier, a disco for ages 4-11 is very unusual.

Chloemol Sun 10-Mar-19 09:38:01

No and if you were a responsible parent you would help your child through this ‘tramua’ By talking it out, making the child see it’s not normal behaviour but things happen in life and they need to get on. Otherwise how will it cope when life gets tougher as they get older

Ellapaella Sun 10-Mar-19 09:38:02

@gamerwidow yes I totally agree. I can't imagine why anyone wouldn't be pissed off if their child came home frightened because a grown adult was banging on school doors, shouting and behaving in a threatening and aggressive manner.

Heratnumber7 Sun 10-Mar-19 09:38:13

OP, you are being absolutely ridiculous. As is the school for locking a door that would be a main escape route if there was a fire. That's what you should be complaining about.

LakieLady Sun 10-Mar-19 09:38:24

*So what if the woman has mh issues - I do but I would never break the glass in a school with a school hall full of children!

Her behaviour is inexcusable whatever her reason!*

Actually, if this woman has MH issues, that is the one thing that would make her behaviour excusable. That's why diminished responsibility is a legal defence. Mental illness used to be known as "loss of reason", precisely because it can prevent sufferers from acting reasonably.

TacoLover Sun 10-Mar-19 09:38:49

If you were in America I would understand the reactions of the kids due to the huge numbers of school shootings. Over here, not so much.

GinandGingerBeer Sun 10-Mar-19 09:38:50

Blimey! Some of the responses! I'm not surprised they were terrified, and although children might be aware of the threat of a terror attack, they don't know what form it might take so it's completely understandable some of the older ones thought it was and then it escalated from there.
I'd have been bloody traumatised myself.

Rosegarden10 Sun 10-Mar-19 09:38:55

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Barrenfieldoffucks Sun 10-Mar-19 09:39:05

Of course it is remarkable behaviour. But seeing X's mum through the glass getting shitty and then breaking it sign something that should be blown into a traumatic potential terrorist incident. "Wasn't she an angry lady, that's not the way to behave is it, good job the teachers know what to do in that situation, it must have been a big shock for you" etc etc.

gamerwidow Sun 10-Mar-19 09:39:10

I run school discos all the time during the disco parents are locked out the building for security so we can keep track of who is coming and going. All children have to be signed in and out. If you banged on the door you’d be told to go away until the disco has ended.

hardyloveit Sun 10-Mar-19 09:39:36

A school disco for the whole primary is not uncommon in rural areas! My child's sch does this as the school has only 100 or so pupils

gamerwidow Sun 10-Mar-19 09:40:56

Ps it’s not a fire risk there are 5 fire exits into the playground from the hall.

YogaWannabe Sun 10-Mar-19 09:41:22

You want her brought to trail?!
Lay of the crime dramas for a while OP

JacquesHammer Sun 10-Mar-19 09:41:45

That is the dictionary definition of press charges. So all you fuckwits who think I want to sue for money - learn what press charges means

Says the person who had to ask if they could press charges grin

TapasForTwo Sun 10-Mar-19 09:42:02

Why do incidents like this often get blamed on mental health issues? I feel that it gives those with genuine mental health problems a bad name.

thedisorganisedmum Sun 10-Mar-19 09:42:28

I'm a bit shock that a primary age child should suspect a terrorist attack when an angry shouty woman bashes on a glass door and breaks it.
What have these children been allowed to watch on tv?

my thoughts precisely.

Any parent would be massively pissed off, but the OP is ridiculously over reacting, maybe because she was scared herself and pictured a terrorist attack which is every parent's fear. That's understandable, but what isn't is to fuel the kids upset.

Chill out OP, or at least pretend you are. There's no need for a child to be scared to go back to school because someone smashed a window.
It's not about you, it's about your child not being traumatised when there's no need to be.

Springwalk Sun 10-Mar-19 09:42:57

I you can’t press charges.

I suggest you descalate this situation by talking to your child about accidents. It was not a lock down it was an ‘accident’ and the glass will be repaired and all is fine in the world.

You are feeding the drama. Stop.

It is far nore likely that the mother broke the glass by accident, rather than intentionally and is probably mortified. If the police had suspected she deliberately did this to the window, she would have been charged with criminal damage, but she wasn’t. So lay off the drama and tell your child the poor mother made a mistake fgs.

JacquesHammer Sun 10-Mar-19 09:43:36

Right, assuming this is genuine which let’s face it doesn’t look likely, how would bringing this woman “to trial” assist your children?

You’re far better helping them through it by turning the way it was dealt with into a positive.

Wolfiefan Sun 10-Mar-19 09:44:12

Fuckwits? Nice.
What crime?
You’re angry that your child was upset. I can understand that. This was completely unacceptable behaviour from the parent. But no crime was committed against your child. And instead of seeking to reassure them that they weren’t in danger (and this woman was being silly and behaving in a daft way) you seem to want her locked up and the key thrown away. confused

LonelyandTiredandLow Sun 10-Mar-19 09:44:16

If you could confirm a crime it would be helpful.
It wasn't your door/glass. You can't prove trauma. The school isn't backing you up.

No need to swear so much, it doesn't help you look rational.

DurhamDurham Sun 10-Mar-19 09:44:32

I think it would have been scary for the children but your attitude on here is ridiculous. I can feel the aggression from here, the sheer number of exclamation marks is unsettling in itself grin

x2boys Sun 10-Mar-19 09:44:48

Nobodies minimizing it gamerwidow just pointing out the Op.can't press charges ,it's up to the police to investigate it and whilst lt ,s obviously upsetting for the kids ,they will.get over , I don't think anyone is suggesting it's unremarkable behaviour .

StealthPolarBear Sun 10-Mar-19 09:44:57

Agree with gamer widow. Have people missed that she was threatening to kill the head teacher? This could potentially have been the start of something very nasty, clearly it didn't happen but I'm not surprised that the kids were terrified. I agree suing her is counter productive but all the people telling the op she's over dramatising it are competing at being underwhelmed if you ask me.

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