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AIBU?

To ask your tips for getting over heartbreak.

11 replies

mistakenidentity1928 · 09/03/2019 21:07

I’m struggling to stabilise my mood, resilience and return to my happy place after being heartbroken.

I’m committed to moving on. I am;

Throwing myself into parenting and work.
Trying to talk/ meet with friends more.
I’ve gone completely no contact and deleted/ blocked his number.

I’m wondering if I’d benefit from antidepressants. I’ve never felt I needed them before but I feel broken and utterly miserable.

AIBU to start a thread asking for tips? I’ll try anything at this point!

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dancemom · 09/03/2019 21:09

Distraction. Try and start a project / pick up a hobby.

I upped my gym sessions which both gave me something else to focus on and helped me sleep better.

Lots of motivational quotes too!

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Mistlewoeandwhine · 09/03/2019 21:10

It just takes time. That’s the truth. You’re doing all the right things. Keep busy. It’s terrible and I’ve been there but eventually the pain will pass. Hugs to you xx

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brighton2016 · 09/03/2019 21:11

How long has it been?
It's hard but time is a healer x

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LizaCarlisle · 09/03/2019 21:13

YANBU

When I split from my stbxh 18 months ago I though my life would never be the same again.... but date I say it, today, my life feels a hell of lot better!

Take comfort in your kids- being a single mum while your heart is breaking is so difficult but my dd got me through some of my toughest moments. Kids are so innocent and knowing I had to keep myself together for her meant I had to man up and 'fake it till I make it' .

Obviously No contact is a given if you don't have kids with ex which it seems you are doing....

And venting on here is always helpful!

I couldn't just read and run, I just wanted to reassure you that you will feel better. It is literally just a matter of taking it a day at a time Thanks

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mistakenidentity1928 · 09/03/2019 21:13

Thanks for replying, I am desperate for this awful pain to end. I will never expose myself emotionally again - this is the first time I’ve ever felt heartbroken and it is definitely the last too!

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LizaCarlisle · 09/03/2019 21:14

*dare I say it

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mistakenidentity1928 · 09/03/2019 21:14

Almost three weeks and it isn’t getting any easier. I think about his all the time and feel sad about the loss of the future I imagined for us.

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Pyracantha2 · 09/03/2019 21:15

Visualisation. Take your pain and visualise it, a spiky ball? A sharp cornered cube?

Where is it in your body? Your heart? Your stomach? Your head?

Make it smaller and smaller and smaller and smaller, so small it can travel around your veins or through your pores... perhaps it becomes like a gas and can seep out of you?

Make that pain leave your body, look out of the window at the stars, let the now minuscule pain go up into the stars and float away. It’s up here, it’s still there, but the universe will look after it now and you can start to heal.

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mistakenidentity1928 · 09/03/2019 21:17

Oh Pyracantha2 I’m going to try that! I will do anything to make it go away at this point Sad

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Pyracantha2 · 09/03/2019 21:30

Turn the lights off, look out of the window, open a window or go outside if it’s safe and really VISUALISE.

💜

It honestly worked for me.

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MemorylikeDory · 09/03/2019 21:59

You say you've deleted and blocked their number. If you find you do know their number and want to text them. First don't! Second type the text in Your notes and save it. Repeat for every single time you want to contact them. It gets it out of your system and you're not actually sending it.

Cut all social media ties with their family and any friends that you know because of them. Realistically you're not going to stay friends with them.

Wake up everyday and make the most effort clothes hair and makeup wise that you would normally make.

Finally just remember it does pass no matter how much you think it won't. I remember asking people how long the pain would last. I also wished that the film eternal sunshine of the spotless mind was true. I'd have paid anything. After a break up I think you end up remembering the good and the happy times and forget the troubled times.

Really finally! Look at today's date and remember it. In a years time when you look at the date again you'll see how far you've come and wonder why you cried all the tears you did. ThanksThanksThanks

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