Advanced search

To ask if your partner or sibling comes first?

(251 Posts)
Seabrook15 Sat 09-Mar-19 16:30:06

I know this depends on circumstances and relationships, but in general, I am wondering what the majority answers! I am in a bit of a situation that although I don't have to "pick" between the 2, it also kind of is. Just wondering, if asked that question, what you'd answer?

TapasForTwo Sat 09-Mar-19 16:34:05


workinprogressmum Sat 09-Mar-19 16:35:02


blueskiesovertheforest Sat 09-Mar-19 16:35:08

Spouse. Which IMO is as it should be in a relationship you've made a lifetime commitment to.

It depends what you mean by partner though - on/ off boyfriend of 10 months standing or the adult with whom you form a household, probably share finances, possibly are raising children with, and have been with for years and years?

HK20 Sat 09-Mar-19 16:35:20

Partner for me too

hairypaws Sat 09-Mar-19 16:36:17

Definitely my partner. We have made vows together and don't take them lightly.

grinningcheshirecat Sat 09-Mar-19 16:36:22


BreastSideStory Sat 09-Mar-19 16:37:13

My DP comes before everyone else in my life except for my DC, and even then I would put him first in some circumstances.

twoshedsjackson Sat 09-Mar-19 16:40:34

You chose your partner; you share DNA with your sibling. without having had any choice in the matter, although with any luck you have a close, affectionate relationship.
But as blueskiesovertheforest says, it may depend how longstanding the partnership is, and how close the sibling links have remained once you are adults.

Ragwort Sat 09-Mar-19 16:42:16

Surely it depends on the situation, why should you have to ‘pick’ one or the other? If my DH decided he didn’t like my sibling & asked me to go NC with him I wouldn’t agree to that, but it wouldn’t be ‘picking’ one over the other confused. Can you give an idea of what the situation is?

DramaAlpaca Sat 09-Mar-19 16:43:30

My DH before my sibling.

LL83 Sat 09-Mar-19 16:44:21

Whoever is in the right if something serious. General spat I would stay out of it and in private tell them both it's important to me that they resolve it.

ILiveInSalemsLot Sat 09-Mar-19 16:44:23

That’s tough for me as I’m very close to my siblings. Thankfully I’ve never had to chose between them but it would depend what it is.

museumum Sat 09-Mar-19 16:44:36

Husband. No doubt. He’s earned my love and care. My brother never has.

picklemepopcorn Sat 09-Mar-19 16:45:50

Depends on who is being unreasonable. Generally speaking, partner. If partner has done something outrageous or you relationship is on the rocks anyway, then sibling.

Sibling relationship is the longest you will have in your whole life.

LaurenOrdering Sat 09-Mar-19 16:47:34

It very much depends on the situation & the seriousness of it.

Mmmhmmm Sat 09-Mar-19 16:48:08


DroningOn Sat 09-Mar-19 16:52:27


Missingstreetlife Sat 09-Mar-19 17:05:05


ZeldaPrincessOfHyrule Sat 09-Mar-19 17:06:25

It massively depends on the situation.

Albamahanna Sat 09-Mar-19 17:07:05

Depends on situation. But for most situations, partner would come first and would expect my sibling to think the same.

MyDcAreMarvel Sat 09-Mar-19 17:07:42

Husband but I love my sisters.

Nanna50 Sat 09-Mar-19 17:08:19

Depends on the situation, who needs me the most at that time, although I would expect either one to understand and support me in my decision.

It depends on the context and consequences really.

Panda117 Sat 09-Mar-19 17:08:41

Whoever isn’t forcing me to pick. Hugely depends on the situation, bu5 wouldn’t automatically be partner.

2birds1stone Sat 09-Mar-19 17:08:58


Join the discussion

Registering is free, quick, and means you can join in the discussion, watch threads, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Get started »