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AIBU?

To banish DP from the bedroom until he gets his feet sorted..

99 replies

Februaryblooms · 09/03/2019 00:19

DP is not an unhygenic person in general and showers every single day without fail, the problem is his feet. They are rancid. Even after he washes and puts on fresh socks they stink. The smell does not go away and it's extremely difficult to live with. It has been this way for the past 18 months and I've had enough of it after repeatedly telling him he needs to have whatever it is treated.

He's on his feet constantly with work but has accepted there must be a fungal infection causing the problem. He refuses to see the GP because "it's embarrassing" and hasn't bothered buying anything for it himself so continues to inflict it on me and poor DS. I'm at the end of my tether.

He tries to 'manage' it at home by constantly changing his socks, buying new ones, doing several wash loads per week of just his socks and washing himself religiously every day which makes no difference whatsoever. He refuses to talk to a pharmacist or GP at all.

AIBU to ban him from sleeping in the bed until he sorts his bloody feet. I can't stomach it any more Sad

OP posts:
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FissionChip5 · 09/03/2019 00:22

Could he order the cream online if he’s embarrassed? Many pharmacies have online consultation services.

YANBU

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Singlenotsingle · 09/03/2019 00:23

Do a bit of research. Ask the pharmacist. Google smelly feet. There must be an answer.

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Cravingseaside · 09/03/2019 00:24

Tell him to try sprinkle bicarb of soda on his feet after a bath (or maybe massage tons of it in!) and in his socks before wearing, also shoes! Worth a try. He really does need to see a doctor or pharmacist!

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Userplusnumbers · 09/03/2019 00:25

It's probably athlete's foot. He needs some antifungal, if it's been going on for 18 months he'll need the prescription strength stuff.

Also new work shoes, two pairs, so rotate each day.

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Aquamarine1029 · 09/03/2019 00:25

He's being a fucking infant. Embarrassed? The gp has seen it ALL, and a fungal infection is commonplace. Tell him to grow up and fucking deal with it. How vile. Please show him this thread.

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Gizmo79 · 09/03/2019 00:29

Not bu at all. He knows he has a problem, he needs to sort that problem out!!!

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Februaryblooms · 09/03/2019 00:43

It grates on me because he knows full well he has a problem. I'm beginning to think he just doesn't care enough about it to do anything about it. My DM commented on the smell when she was visiting and he just happened to walk into the room as she said it, that wasn't enough for him to do anything about it.

He's had comments at work about how the locker room smells when he puts his work boots in there, still no action.

I've had a similar battle with his snoring. I forked out on four different items which were designed to help but he never bothered committing to trying them.

He comes across as very selfish.

OP posts:
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TheInvestigator · 09/03/2019 00:59

Make an appointment for him, and take him there if you have too. After 18 months of poor hygiene and ignoring the affect on the family I would be giving him 2 option; see the GP or move out.

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aidelmaidel · 09/03/2019 01:11

He's being pathetic and YANBU.

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Kirsty157 · 09/03/2019 01:19

Bathing his feet every evening in tea tree oil or the pink hibi scrub works to kill the bacteria that makes his feet smell. He needs to make sure he wears different shoes every other day to let them dry out.
My OH had this exact problem and it was horrible, but it was sorted within a week and hasn’t been a problem since

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SeaToSki · 09/03/2019 01:31

Tell him if he doesnt sort it soon, there is a good chance it will spread to his groin. The bacteria and fungi like damp moist places like between toes and between bollocks. Towels, hands etc all may spread it.

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FrogFairy · 09/03/2019 01:35

Hibiscrub to wash, Daktacort to treat possible fungal infection, Peditech to prevent odour and M&S Freshfeet socks.

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Aquamarine1029 · 09/03/2019 01:38

This really isn't just about his foot odour. It's about the the fact he doesn't give a single fuck about how you feel or how his nastiness impacts you. You can do better.

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mokapot · 09/03/2019 01:42

Fungal or pitted keratolysis

Both easily treated

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BingLiveisRubbish · 09/03/2019 01:58

What a selfish git. What if it spreads to his child? In fact what a terrible example he's showing his son by not doing anything about it, besides it's effect on you & your child ShockConfused

Seriously selfish

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Peopleshouldread · 09/03/2019 02:55

YANBU.
Ban away - if he won't help himself he needs to suffer the consequences. After all, everyone else suffers from his apathy - all the time.

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Graphista · 09/03/2019 03:18

He's being an idiot!

Untreated athletes foot can lead to serious infection (which it sounds like is already the case - it tends to be Bacteria which stinks!) which if also untreated can lead to complications resulting in loss of toes/feet I've seen it happen (ex nurse). Mainly in homeless or isolated elderly people who've struggled to get access to treatment.

I also suspect the socks (and towels? Bet he's not using a new towel each time either) aren't being washed at a high enough temperature to kill the fungus - needs to be min 60*c

I wouldn't want him in the same bed either!

Tell him to grow the fuck up, get to Drs (or even nurse practitioner could deal with this, or chiropodist) or risk losing a toe or even a whole foot! He could even be putting himself at risk of DVT etc

Fucking Idiot!

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Mummyoflittledragon · 09/03/2019 03:28

I cannot fathom people, who find something like this embarrassing. You have a child, assuming he is your biological child and you gave birth vaginally, you will most probably have shit yourself when giving birth. Most women have experienced thrush at some point in their lives. It’s just par for the course.

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HopelesslydevotedtoGu · 09/03/2019 03:29

Various treatments can be bought online rather than needing to speak to a doctor or pharmacist.
I used to have very smelly feet, in my case what helped is:
Anti odour/ anti fungal spray every day and after bath/ shower
Anti odour insoles in shoes
Wash all shoes that can be washed. Those that can't replace the insoles
Rotate shoes - don't wear the same ones two days in a row
Always wear socks with shoes
When you get home, wash feet, spray with anti odour/ fungal spray then go barefoot in house

If these steps don't help I'd speak to a pharmacist next.

I think reasonable to ban him from the bed until he addresses this.

With the frequent sock washes, it does sound like he does care, just that something - embarrassment? Fear? - is stopping him taking the next step.

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Justagirlwholovesaboy · 09/03/2019 03:31

@Mummyoflittledragon women do not poo slander!!! Seriously OP I would be demanding a gp appointment. If he refuses give him a time out in another room since he’s acting like a toddler

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PenelopeFlintstone · 09/03/2019 03:34

I know someone who fixed his with normal anti-bacterial gel in the pump bottles. It just took a few days. A very cheap fix.

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expat101 · 09/03/2019 04:02

Live near the coastline? Go for a family walk and ensure he gets his feet wet in the salt water (make sure his toenails are trimmed back). Repeat each weekend. Works wonders.

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SusieQ5604 · 09/03/2019 04:08

I had a fungal infection in my toenails which made my feet, socks and shoes stink. Nothing worked til I had some type of (completely painless) laser treatment where the toenails were zapped. No more yellow nails, no more fungus, NO MORE SMELL!!!!!

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Graphista · 09/03/2019 04:20

It honestly sounds like it's beyond home remedies/otc treatments now.

I think the problem is most people now have no experience of conditions going untreated and what that can mean (because sensible people get it treated! What with us having a free at point of use healthcare system and modern miracles like antibiotics available)

Honestly op he needs to get it treated properly, this is ridiculous

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Mummyoflittledragon · 09/03/2019 04:34

Not medical myself. But I have seen gruesome photos of easily treated conditions being left. They are behind gross. Perhaps you should show them to him. And listen to Graphista she definitely knows her stuff.

@Justagirlwholovesaboy
I stand corrected. We ladies go all of a glow and bodily waste including flatulence is dealt with by faries. Grin

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