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To think you can’t hold a baby too much ?

(51 Posts)
SpinningSister Fri 08-Mar-19 16:25:46

I’ve got one 7 week old boy who I waited 10 years for.
Why do people insist on saying it’s better for a baby to be in a crib or bouncer than on my chest or arms ? That’s basically what they are saying ?

Of course to have a wee or make a tea he gets put down but im happy to hold him for a day watching tele and why shouldn’t I?

The silliest argument I have heard is if I had other children it wouldn’t be possible to hold him so often, but I don’t, so it’s surely a moot point.

Can you spoil a bloody 7 week old baby grrrr

PinkHeart5914 Fri 08-Mar-19 16:28:02

A baby needs loves which it receives from cuddles and attention. What’s the point in having a child if you dump it in a bouncer for long periods as you don’t want to cuddle it too much?

I’ve got 3 dc all close in age and always still managed to cuddle them, wasn’t really any harder having more than 1

HomeMadeMadness Fri 08-Mar-19 16:28:05

They're talking rubbish. Your baby is tiny and the more you cuddle them the better (assuming they get some tummy time and daddy gets cuddles too). If you had other children you could still pop the new baby in a wrap or cuddle both at the same time.

CuppaSarah Fri 08-Mar-19 16:29:01

You can't spoil a baby and even if you could, would it matter? Cuddling them is so lovely and they grow so fast. I quite like the rod I've made for my own back, my six month old loves cuddles and I'm more than happy to provide as many as she wants. It's a fabulous rod.

Enjoy your baby and give everyone who tells you to put them down the finger.

LLOE7 Fri 08-Mar-19 16:30:23

Absolutely you can never cuddle a baby too much. Holding your baby constantly is instinct and the best and most natural thing for you both. A baby NEEDS to be kept close to mum. I bet these same people who tell you that also encourage you to leave him to cry to 'exercise his lungs'?!

mbosnz Fri 08-Mar-19 16:33:45

The parents can NEVER hold their babe too much. I have, however, seen a newborn cry because it's been treated like pass the sodding parcel at a family event where every man and his dog had to have their turn holding the poor wee babe.

Mrsfrumble Fri 08-Mar-19 16:34:57

Please go ahead and cuddle your gorgeous tiny boy all day long! Drink up every second. I hope you’re sniffing and kissing his downy little head plenty too.

DS was born in the winter of 2010 (v. Cold and snowy) and DH was laid up having chemo at the time, so we spent the first few months of DS’s life on the sofa watching box sets, passing the baby between us. It was very cosy!

DS is 8 now and still a cuddle bug (albeit a very fidgety, gangly one).

Nothininmenoggin Fri 08-Mar-19 16:35:37

You are doing exactly the right thing. You cannot spoil a baby they have no comprehension of how to manipulate you at this stage in their life. A baby needs to be close to Mum or Dad don't be told otherwise it is good for brain development, and makes them feel safe and loved. It's also very good for you and natural to want to hold and cuddle your baby, especially at such a young age. Congratulations by the way.flowers

CaptainMyCaptain Fri 08-Mar-19 16:36:20

Ignore them. You can't cuddle a baby too much.

feelingverylazytoday Fri 08-Mar-19 16:37:15

It's up to you really. If you want to hold your baby 24/7 then go ahead.
Personally I preferred to put all my babies down to sleep, and I would have been mightily pissed off if anyone had picked them up and started carrying them around in a sling or whatever.

FooFighter99 Fri 08-Mar-19 16:37:20

DD slept on me during the day till she was about 5 months old! I got VERY good at doing things one handed grin

Enjoy it while it last and don't listen to the nay sayers!

PippilottaLongstocking Fri 08-Mar-19 16:38:05

The time when they’re willing to just be held all day is very short so make the most of it! Also the people who say you couldn’t hold them all day of you have other kids are wrong, I have two (plus many nieces and nephews who I look after often) and my smallest just lived in the sling when he was tiny so I could have my hands free but still have him close

PippilottaLongstocking Fri 08-Mar-19 16:38:49

Also I once managed to tie my shoelaces one handed whilst holding a breastfeeding baby in the other arm!

crispysausagerolls Fri 08-Mar-19 16:38:58

I did and still
Do exactly the same! You crack on xxx baby cuddles are the best

switswoo81 Fri 08-Mar-19 16:40:00

In a few short months he will be sliding off your lap to explore some new found skills so enjoy the moment.

FurrySlipperBoots Fri 08-Mar-19 16:42:52

Actually I think you can hold a baby too much. Not because it will 'spoil' them, or crap like that, but because If they were strapped to you every waking hour they wouldn't be getting enough stimulation. The first month or 2 you want to keep them close but after that they need to have more freedom to wiggle and kick and reach and roll, and be experiencing more of the world than just you.

53rdWay Fri 08-Mar-19 16:44:53

YANBU. You’re happy, he’s happy, there are plenty of cultures across the world where babies are held round the clock and do fine, and you won’t still be stuffing him in a Close Caboo when he’s 17.

MutantDisco Fri 08-Mar-19 16:45:20

Both my babies were next to me day and night for the first year at least. We co-slept and I popped them in a sling if we had to go anywhere.

Babies thrive when they're given lots of cuddles.

lboogy Fri 08-Mar-19 16:45:20

Cuddle your baby as much as you want and ignore anyone who says otherwise

AnneLovesGilbert Fri 08-Mar-19 16:49:07

Congratulations on your lovely baby smile

Cuddle away!

Dontsweatthelittlestuff Fri 08-Mar-19 16:49:41

Not all babies want to be cuddled all the time. I have 2 children. The oldest hated being cuddled and liked to self settle. The 2nd spent his first 18 months with his head up my jumper and wouldn’t settle on his own.
Not really an issue as they are both adults now and I don’t rock either one to sleep.

TrainSong Fri 08-Mar-19 16:52:30

IMO you can't hold a baby too much. They love cuddles. It helps them feel calm and secure, helps them bond with you, keeps them warm and comforted.
Of course you could spend a fortune on plastic baby gyms with whizzy lights to entertain them and padded floor mats and electric bouncer chairs to do all that for you.
First rule of sanity when you have a new baby: you can't take all the advice you are given. It comes at you from all sides and is contradictory. Do what feels right for you and your child.

SoyDora Fri 08-Mar-19 16:53:14

My 7 week old would hate to be held/cuddled all day, he likes to lie on the floor and stretch his legs out/kick around/try and roll. And actually I do think they need ‘floor times’ to stretch out and develop their muscles.
But in general no, you can’t ‘spoil’ a baby by holding them too much.

SpinningSister Fri 08-Mar-19 16:55:41

I did wonder about the stimulating thing

He comes round the house in his bouncer while I work and I tell him what I’m doing, or put nursery rhymes on you tube and work and sing along.

I don’t use a sling so he can see more, and he sleeps in a Moses basket so I can eat breakfast a lot of time when I’m not house working or eating he’s in my arms.

So he’s not strapped to me and of a weekend when DH is home my mum comes and we clean together and talk (I had a traumatic birth and nicu baby) for 4 hours while DH and my dad has the baby

I feel the above is perfectly reasonable!

user1471426142 Fri 08-Mar-19 17:04:45

They are little for such a short period of time and soon enough they rebel against the cuddles unless they’re tired or sick so cuddle away. That said, I think you can hold an older baby too much. They do need tummy time and the opportunity to explore a bit. At 3-4 months my baby was happy to self settle to sleep and I then got into a bad habit of cuddling to sleep for naps a few months later. I used to spend 3 hours a day in silence stuck to the sofa. I would not recommend that again even though I loved the cuddles. It just made it much harder to beak the habit later. So in my case, I did hold my baby too much in hindsight.

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